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velodog
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19 Apr 2008, 5:28 am

Catster2 wrote:
Come on I didn't write this to be abused I am sure you aren't perfect and have made juvenile mistakes before too. I am not stupid I have a college degree but my AS impairs my judgement my psychologist says that. I do thoughtless things all the time and I deeply regret this latest one.


Do you ever envision yourself actually taking responsibility for your actions? Or will you spend the next 50 years pissing all over people around you and saying "-oops! There's my AS acting up again." Psychopathic people almost invariably blame their own destructive behavior on others. So? Are you an Aspie with a bit of Psychopath mixed in? Or are you a Psychopath who is malingering behind the Aspie label? Or do you have such faulty cognitive circuitry in your cerebral cortex that you are seriously mentally incompetent? Do you care to answer any of these questions? I made juvenile mistakes as a juvenile. As an adult I have made adult mistakes. Since you did, what you did, deliberately - it was not a mistake! It was a deliberate course of action. Even now your concern is not the harm that you did to your former friend, but the possible legal ramnifications for youself.



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19 Apr 2008, 5:35 am

velodog wrote:
Catster2 wrote:
Come on I didn't write this to be abused I am sure you aren't perfect and have made juvenile mistakes before too. I am not stupid I have a college degree but my AS impairs my judgement my psychologist says that. I do thoughtless things all the time and I deeply regret this latest one.


Do you ever envision yourself actually taking responsibility for your actions? Or will you spend the next 50 years pissing all over people around you and saying "-oops! There's my AS acting up again." Psychopathic people almost invariably blame their own destructive behavior on others. So? Are you an Aspie with a bit of Psychopath mixed in? Or are you a Psychopath who is malingering behind the Aspie label? Or do you have such faulty cognitive circuitry in your cerebral cortex that you are seriously mentally incompetent? Do you care to answer any of these questions? I made juvenile mistakes as a juvenile. As an adult I have made adult mistakes. Since you did, what you did, deliberately - it was not a mistake! It was a deliberate course of action. Even now your concern is not the harm that you did to your former friend, but the possible legal ramnifications for youself.


Like I said I don't appreciate your abusive tone I am an aspie and aspies have empathy and maturity issues. I AM NOT a f**kup or a psycho. I accept what I did was stupid and I should never have done it, it got out of hanf. I have been a victim all my life of bullying and abuse so I know what it feels like to be on the recieving end. I tryed to make friend with someone who lead me down a bad path that I regret. What is an adult mistake?



velodog
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19 Apr 2008, 6:14 am

Catster2 wrote:
Like I said I don't appreciate your abusive tone I am an aspie and aspies have empathy and maturity issues. I AM NOT a f**** or a psycho. I accept what I did was stupid and I should never have done it, it got out of hanf. I have been a victim all my life of bullying and abuse so I know what it feels like to be on the recieving end. I tryed to make friend with someone who lead me down a bad path that I regret. What is an adult mistake?


1) You accept that what you did was stupid and that it got out of hand. Do you accept that it was inherently wrong for you to do it?

2) You point out that YOU have been a victim. Was your former friend a victim of your abusive conduct?

3) Your bad, bad, bad friend MADE you do something (wrong?). Do YOU have any responsibility in this matter, or is it all the fault of your bad, bad, bad friend?

4) An adult mistake is a mistake made by an adult. Which is what you legally are. Understand?

Everything I am responding to looks to me like a big copout. Will you answer the 4 questions posed to you?



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19 Apr 2008, 7:03 am

velodog wrote:
Catster2 wrote:
Like I said I don't appreciate your abusive tone I am an aspie and aspies have empathy and maturity issues. I AM NOT a f**** or a psycho. I accept what I did was stupid and I should never have done it, it got out of hanf. I have been a victim all my life of bullying and abuse so I know what it feels like to be on the recieving end. I tryed to make friend with someone who lead me down a bad path that I regret. What is an adult mistake?


1) You accept that what you did was stupid and that it got out of hand. Do you accept that it was inherently wrong for you to do it?

