I don't want to be me

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^^I agree. One of my best friendships was based on that kind of rhetoric, debating, playing devil's advocate etc.
He was a young conservative *shudder*, I hated pretty much everything he stood for but we were intellectually matched.

You can be tactful in your disagreements, and learn that there's a time and a place for them, but never hide your intelligence hurtloam. Intelligence is super attractive, to intelligent people

that is something you have the power to moderate and defer until the time is right [when you are in good with a potential mate who understands you and accepts you]. until then, you've heard the one about attracting bees with honey and not vinegar.