Anxious about going to stores

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You can still ring the shop and say "I just want to pick up xyz. Could I pay ahead and you have it ready for me?" Chances are they will meet you outside when you arrive, or else you just go straight to the til to pay. At my pharmacy everything is covered in plastic sheets and you have to ask them to retrieve the items straight into a bag for you, with a hand scanner for prices.

Joe everyone in the world is anxious about going to shops. Many people have compromised loved ones at home. Some of us are compromised ourselves. People have found ways to manage whether it be online with delivery (reserve a spot weeks ahead and keep changing your order as needed), or dealing with pick up situations and arrangements despite their stress.

It's a rough time for everyone.

If you type “supermarket name”+”location of self” into google it should bring up the phone number of your nearest store along with the other info.

I know what you mean about getting yelled at. To some people it’s a way of everyday life but I don’t want to be around it, listen to it, or see it on the screen.
Next time you need to go inside somewhere and there’s no way to be sure about breaking a sign limit, I’d prepare myself, swing the door open a bit, and holler not too loudly but super quickly asking how many are inside already. Kind of a preemptive strike, before they can yell.

I am not doing any online shopping. I've listened to people on WP before about how simple online shopping will be, in this thread viewtopic.php?f=23&t=385722&start=30 , so I tried doing it thinking that the situation was solved, only to see for myself that there were no delivery slots even for click and collect. It threw me into a meltdown because I felt helpless. So both of us have given up with the online crap. The town I live in is too overpopulated.

You have a habit of calling our advice "stupid", so it's hard to know how to help you. We have suggested everything under the sun for you but you have reasons to discredit everyone's advice. There's no reason why you can't ring ahead and have the order prepared, or ask them what the instructions would be for curbside / at-the-til collection. Most pharmacies will also deliver, even if your product isn't a prescription.

Sorry for replying when you ask for suggestions. It seems to be a waste of time.

I've never once called anybody's advice stupid here. Phoning up is the best thing I can do so for a start that isn't bad advice. But none of the other advice is bad, I know you all mean well but if shopping online feels fruitless for me that is just causing me more stress than actually going to the store myself.

Sometimes we get overwhelmed and no amount of advice is helpful at those times. There are ways out of being overwhelmed, such as meditative practices or exercise or improved sleep. But advice doesn't help an overwhelmed person because, by definition, they are at a point of not being able to implement stuff.

At those times, it's best to just listen and empathize.

I believe that a large proportion of people are feeling overwhelmed by this pandemic, narrowing their options and ramping up anxiety on a society-wide scale. In our household we use laughter a lot and also reaching out to resources (agencies, clinics, help sites). Those are effective for most of our needs.

Thank you for understanding. I was venting in my OP but I get people jumping down my throat for it (not you). I am having a lot of mental health issues right now and I can't help being irrational.



Yes but that IS very bad advice, especially if this goes on for another year. How the hell can you socially distance yourself from others that live with you, unless you have a large house with more than one bathroom and bedroom? A lot of people I know say how difficult that would be. You can avoid other people living in your house for a few days but for a few months? No. It cannot be done.

Written to Bea ^

@ Joe,
This is why, if you scroll back through your posts, I have sent you countless messages of empathy and support. I've sent you hugs. Many people have gone out of their way to be your haven and to support you not only with the coronavirus but prior, when you've been worried about your bf's smoking or his job or his coin collecting, about your mother and wedding plans and your own health worries (cervical cancer, alzheimer's, and other afflictions). I've sent you scores of messages with support when you're sad, and advice when you seek it. I've gone out of my way to be your friend and to tell you that I empathise. You seldom thank anyone and you ignore most of the advice that's given. Then you rant that some of the advice is stupid and you use f-words toward the good people of WP who tried to help. We all understand your anxiety. It's a key feature of autism. We're just trying to help, and it hurts when you can get frustrated and swear at members, but most of us have only tried to be your friend.

Good luck with your pharmacy.

I can't believe you have said that I don't thank people for supporting me or that I don't reply. I do actually read every reply but I can't reply to everyone's posts. It doesn't mean I go ignoring everyone or that I'm ungrateful.

In fact I have scrolled through some of my recent threads about this crisis, and I have noticed that I did in fact thank everyone for their support and I took the advice I was given.

I was very thankful that someone here have me this, as I have actually been in touch with Samaritans ever since, which has helped too.






All of these thank yous are from the same thread. Don't believe me then go and see for yourself in the thread titled "my anxiety has hit the roof". And that's not the only thread I have thanked people for their support, so don't go telling me that I rarely thank anyone or reply or follow advice.

I could reply and explain more, with many examples going back to when I joined, but I don't want this to sound like an argument. I'm not upset with you Joe. I like you. I really do wish you well and I empathise with your struggles. That's why I've always reached out and tried to help in whatever way I can. You have been much more appreciative to some people lately, but it hurts when you do rant against members. It would also be nice if I saw you give advice or hugs to other people in return, when they are in equal distress.

I'm not going to write any more, not because I don't care, but because I don't want this to become a back-and-forth.

Best wishes with everything.

I'm always giving emotional support to other members.

But it is common for humans to only notice all the things one does NOT do, rather than all the things one DOES do, even when the latter outnumbers the former.

I'm sick of having words put into my mouth. I'm sick of people accusing me of being an ungrateful twat when I'm often thanking people on WP for their replies and supporting other people here with their problems. I wish I had never started this stupid thread.

I'm only going to post things that are not related to coronavirus from now on.

At least Bea understands where I'm coming from.


But you can give me examples in PM if you want, as whenever I go and look for myself it seems that I am a team member of this site, but you're saying otherwise. Giving examples always helps me understand where I'm going wrong. I do feel a bit sad though because I do often give support to other members here and I feel like you are denying what I do and don't do.

???

I did read it and now re-read it, but it had nothing to do with what I wrote. I didn't say shop online, I suggested contacting the shop in advance for information. And I asked if there are any friends or relatives who could help, not counting your boyfriend since you said he was isolating.

Most of our family and friends don't live in the area, or are self-isolating themselves, don't have a car, or are very busy with their work (my boyfriend's niece is a key-worker at a hospital and literally hasn't had a day off in 10 days straight and is even staying at the hospital overnight). I don't like to expect friends to do my shopping as they're having anxieties of keeping up with their own shopping and work.