I am starting to hate this site.

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22 Jul 2016, 8:32 pm

sugar cane and a lion's mane mean no gain when you're sane


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naturalplastic
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22 Jul 2016, 10:44 pm

Aniihya wrote:
What is the point of discussion if you dont take people seriously? The people here tend to be so extremely sensitive that it is really annoying.


So your main, and real, complaint is that folks on WP are too "sensitive"?

How sensitive is "sensitive"? Dont have to quote verbatim, but can you give examples of the kinda thing you mean?



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23 Jul 2016, 10:20 pm

Over my many years on Planet Earth, I've developed a thick skin, and I think of it as one of my strengths.


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23 Jul 2016, 10:30 pm

I believe the OP wishes there were more higher-functioning folk he could talk to.



Aniihya
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24 Jul 2016, 3:54 am

Naturalplastic, people are always jumping to conclusions or lack reading comprehension, so they go berserk over stuff they assume about me. It is like they think autism is an excuse for acting like a jackass.



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24 Jul 2016, 4:00 am

C2V wrote:
Where on WP does this take place? Topics like this always make me paranoid that I've just missed it completely when it's been right in front of my face. I hope to assume this is all done in the religion/philosophy/politics forum, which I don't even bother to read anymore as there seems to be no religion or philosophy, and pretty much nothing but American politics. Disagreement is fine, but disrespect about disagreement is a bit ick. Maybe autistics just lack the subtle lies everyone else uses to "smooth" things that arise through differences of opinion?


Lol I agree with that. All I hear about is Trump this and Trump that on the PPR.


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24 Jul 2016, 4:08 am

mookestink wrote:
My friend said, essentially, that he cares as much about women as most people care about dogs.
...
everyone tried to accuse this lone gunman that he had said that women are dogs. When in fact all he meant was he wasn't interested in relationships.

That may of been what he meant, but what he said compared women to dogs. I can see why people were offended by that.



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24 Jul 2016, 5:43 am

Aniihya, I agree with what you're saying on this thread, I don't really have anything to add myself, I just didn't want you to think you're the only one that can see it.



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24 Jul 2016, 8:46 am

Aniihya wrote:
I came to because I thought I could connect. But I do not even seem to get along with Aspies because they lose their sh*t because of simple questions or become "triggered" by opinions they disagree with etc. A lot of people here seem to believe in the worst nonsense, are extremely superficial, are ideological fanatics or want to not be treated like a normal person (snowflakes). This was the last straw and I don't think I will ever be able to form any decent relationships beyond the people I already know (and that aint too many).


I'm NT, yet despite this I appreciate your words and would concur. This is the reason I no longer post here much, cept to pass thru now n again. For the majority that's no loss because I'm just an NT but, I initially came here to learn more about what it means to be AS in an NT world due to my other half...

I found a place as you've described above. I've learnt that challenge and discourse is not appreciated. That there's a core of posters here that instead of reading the genuine intent behind the question, auto assume an attack.

Like you, I expected "more" and have felt the disappointment. A place that's supposed to have an overabundance of intellectual ability and impartiality and non-emotionally led bias, is anything BUT!

Don't leave, OP. Just quit posting for a time. Pop back in at a later point. Who knows, maybe things will have improved by then.



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24 Jul 2016, 10:37 am

Instead of judging the more emotional people you find here who are disappointing to your pre-defined hopes, which whiffs to me of expecting a bunch of Sheldons, why don't you either focus instead of the abundance of people here ARE to your liking -- because there ARE plenty of those good people here who don't react the ways you don't like. OR, just stop coming if you truly can't get past the minority you don't like and focus on the majority you do like.

Yes, there are emotional people here who "lose their sh!t" -- I'm one of them and I have wouldn't be surprised to learn that I may number among the list of people that you guys are holding grievance about.

But there are TONS of people who aren't like that, tons of people here who are very calm, very rational, and have what you're looking for. There is some impressive intellect being utilized with supreme rationality and restraint all over this site, every day. I see way more of those people posting here than ones like myself who are more troubled and sometimes incendiary.

And by the way, this being a site for people with neurology that makes life challenging.....if you are hoping not to run into troubled people who react poorly at times, then you're the one who is not quite using your intellectual ability. ;)

This is a support site for people who oftentimes have deep issues. And sometimes those people with deep issues are not always winning the fight regarding dealing optimally. Naturally not everything is going to be smooth around here.

