scale of -10 to +10, how do you feel right now?

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-5 tired of being sick everyday and doctors doing f**k all to help. I am also fed up with all their BS excuses.

I will crawl out of this apathy that I have forced myself to adopt and accept.

I will crawl out of this apathy that I have forced myself to adopt and accept.

I will crawl out of this apathy that I have forced myself to adopt and accept.

This is not good for my family. This is not good for my husband. This is not good for me.

It might be easy, and relatively friction-free, but it is not healthy, it is not sane.

I have three daughters. I will not model this as correct womanly behavior.

I have one son. I will not model this as correct womanly behavior.

I will crawl out of this apathy that I have forced myself to adopt and accept.

-32767. I almost got in the middle of a fight. I had a hell of a time shutting down both parties. The fight was about money, which both parties owe me. While this is all under the table, I'm ready to tell both parties where to get off.

2.5

0

All around me are familiar faces
Worn out places, worn out faces
Bright and early for their daily races
Going nowhere, going nowhere
Their tears are filling up their glasses
No expression, no expression
Hide my head I want to drown my sorrow
No tomorrow, no tomorrow

And I find it kinda funny, I find it kinda sad
The dreams in which I'm dying are the best I've ever had
I find it hard to tell you, I find it hard to take
When people run in circles it's a very very
mad world mad world

Children waiting for the day they feel good
Happy birthday, happy birthday
Made to feel the way that every child should
Sit and listen, sit and listen
Went to school and I was very nervous
No one knew me, no one knew me
Hello teacher tell me what's my lesson
Look right through me, look right through me

And I find it kinda funny, I find it kinda sad
The dreams in which I'm dying are the best I've ever had
I find it hard to tell you, I find it hard to take
When people run in circles it's a very very
Mad world, world
Enlarge your world
Mad world

-6

I am having a hell of a time resisting the urge to buy a bottle of whiskey

13 years 5 months until my youngest child attains majority, and I can die.

I wish I hadn't taught them all to identify hemlock. They would never believe I would consume it accidentally.

It hit me,

I fought it and it hit me,

-10

Cry with me please me,

Why is life so cold?

Damn it, it sucked, every part of it sucked and now I am alone with dying family members with nothing.

Just cry with me please,

Why? Why is life broken?

The wall are collapsing on my chest, its some F-ed up s**t, its one of those moment that I look at the picture from the outside and its masterpiece of death. This is some Stephen King s**t, its artfully f****d, pain from every angle from every one involved.

(((dcj))) thanks for posting that song. with the music, i recognize it and like it.

Life is good again

but I still have conversations I am not looking forward to today

2

3 I have today off and I feel like crap. I just hope I'm not coming down with the same thing the kids at work have.

-7

I don't feel like I have a purpose. I don't have anything. There's nothing I really live for anymore. I'm not even sure why I'm still trudging along.

3.

My mothers anger these last few days are just getting too much for me. it's making me unhappy and agitated, i just want to avoid my whole family and be left alone today. X(