You're not alone in the dating disasters. It seems to be the season for it.
I've been watching another friend, similar age, also on the spectrum and his seemingly ill-fated quest for love. I call him the Boy Scout, because he's kind, helpful, and handy. He's tried Match.com, eHarmony, and all that and it just keeps going badly. I thought the divinity school student had a lot of promise. She gave him an STD. (I can't make this stuff up.) The most recent woman was someone the Boy Scout met at school (he's going back for a second degree) and she gave him a really obtuse answer when he asked her out. "I don't like to mix my school and personal life - I prefer to keep those boxes separate." He misinterpreted this to mean that he still had a chance and kept up the pursuit when instead it was code for "no, no, no." He is crushed, pissed at me for telling him that her answer meant no, and generally grouchy again. He hung up on me twice in two days for "sounding judgmental". Deep down, I know he's really lonely and sad. He wants someone to love him, he wants to be needed, and he wants to have a kid. Without that, he feels like he's drifting.
Have some hope. I found my husband at work and I hated him when we first met. He was raised by devout Baptists that most closely resemble Ward and June Cleaver. I'm a witch raised by divorced people and my best friend is gay. Our backgrounds, families, education, all vastly different on paper. Yet he and I are actually very much alike - so much so that people still ask if we are brother and sister. It can take a long time to find that right person and it may be someone who is "all wrong".
Be patient and open and the blessings will come.
In the meantime please don't just leave. Look at the number of people who have responded to your post. The "you" that I see out on other forums is fun and welcoming. To me, you were like a spark in the dark when I first came here. You have made a difference to others, even if it seems small.
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Apologies if I sound judgmental, preachy, dictatorial, offensive or overly rigid. Constructive criticism via PM is welcome.