Rants

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I would love to have supernatural powers, which I would use to destroy all the people who have ever laughed at me and made me feel bad about myself. All those people who have made me have a bad attitude about myself will be sorry, and I would love to of cursed them at the time.

The girl at school who used to call me weird, make up BS stories about me to everyone else and got them to believe her, and hung around with friends in front of me to make me feel more lonely than what I could have been - at the time I wished I made a light above her fall down on her and make her head bleed in front of everyone. f*****g b***h could deserve it.

The girls who bullied me when I was 19, I would love to of brought them bad luck at the time, by making a gang come along and beat them up.

The woman who reported my bus-driver was a b***h too, so I would of made the bus run over her.

And all the girls who have ever pointed me out and laughed at me in public without me doing anything to be laughed at or even noticed, I would use my supernatural powers to make something happen to them that would make everyone else point and laugh at them, like making their trousers fall down, also their underwear. Or I'll use my supernatural powers to make them wet themselves, or want to go wee, so they'll go to the toilet and I will make the door swing open so everyone can see them sitting on the toilet. Or I'll make even worse things happen to them to make them feel humiliated in public. That's for humiliating me.

And whoever be's horrible to the people who are nice to me, the horrible ones will pay for it too. My supernatural powers won't just be to save me, I will use them to save all the lovely people who are nice to me too, who have never humiliated me or mocked me (my family and friends). I will only use my supernatural powers on nasty people who deserve to be punished.

I seriously wish to be kinda loved on these forums and IRL.......... I feel kinda sad ATM.

(This is on another forum, but it still upsets me)

I AM SO LONELY!! !! I suspect that the person I usually talk to is busy with H-word right now (From school, if you don't know what I mean, because I hate that word) and WHY CAN'T ANYONE ONLINE COME AND TALK OR AT LEAST POST IN A GAMES FORUM OR SOMETHING!! !! I am so lonely and upset and I can't wait until I'm back from school tomorrow na dthen i wait for someone to come back from school but what if they don't show up and I get loney again??! !! !!

This friday I twisted my ankle and have been using crutches to walk, and yesterday I went to the hospital to get an x-ray done to see whats wrong. I spent four hours waiting in that hospital and because of that, I missed out on a free workshop lesson about video architechure, of which I was really interested in attending. I really really wanted to go there, but instead I wait in the hospital for four hours, and get told I chipped my bone, and to come back next monday. They also gave me a cast so I cant walk for that entire time. Also on that day I wanted to atleast attend the second free video architechure lessons, but now I cant, I cant and I f*****g hate it.

I've always known that integrity is rare, but this is starting to get ridiculous.
It's supposed to be rare, not practically non-existent.

I wish people would actually start thinking about the crap that they do and the full implications of it.

i am a customer of a company called "telstra". they provide my internet service and my telephone and my cable TV which is called "austar".

there is no other company that services the area where i live with those services, and that is because telstra owns the internet/telephone/ cable TV infrastructure in my area, and they will not let any rival company use it. in other words, i am stuck with telstra, even though they do not personally service (with technicians) my area.

they are a gigantic and very impersonal company that can not resolve the inadequacies of my services.

1. internet. every day, i drop off the internet, and it is more serious than a "cannot not connect to the page you are asking for" error. it is a "thompson gateway" error which means my modem is not responding. when i ring them, (this is a multiple problem because my telephone line is very poor (i have static interference to a degree where i can not determine what people are saying, and they can not determine what i am saying often)), i get routed to the philippines, where telstra has decided to employ their telephone query employees.

they can barely understand what i am saying, and i can barely understand them (due equally to the fact they have very thick accents (and they do not understand my accent either)), and also due to the fact that the static interference on my phone line drowns out the conversation.

they could not care less how disgruntled i am, and they become hostile to me because i am very irate, but i tell them i am not irate with them because it is not their fault, but nevertheless, they could not give a rats ass about my predicament. a rats ass would be more valuable than their attitude to my problem.

they go through a textbook set of questions that they ask me, and i have heard those questions many times before (including the day before), and from experience, i know that the routine they are following will not solve my problem.
i tell them that i had the same problem yesterday and the day before (ad nauseum), but they do not understand me because my particular verbal discourse is not in their bullet point pamphlet of expected responses.

example: (after saying gibberish to the voice recognition system so they have to put me through to a human)

operator: hello my name i sinneal. how can i help you today?
me: (i think "damn. i have reached a phillipino again" )...once again i am disconnected from the internet. every day i have to ring telstra to arduously get my connection restored, and i am sick of this, and if you can not resolve my issue tonight, i am going to have to drive 100 km to a depot tomorrow at 4am and hand deliver the invoices that i usually email to them.

operator: i'm sorry sir for your inconvenience (stock response). can i start with asking you to turn off your modem for 20 seconds, and then switch it back on?

me: this is the routine i have gone through on multiple occasions, and i can assure you it will not work.

op: never the less sir, i must ask you to switch off your modem for 20 seconds and then switch it on again (total ignorance of my assertion that it will not work)

me:ok i have switched it off (huff puff sigh etc).......................... ok i will now switch it back on
op:ok
me: (after 1 minute) hello? are you there?
op: yes sir, i am performing a line check on your connection. please wait 5 minutes.
me: i will have to i guess, but it will only add 5 minutes to my problem.
op: thankyou sir (probably did not understand me)
wait wait wait wait
op: hello sir?
me: yes?
op: your internet connection is working fine now. can you please go into your browser and choose a site to go to?
me: yes but i know what will happen.