If you don't want to deal with it then, as said before, overlook those members, posts, threads. If you can't just move on from them and notice the far more majority of members who are exactly what you want to see, then I don't know what else to say.

It helps to remember, too, that all communities may have a natural arc of usefulness to a person. Everything is cyclical, and repeats happen in all of nature itself.

A forum board is nothing but a mirror of what happens everywhere in life -- cycles, repeats, new coming in, old departing, freshness at first, "same old same old" after a while. If anyone is here long enough it's all going to get old. This is almost the stuff of the Universe in smaller scale.



Aniihya
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24 Jul 2016, 11:09 am

There is no abundance of such people. It is usually the 10k+ posters. The only people of reasonable decency I can think of right now are kraftiekortie, C2V and alex.



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24 Jul 2016, 11:48 am

Aniihya wrote:
There is no abundance of such people. It is usually the 10k+ posters. The only people of reasonable decency I can think of right now are kraftiekortie, C2V and alex.



The popular ones.


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BirdInFlight
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24 Jul 2016, 11:58 am

I can think of lots of people here of "reasonable decency" besides kraftie, C2V, Alex; there's also people like Tanaka, B19, BeaArthur, Raleigh, ASPartOfMe, Adamantium, Skilpadde, Fnord, OliveOilMom, redrobin62, nurseangela, Ezra, dianthus, Hyperborean, auntblabby -- these are just off the top of my head, and I'm forgetting many more people who I would include if I didn't have short term memory issues.

These are all examples of people who are highly intelligent, calm on here, post rationally, and even in a disagreement they remain respectful and logical rather than oversensitive or losing it. I don't think I've seen any of the above, or the many others I know I'm leaving out but who would also be on this list, get emotional or unable to engage rationally.

Trust me there are many more people even than these, although I guess it depends on where you go the most. Love & Dating, and Politics boards have a lot more intensity going on. Not that General doesn't get sh!t happening, it does, but if one were to hang out the most on the more incendiary boards, you might not get to see all the calm posts happening elsewhere.

There are plenty of calm people on this site, and more than I expected given that we all deal with something that isn't always conducive to coping well.

The fact is, it doesn't matter where you go, there will always, always, always be some people you like and respect and other people you can't stand and don't want in your life. That goes for forum boards, the local cafe/hangout, a group of friends if the group is big enough, a workplace, school, everywhere.

The best anyone can do is try to overlook the people they don't like and concentrate on the ones they do. There IS no collection of people comprised of all-perfect people nobody will ever dislike. That's one of the sad truths of the world, we are forever destined to both dislike and be disliked, like and be liked, but who does either of these is a different set of people.



BirdInFlight
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24 Jul 2016, 1:30 pm

By the way, Aniihiya, aren't you the same person who regularly donates to a sperm bank, but you withhold the information that you are diagnosed with ASD and the possible genetic ramifications that may have on the children being conceived without that knowledge in hand?



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24 Jul 2016, 1:53 pm

Aniihya wrote:
I came to because I thought I could connect. But I do not even seem to get along with Aspies because they lose their sh*t because of simple questions or become "triggered" by opinions they disagree with etc. A lot of people here seem to believe in the worst nonsense, are extremely superficial, are ideological fanatics or want to not be treated like a normal person (snowflakes). This was the last straw and I don't think I will ever be able to form any decent relationships beyond the people I already know (and that aint too many).


In my personal experience, this is more a characteristic of all large forums. All of them are an eternal fight between trolls, excessively sensitive members and a small minority of more rational people sandwiched in the middle of that, to various degrees. I haven't discovered any exception to this kind of structure, it seems universal.



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24 Jul 2016, 2:01 pm

The original poster has pointed out the ways in which Aspies struggle to get along with each other. When I started out recognizing I was different from other (i.e., NT) people, I thought aha, it should be easy for people with Aspergers to get together and they'll be able to relate. That is not necessarily true, and often a challenge results, from mixing any two people who do not understand social cues.

At the same time, a lot of NT's run like hell, because we are--to them--weird. My best acquaintances have been people who are NT, but who are "off" in little ways that tilt toward the Asperger side of the ledger.

I think we shouldn't have excessive expectations about the efficacy of social interactions between us Aspies. And yes, it is axiomatic that any Aspie who is intolerant of listening to different viewpoints will make their friendlessness far, far worse than it already can be.