Dear "You"...From "Me"-Letters Unsent

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Dear .....

I'm still confused.

Me

Dear 'Problem seeker' using this term instead of another one I could drum up. Stop harassing me on the forums stop stalking me in my threads and grow up so you can move on from your unwanted baggage. Pain only inflicts the beholder, deal with it now, or else find yourself staring out at the doll queue with nobody supporting you on your behalf. Because that's what it will be like from now on-- glow

Dear you,

That better not have been directed at me.

smudge.

Dear Me, From Me

You know life is hard right now with you facing homelessness. You also know your chances of going back to your drugging ways is high. My advice for you at this time is to sleep and try to put these troubles aside. They won't last. Yes, the end is near, so just have a drink and wait.

Dear Loser, Your self indulgent-pity is driving me insane. Cut your losses now, in order to do that, you must first stop making up more and more lies about me, wishing I was yours etc, trying to have me thrown off etc, because your lies are just another sad part of your failure to stand up and be a man. Conquer your own demons, I won't tolerate your s**t anymore. (and if you going to moan, do it in a reasonable way.) That's all I will ask. From, an indigenous young woman.

^ did you mean indignant?

Dear Saint Alan,

Why in the world did you leave me halfway through this adventure of child-rearing?? I know I shouldn't be upset-- it's not like you had a choice in the matter. If I ever wondered (I didn't-- I know, if you were going to kill yourself, you would have finished the dishes and let the dog out first), the coroner's report made the fact that you died a natural death quite clear.

I'm just SCARED. I want my DADDY. Now I'm the Asperger parent raising the Asperger kid, and I really wish you were around to relate to. I wish, profoundly, that I could call you up on the telephone and ask you questions. One Grandma has permanent rose-colored glasses, the other Grandma is completely senile, and your sister didn't think about it enough to remember just exactly WHAT you guys did.

People haven't even gotten around to writing books about raising ASD kids specifically for ASD parents. Lots of them think it's impossible. You guys did it, and you did a pretty darn good job, before anyone even knew it was a subject for study. You really were amazing, and ahead of your time. I wish you were here so I could tell you that.

I wish that Young Mister Edison was going to benefit from having you for a role model. Yeah, I know-- "If wishes were fishes, we'd all cast nets." Mom used to get so flustered when we'd sit there and talk about plans and wishes... Jeez, I'd give my right arm for a cup of coffee with you guys right now. No s**t Sherlock.

Oh, well. Such is life. I reckon you taught me enough common sense that I'll figure it out. That doesn't make me miss you any less right now.

Love,
Boo

Dear fellow library patron,

Please wrap it up with the book, and return it. It's not like it's War and Peace.

Impatiently yours,

Dear friends,

Do you always have to be late?

Dear me,

What the hell were you doing? Urgh, for God's sake.

URGH. Slap yourself.

Harder.

- Me.

^ I've just realised, that sounds kinda funny if you say it out loud.

Slap me! URGH! Harder!! !

Anyway.

Dear anonymous

I sat there the other week, and as soon as you went to the bathroom, P started singing your praises as to what a decent, genuine and good guy you are. As I sat there listening to him but not saying anything, I could tell he was telling me because he really believes it, not just because he is your friend. I know he would not have done the same for any if the others except the two I already trust. But he could also sense how hesitant I was about you. C was silent because she knew what I was thinking and she can see why too.

Being a good guy and a genuine person is not enough. You haven't got your s**t together, you're not committed to anything and you don't have a purpose or any direction. You haven't learned what respect is yet - or trust. And these are general life skills. How do you expect to be able to have a relationship when you have so much work to do yet is beyond me. Go back to f*cking girls and having ficantes. That's all you're going to be able to do until you do some serious work on yourself.

Words don't change anything. Actions say everything.

Dear You Two

I really want to be friends with you. I like the banter. I like that you take me out of myself - in a fun way.

I wish you felt the same way. I wish there wasn't any awkwardness. If you were foreign, we would have had "that conversation" ages ago, it would have became a non-issue and things would have been a lot more relaxed. But I guess you can't help being who you are and I can't help being who I am.

Still, I care about you a lot and enjoy your company.

Thanks for all the laughs.

Dear Mom,

Happy birthday. I love you. I miss you. If I had known it would end this way, I wouldn't have put you through all the trouble of learning to let yourself love us.

Happy birthday. I will always love you. I miss you more than ever.

Love,
Daughter

Dear best friend,

I will never be able to express how much you mean to me. I wish we could spend more time together, or that you would at least call me or make some effort to communicate with me more than 30 minutes a week.

I love you. I love you more as a best friend than I ever would have as a girlfriend. You make me smile. You make me want to be happy. I just wish you would stay in one place long enough for me to tell you this.

Dear b***h teammate in my bowling league,

Why do you insist on giving me orders when I know what I'm doing? You do not need to tell me that it is my turn to bowl when I already know this; I was not born yesterday. Also, you were very harsh in tone when you told me to pick up my jacket when it fell to the floor. I can't stand being on the same team as you because you are annoying and tend to break my concentration. From now on, when we bowl together, you don't talk to me, and I don't talk to you. Capiche?

-Me