scale of -10 to +10, how do you feel right now?

Post Reply New Topic

^^^It does get easier to accept yourself as you get older.I don't mentally beat myself up near as bad as when I was younger.

It all started when my mom had a heart attack exactly one week ago. She had to be taken to Wheeling Hospital, and she might be back to normal as early as before Thanksgiving (I really hope she does). I was at really low numbers, until I learned hours later that she is stable. Then, we visited her twice, and the number for me would have been, like, a positive 7, but unfortunately today, when we went shopping at Wal-Mart in St. Clairsville, there were some ugly magazines in the check-out we took, and I decided to fix that by flipping the magazines over, but my brother did something stupid by putting his hand on it, and he ended up ripping it, and we got into a fight while I screamed that we refuse to pay for the magazine (because it was one of those pretentious gossip magazines). Thankfully, we didn't pay for the magazine, but I hope we're allowed to go there again because that's where we get the healthy cat food for our beloved cat. Today's events put me at -10 or below at worst, but 5 or 6 at best, as soon as I reach those numbers.

-4. I messed up in my pathetic life (again!).

0 right now

I'm seriously considering quitting my bowling league because A. my bowling skills aren't as good as they used to be, B. one of my teammates keep distracting me and pointing out the obvious like I was born yesterday, and C. it is sometimes scheduled with other events, like a cousin's birthday party. I already had a problem similar to this two weeks ago, so to walk back to the bowling alley again worrying I'll have another meltdown will just upset me, which is why I am considering quitting the league.

-7. I can handle looking at myself and seeing a broken human being. I eat good food, I live indoors, as long as I keep my place I am useful to my family and my husband.

I cannot handle looking at my son and seeing a broken human being. It doesn't matter what they label him with-- broken is broken, even with medication the adult outcomes for ADHD are every bit as bad as the ones for ASD. Broken is broken. I cannot handle the thought of teaching him that he is broken, defective, less, and must be content to exist at the bottom of the heap (he can't even look forward to marrying his way out of the gutter-- that only works for pretty girls).

What was I ever thinking?? How could I have ever thought it wouldn't be that big a deal if one of my kids got it?? How could I ever have thought that I turned out OK and they would too??

8.

-8 I'm starting to realize how worthless I am

-4. Anxious and a little scared. I did something stoopid. Gawd, everyone at work is gonna hate me.

About a 6. I am feeling alright, just bored-ish.

_________________
LIONS-STAMPEDERS-ELKS-ROUGHRIDERS-BLUE BOMBERS-TIGER-CATS-ARGONAUTS-REDBLACKS-ALOUETTES

The Canadian Football League - What We're Made Of

Feel free to talk to me, if you wish.

Every day is a gift- cherish it!

"A true, true friend helps a friend in need."

8. Everyone's been really nice to me today - just one of those days where everything works out.

about +3

5.

-3. Depression is just around the corner I think. Everything just wants to go wrong suddenly. I was hoping that things would start getting better, not worse. When I try, things just get worse. Now it's starting to get too bad which means that depression will come along pretty soon.

-4

6.

+ 1