*I accept that it was immature, thoughtless and possibly put someone in danger yeah.

2) You point out that YOU have been a victim. Was your former friend a victim of your abusive conduct?

*No she wasn't she was a "victim" of my prank that went wrong

3) Your bad, bad, bad friend MADE you do something (wrong?). Do YOU have any responsibility in this matter, or is it all the fault of your bad, bad, bad friend?

*Of course I have responsibility she put the idea in my head but I did it, I carried through.

4) An adult mistake is a mistake made by an adult. Which is what you legally are. Understand?



Everything I am responding to looks to me like a big copout. Will you answer the 4 questions posed to you?



Last edited by Catster2 on 19 Apr 2008, 9:26 am, edited 1 time in total.

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19 Apr 2008, 7:32 am

Catster2 wrote:
she has emailled me saying that she has called the police (she doesn't know it was me is only guessing)

Why, since a few years have passed, did she think/know it was you?

Have you done anything like this before?



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19 Apr 2008, 7:34 am

Kaleido wrote:
Catster2 wrote:
she has emailled me saying that she has called the police (she doesn't know it was me is only guessing)

Why, since a few years have passed, did she think/know it was you?

Have you done anything like this before?


no but she said I was the only one in her past who she thought had a "grudge" against her. When we broke up I had a few choice words to say as you do when you are angry.



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19 Apr 2008, 8:05 am

Catster2 wrote:
no but she said I was the only one in her past who she thought had a "grudge" against her. When we broke up I had a few choice words to say as you do when you are angry.


So you threatened revenge back then, and now you are trying to lay the blame for your revenge "prank" on you recent friends door. Revenge is a dish best served cold. Poor little Catster2, hers never can tell when hers is a bad widdle girl. :roll:



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19 Apr 2008, 8:09 am

Why, Catster2, have you now twice quoted other people's long messages without addressing any of the points raised in them?

Why have you accused velodog of being "abusive", when all he has done is to express amazement at how insensitive you seem to be.

Your original post states that you set out on this course of action against your former friend with full intention to harm her. In none of your posts have you shown any real sign of remorse over that.

I rather hope she does bring legal action to bear on you. It might impress on you that other people have rights and you have a responsibility to respect those rights. You need to accept the consequences of your own actions.

My only suggestion to you would be that you fully admit to her that you were the culprit, apologise profusely and beg her not to take any further action. (And "beg" is all you are entitled to do.)


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19 Apr 2008, 8:16 am

lau wrote:
Why, Catster2, have you now twice quoted other people's long messages without addressing any of the points raised in them?

Why have you accused velodog of being "abusive", when all he has done is to express amazement at how insensitive you seem to be.

Your original post states that you set out on this course of action against your former friend with full intention to harm her. In none of your posts have you shown any real sign of remorse over that.

I rather hope she does bring legal action to bear on you. It might impress on you that other people have rights and you have a responsibility to respect those rights. You need to accept the consequences of your own actions.

My only suggestion to you would be that you fully admit to her that you were the culprit, apologise profusely and beg her not to take any further action. (And "beg" is all you are entitled to do.)


If you give me specifics I will answer them, I did not have the intention harm her I made that clear ina my original post as I said I only wanted to annoy her NOT A HURT HER. It was a prank gone wrong I didn't threaten her when we broke up but I said some stuff about her that I am not sorry saying. I do accept what I did was immature and stupid I do not howver beleive I deserve to have the cops on my doorstep. It wasn't my idea but I did it I accept that.

You guys aren't being very sympathetic I lost my best friend I had ever had over a stupid white lie. I have been extremely isolated ever since and live on my own with few friends my AS severely impairs my social interaction skills.



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19 Apr 2008, 9:24 am

lau wrote:
Why, Catster2, have you now twice quoted other people's long messages without addressing any of the points raised in them?


I take that back. I find it extremely confusing when someone embeds their edits into a quote. On the two occasions, all I saw was a long post being quoted with apparently no comment from you. I missed the fact that the quote had small bits edited into it.