wait.. wait...wait

me:it says "thompson gateway error"

op: have you got your modem switched on sir?

me: well if i did not have it switched on, then how could you have determined it was working correctly?

op: i am sorry sir, i just need an answer. have you got your modem switched on.

me: no i am sorry. you just told me you have monitored my modem performance and found it to be OK, so how can you now ask me if i even have it switched on?!?!

op: yes i am sorry, i know that sounds confusing....

me: i am not confused! you are just following your pamphlet guidelines as to what questions to ask, and my problem is not addressed in your pamphlet of "common issues", so can you please think for yourself about the matter or do i just have to hang up and wait until the problem resolves itself as it always does after a few hours?

op: well sir if that is what you wish to do then...

me: NO! i wish you to solve the problem now, because i have a driver that is starting work at 4:30 am which is only 2 hours from now, and i must get in my car now and drive 100 km to hand deliver the invoices if you can not help me.

op: i am sorry sir i can not understand. your modem is working correctly...

me: even though i can not access the internet!! !!?! !

op: i have asked you to tell me if your modem is switched on, and if you are unwilling to tell me that then...

me....yes of course i have the bloody modem switched on!! ! i am not a moron, and you just told me you found that my modem was working correctly, and now you are asking me if it was even switched on?!?!?

op: i am sorry sir but i can not resolve your issue. please ring tomorrow between the hours of 9am to 5 pm.

me: how can i talk to someone who is not an automaton who asks stock questions and does not discount my analytical input into the solution of the.....
op: beep beep beep beep
bugger that!! !!

i was going to write about all three problems (equally inane) but i am now tired and so i will talk about the other 2 in coming days.

i weigh as much as a battleship and i must go to bed and dissolve into sleep (ahhhhhhhh yes)

the world is insane. it is not me who is at fault.

^^^^^

Gina Rinehart is on the matter , with or without her $2 Africans ( she's not going to use Australians their to busy socialising and drinking beers at the pub)

Little old me thought private enterprise was a solution all our problems , the wonders of private monopolies, I'm reminded of that fact the last time I took the "airtrian" to the airport where it cost $18.50 to travel 7 km . I'll do as I do next time and use the regular train and walk 2 km to the airport ($3.50) , even if I was a millionaire I wouldn't pay it , that's obscene !

Fumes, Fires, Smoke, Vapor, gases, particulates, pollution, smog, haze.

I feel upset, annoyed and knackered.

No matter how many years pass, this time of year never seems to get any easier or any less painful.

It's going to be a very long night.

tammy has a friend who is her age (34), and that friend has a boyfriend who she was going to marry but he apparently had a stroke, and tammy knows nothing more than that information. let me start again
tammy rang me earlier tonight to report that her best friend "lisa's" fiancee had possibly had a stroke, and i was not exceptionally interested because i never met him, but tammy sounded disturbed.

me: why do you think it was a stroke?
tam: because they think it may have been a stroke.
me: (deary me) well why did they think it was a stroke then?
tam: i really don't know about that.
me: well ....eerrr what were symptoms?
tam: i don't know.
me: did you ask?
tam: well i will ask next time i talk to her.
me: so your best friend rings you and tells you her fiancee may have had a stroke and you failed to ask her about any details as to what happened?
tam: i'll ask her tomorrow.
me: ok. i want to get back to my game so i will talk to you tomorrow.
tammy: yeah well..it's.....beep beep beep beep (i hung up (she was not rude))

i should care more but she does not care enough either so we agree that we are just as bad as each other.

My ankle hurts from spraining it on Monday. I can't run, and using crutches on campus is such a hassle.

I hate how everything is a @#$%ing game when it comes to me. That's the shortest yet truest rant I'll probably ever post.

Wonderful #@$^#$ facebook "friends".... People who I thought were real-life friends took a post I made and turned it into a feminist rampage filled with personal attacks against me for daring to say something on my mind. I've always been polite in their threads and/or kept my mouth shut entirely, but they come barging into mine with hatred and aggression.

(And no, I didn't say anything actually offensive, other than to ask both sides of the abortion debate to stop and think for a while about what they're arguing for and why. The responses were cruel and self-centered - exactly what I was hoping people would think about and avoid.) *sigh*

As tired as I am, there's no way I'll sleep tonight after that kind of negativity thrown at me by people I gave my time, money and friendship to.

well i do not know what to complain about, but i feel compelled to complain, so i am eager to find fault with something....anything that i can view in a dim manner.
ok. i bought a pair of scissors 15 years ago, and they seem to be finally going blunt. i have to spend more energy to cut things nowadays, and i am not very happy about that.

actually something else i did not like today was that the temperature was not cold enough to put the heater on, and not hot enough to put the air conditioning on. so what the hell should i do?
it costs me twice the amount of electricity in spring time when it is not cold enough to put the heater on and not hot enough to put the air conditioner on.
i must use the air conditioners to counteract the heat of the heaters that counteract the chilly atmosphere caused by the air conditioning. it is a vicious self defeating cycle.