1,001 Ways to Cheer Yourself Up

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42. Promply be a callous soul and switch the channel to Family Guy.

43. After Family Guy, stage a mock Jedi battle using yardsticks as substitute lightsabers.

44. Clean up broken yardsticks and pull splinters out of your body.

45. Look at those splinters under a high powered microscope.

46. Then switch tv to Jerry Springer see loser worst than me.

47. While watching Springer, cheer on the lesbian partners who abuse their adopted children in their eternal struggle against the alcoholic Klansmen who just love stuffed animals.

48. Secretly hope this event sparks a riot.

49. Yell Jerry! Jerry! Jerry! as half naked people are carried away by steve.
50. Write a song chorus "my dog likes to eat mary-wann-a"
"my dog likes to eat mary-wann-a"

51. He offered the cat a bit of ganja
But the cat said-a he no wanna.
Try a bit o' mary-wann-a

52 Song writer laughs so hard goes to guitar solo.

53. Listen to good guitar solos.

54. Try to spot palindromes, such as solos and racecar

55. the dog say hey redivider yo
bag of mary-wann-a I wanna
eat more mary-wann-a

56. The cat say no, doggie, no
I no wanna
try-a the mary-wann-a

The cat he stay hip
and give the doggie the slip
chillin with a pipe full o' catnip

57. Sit and listen to music written by a songwriter with actual talent.

58. the dog say hey I wanna
dance with a cool cat.
the cat say hey I wanna
dance with a dog on
mary-wann-a

59. Cool cat got to dancin'
And hot dog got to prancin'
The cat shimmied so sweet,
But dog stepped on his feet
Hot dog ran for the door,
but the cat tossed him to the floor.

60. Plan an intervention for TheMachine1 concerning his unhealthy obsession with mary-wann-a

61. Have a strong cup of coffee

62. Find a silent place and run as hard as you can and flap your arms like flying and scream too. (Make sure nobody sees you, for you probably don't feel happy anymore then. Tip: find a child to go with you, people won't find it inapropriate anymore if you do this together with a child)

63. Renew search for quiet place after being released from jail for causing a public disturbance.

64) the dog an cat on the floor they sat.
cat say hey dog do you want to eat
a p**** cat.

65. Buying a big spa bath so I can fit everybody in.

66. Finding the right house to fit the spa bath.

(can you tell I'm house shopping at the moment?)