scale of -10 to +10, how do you feel right now?

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-3, physically exhausted and don't know why

4, almost done with the book I'm reading and I found another to add to my stack. Aside from I'm kind of mellow from my xanax, I was having bad feelings earlier now I'm kind of alright.

-3 meh, I'm just a screwed up mental wreck what good can I possibly be to anyone.

-10 if I had a combination of drugs that could kill me I'd be tempted to take them.

8 today

Just took some (prescription) drugz which have increased my misery index from -3 to -1.
Woohoo, better living through chemistry.
Physical exhaustion is also gone but I don't know why. WTF?

-10

-2

+2

-3

Got orbited and stun locked in a MMO battleground, which I really don't like. They did this over and over.

Burnt lunch, and didn't toast the almonds light enough for my mother, who happens to undercook almost everything, so she wasted them all by throwing them in the trash, and insisting they were burnt. That only means I screw another bag of almods for her.

Got to have something else for dinner, after we were looking forward to that chicken and almond dish for a week, and it was rubbery microwave stuff. Went to the store to get twice the almonds, only for the debit card to stop working yet again, and make me out to be the public dumb b***h who scanns for nothing over and over like a moron who steals things! (which f*****g hurts) He seemed like one of those people that feel targeted if you're frustrated, which I very much was at this point! Nobody honestly likes to be the public moron all day.

Got out into the street to go home and got stuck behind an unloaded toe truck that was going 20 MPH under the speed limit, and sticking his butt across both lanes all the way to the next stop light. Forgot my gate key card like a total imbocile, so I had to park, walk all the way past the busy swimming pool, into my apartment, back to the gate, and then into my car. A man in his car was stuck there now, and moved to let me back up to the box. I did, and was out of reach, because my car couldn't turn tight enough backwards. His buddy showed up just in time, to hand him the card, and while I had it right in my fingers, he ran over and opened it. Ouch... .. . . . . . . . f**k you, life! f**k YOU!

Maybe I should watch a "dumb female drivers" video to complete my day! W#%^@&^

-5, damn if only I could play an acoustic guitar....then maybe i could sit on the street and sing and play and get some change to attempt to live on. Well actually if I could find a homeless guitarist to sing with that would be cool...but would they be able to play the songs I can more or less sing? I'm female and all but I like to sing songs from bands like Black Sabbath, Pink Floyd and other random things that where not originally sung by females.

0

I'm running on cranky b***h mode right now.

2 - Nothing too bad happening at the moment. The weather is slightly too hot, but nothing that can't be fixed by taking a shower and walking around the garden a bit. I hope the net has stopped birds from picking my berries. Also, I wonder if these weeds are genetically modified - usually, they don't grow over one and a half metres into the air with spikes.

-5. I think I failed. Why can't I accomplish anything?

Poor blue.

(You've accomplished a lot, so you know.)

I can't even do one subject a semester. What am I going to do with myself and my life?

I think I should try and get a weekend job so I have a bit of extra money maybe (this bar skills course at the community college looks appealing...).