I feel sick

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Making preparations for my exit. There will be fireworks.

Anxiety is high.

I'm in the same boat m8. Chest tightness and severe anxiety for which I am self medicating with alcohol.

Have you ever had any voices in your head threatening you?

Last edited by Rossall on 12 Feb 2023, 6:13 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Last August you posted "I'm not suicidal", is this still the case?

Also in the same post you wrote "But I'll be in this position for the next 6 months while the gears of government bureaucracy are turning." I'm assuming this is related to what's happening a week on Tuesday.

6 months of this can do a lot to a person.

I was close to somebody in a similar position. Had to wait something like 9 months preparing for the worst which made them ill with worry. Then it turned out they had nothing to worry about.

It's natural to prepare for the worst, but it can reach the point where you stop thinking rationally and convince yourself that the worst possible scenario is the only scenario. Not just the result on the day, but also the fall out from that result.

It's long past expiration.

I was disposed of. Now I'm just rotting garbage in the sun.

Broken marriage? Been there, felt like giving up or doing something crazy but got over it when it was all done and dusted, worked out pretty well after that though I could be facing big problems as a result of being a single parent in the not too distant future. At this stage though, I'm just grateful for having had a decent life on the whole compared to all humans in human history.
Give yourself the opportunity to make it through, you'll make it through.

Root Beer will “get over it,” I believe.

Woke up with anxiety.

Just hours left...

Woke up with anxiety. The end is near.

The time has come.

Is it the big C?

It's not really about "The End" as in “The End of Life."

"At one point Jim (Morrison) said to me (John Densmore) during the recording session, and he was tearful, and he shouted in the studio, 'Does anybody understand me?' And I said yes, I do, and right then and there we got into a long discussion and Jim just kept saying over and over kill the father, f**k the mother, and essentially boils down to this, kill all those things in yourself which are instilled in you and are not of yourself, they are alien concepts which are not yours, they must die. f**k the mother is very basic, and it means get back to essence, what is reality, what is, f**k the mother is very basically mother, mother-birth, real, you can touch it, it's nature, it can't lie to you. So what Jim says at the end of the Oedipus section, which is essentially the same thing that the classic says, kill the alien concepts, get back reality, the end of alien concepts, the beginning of personal concepts."[15]

It's more about a "new beginning" rather than the "killing of the old."

If you want the honest truth: It would be a total waste if one "ceases one's life" willfully. Because that accomplishes absolutely nothing. And young people frequently have a long ways to go in life. And one frequently learns lots owing to what one went through romantically.

Wouldn't have thought he'd feel the need to be so cryptic about his problems if it was exclusively a health concern. Looks like he has a lot more going on, the guy is clearly going through a very rough ride.

Hope that wasn't his last post, or that he's just checked out of this forum on the basis we aren't of much help to him dealing with his issue, or he didn't feel comfortable having it teased out of him.

Sometimes you have to hit rock bottom before you bounce back up again.