It might make those two posts clearer if you went back and edited them. All that it would take is to put a [/quote] tag in, before your responses, and a [quote] tag where the original quoted text resumes. Preferably [quote="author's name"], as per the start of the quote. The "Preview" button is your friend!

Bear in mind that you write your post ONCE. Many people (you hope) (try to) read it.


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19 Apr 2008, 9:29 am

lau wrote:
lau wrote:
Why, Catster2, have you now twice quoted other people's long messages without addressing any of the points raised in them?


I take that back. I find it extremely confusing when someone embeds their edits into a quote. On the two occasions, all I saw was a long post being quoted with apparently no comment from you. I missed the fact that the quote had small bits edited into it.

It might make those two posts clearer if you went back and edited them. All that it would take is to put a
tag in, before your responses, and a
Quote:
tag where the original quoted text resumes. Preferably
author's name wrote:
, as per the start of the quote. The "Preview" button is your friend!

Bear in mind that you write your post ONCE. Many people (you hope) (try to) read it.


My responces are in bold now so it is obvious who it came from.



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19 Apr 2008, 9:46 am

Your original post ended with:

Catster2 wrote:
Do people think she has really called the cops or is she just threatening? how should I handle the situation from here?

The first of these questions, I believe we have answered: whether she has called them, or not, is completely irrelevant.

I think everyone has addressed the second question, as well: that you need to express some real remorse.

Did you expect us to tell you it was all OK? Good fun? That "pranks" of this nature are somehow excusable? That you should tell (white?) lies whenever it suits you?

I also fail to understand the logic which has made you break up with the friend who suggested the "prank". Yes, she suggested it. Yes, it was not a good idea. However, she did nothing - you are the one who committed the offence. She did nothing. I don't think a court of law would accept a plea of "Innocent - she made me do it".


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19 Apr 2008, 9:52 am

Catster2 wrote:
My responces are in bold now so it is obvious who it came from.
I didn't suggest that, as it still appears as part of the quoted text, which it isn't. It's hardly any less confusing.

PS. I apologise for being a pedant. However, like I said before, you write your post once, many people try to read it. If they find it confusing, they're just not going to understand what you mean.


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19 Apr 2008, 6:06 pm

lau wrote:
Your original post ended with:
Catster2 wrote:
Do people think she has really called the cops or is she just threatening? how should I handle the situation from here?

The first of these questions, I believe we have answered: whether she has called them, or not, is completely irrelevant.

I think everyone has addressed the second question, as well: that you need to express some real remorse.

Did you expect us to tell you it was all OK? Good fun? That "pranks" of this nature are somehow excusable? That you should tell (white?) lies whenever it suits you?

I also fail to understand the logic which has made you break up with the friend who suggested the "prank". Yes, she suggested it. Yes, it was not a good idea. However, she did nothing - you are the one who committed the offence. She did nothing. I don't think a court of law would accept a plea of "Innocent - she made me do it".


I have told you guys it was stupid and immature no I didn't expect you all to say it was OK but I did expect you as aspies to understand that as aspies we often don't think of the consequences and can be lead. That things we do can spiral out of control quickly. This is why I have told this friend it isn't a good idea to at least hang out for now as she might have another stupid idea. Of course I want to know if she called the cops I have been worried about it ever since although as time goes on I am less worried.

Yes I do as does my family they brought me up think that way to tell a white lie if it gets you out of trouble, gets you what you want or doesn't hurt someone's feelings for example what I did with the Jahaovah's is totally fine. Also under Victorian law it is a defence to criminal activity if your condition (Asperger's) impairs your judgement the cops also can't talk to you unless there is someone else in the interview with you.



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19 Apr 2008, 7:01 pm

Lying is wrong.


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19 Apr 2008, 7:12 pm

lau wrote:
Lying is wrong.
If it is going to save someone's face it is better to tell a white lit IMO than to tell the truth. For example telling the Jahovah's to f**k off would have been far ruder than saying I was a member of another religion. My parents say they are Jewish. Or if you don't feel like going out with someone that night it is better to say you have a headache than telling them the truth.