12. I wanna see what my full artistic potential looks like.
That is probably the best reason. Trust me on this.
I just turned 55, and went through the thoughts of suicide when I was in Uni. Life gets better as you age, but you do have to work at it. Consciously doing things that don't come naturally. My creativity keeps increasing, and sometimes I'm even amazed at what I am capable of doing.
Suicide solves nothing, and is a hand grenade thrown at those who care about you.
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I wake to sleep, and take my waking slow. I feel my fate in what I cannot fear. I learn by going where I have to go. ~Theodore Roethke