My outreach worker thinks I don't need my cloth helmet

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babybird
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16 Mar 2024, 12:59 pm

Always a pleasure


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goldfish21
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16 Mar 2024, 3:17 pm

Do you get negative looks or reactions to your hat when out in public?

I could imagine that some people might think it's a silly style of fashion and not for them, and since it's a fair bit different from the norm, it might get some looks. But I can't imagine anyone's going to see that colourful hat with a peace symbol on it and associate it with Nazis. I've also can't recall you ever posting that you supported the Nazi movement, Hitler, or anything of the sort.

Does your outreach worker think/assume that your interest in 1940's Germany is pro-Nazi/Hitler/Holocaust? :? Maybe that's the issue. Or perhaps they associate Anything 1940's Germany with those negative things and assume that everyone else will too and so they're trying to protect you from getting negative reactions from others in public.

But since you've been wearing your hat(s) for a long time already, you should already know how people react to them or not and if it's in a bad way that you may want to avoid. If no one really gives you any grief over it, then whatever, who cares? Just let your outreach worker know that you appreciate their concern but you'll continue wearing the hats you like because you feel good wearing them and they're not causing any harm to others or upsetting anyone in any way so w/e.


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CockneyRebel
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16 Mar 2024, 7:16 pm

My outreach worker does think that my liking Germany and the 40s is Pro-Nazi and it drives me crazy and she thinks I have very little empathy for the Jewish population or anyone else for that matter which is very far from the truth. I have a great deal of respect for Jews and other people who would be killed if these were the 1930s and 40s today.

The fact that my worker went to have a meeting with my staff without ME even knowing about it really hurts me on the inside. What was the meeting about? The hat. Before I changed the colour and put the peace-sign and flowers on it, it had a German flag and Iron Cross pinned onto it and it was the original black colour that it came in. I don't think I want to go to my clubhouse anymore because of that. That clubhouse was the last place that I could enjoy my free will. I wear that hat to keep my mind off my chronic severe lower leg pain that keeps me from being on the baseball and floor hockey team and to keep my mind off my bowel incontinence that I've had since the age of 32. I didn't always have that type of incontinence. That hat sure helps to keep my mind off it.

I've been keeping that hat home more often to please my worker even though I'm miserable due to the fact that I have nothing to distract me from gender dysphoria, lower leg pain and incontinence. I even had a brush with suicide this week because the pain and incontinence was constantly on my mind and the leg pain got to be too much for me to bare because I was constantly thinking about it because I didn't have my hat to distract me from it on some days.

I'm not going to my clubhouse anymore. There's no use of me going if I'm not going to be happy there.


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goldfish21
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17 Mar 2024, 3:41 am

Ask your outreach worker if they've seen the movie "Swing Kids," and tell her Those are the 1940's Germans you jive with. (If you haven't seen the movie, watch it.. it's so good!)

I very highly doubt it's their objective to make you not want to go to the clubhouse anymore due to not wearing what you want. Tell them that them making you not wear what you want makes you not want to go to the clubhouse and just stay in your room and you don't really like that. Maybe they'll figure out that it's pretty harmless to just let you keep wearing whatever you want if it makes you happier and more active. Point blank tell them that.. "Listen, I wear this hat. It's part of my identity. I feel comfortable and like myself when I wear it. It is what it is, just roll with it vs. discourage it.. it's not helping." Something like that. Maybe they'll get it.


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17 Mar 2024, 4:05 am

CockneyRebel wrote:
My outreach worker thinks that I should be able to leave my cloth helmet that I dyed a bright metallic blue and painted a peace-sign onto at home. Every time I leave my comfort object at home, I feel jaded, forlorn and downright cynical and miserable. I don't feel like myself without wearing my comfort object. I feel disassociated, jaded and like my insides are dried out when I don't have it with me. I'm not very easy to get along with if I leave my favourite hat at home. The books on the Holocaust aren't helping much, either. All for the crime of liking both Germany and the 1940s, I have to fit in and be miserable just to make my outreach worker happy. There are some moments I think that I'll get my free will back if I die and go to Heaven and that's the only way I will get it back. What should I do? Thank God, we're not together every waking hour of every waking day.


I mean I could see some reasons they may suggest leaving it at home, like maybe it isn't very stylish. But like if it's what makes you feel comfortable to go out...seems counterproductive they'd tell you to leave it at home. LIke it doesn't harm anyone if you wear the helmet.


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CockneyRebel
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17 Mar 2024, 4:27 am

Those are both very good suggestions. I'll tell my worker that not wearing what I want makes me want to stay home in my apartment and that's not what I want for myself. I'll also just wear the hat anyways.


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goldfish21
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17 Mar 2024, 4:31 pm

CockneyRebel wrote:
Those are both very good suggestions. I'll tell my worker that not wearing what I want makes me want to stay home in my apartment and that's not what I want for myself. I'll also just wear the hat anyways.

:heart: :heart: :heart: 8)


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CockneyRebel
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18 Mar 2024, 1:37 pm

I told my worker what I told you I was going to say. I also told her that I can take my cloth helmet each time I walk into a store. She said, "You could do that". I guess that she got tired of arguing with me.


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goldfish21
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18 Mar 2024, 1:50 pm

CockneyRebel wrote:
I told my worker what I told you I was going to say. I also told her that I can take my cloth helmet each time I walk into a store. She said, "You could do that". I guess that she got tired of arguing with me.


Success. She probably feels it's enough of a compromise, too. But maybe she Gets that it's just who you are what you like and it's not going to change so there's no point in her stressing herself or you about it.


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babybird
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18 Mar 2024, 1:57 pm

I used to always wear a German army parka. I don't think anyone really cared. I wish I still had it actually because it was so warm


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blitzkrieg
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18 Mar 2024, 2:47 pm

I have a German inspired username on this forum.

It might give people the wrong idea though, I don't know?

Oh well, there's no changing it anyway.



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20 Mar 2024, 1:11 am

I wear a khaki bucket hat whenever I'm outside. It's a practical thing, I don't want sunburn. I take it off when I go inside stores, other people's houses, etc. No one has ever said anything negative to me about it.

I see nothing wrong with your hat, CockneyRebel. 8)