Why do people on this forum always side with women?

Post Reply New Topic

But I can't. I'm too too too too too too too too shy, and I can't read people, and u like dating sites women don't walk around with w sign say ping "I'm single" the few times I've meet and thought women liked me in person all turned out to be super wrong then created bad situations for me.

There's no single groups, dating meet ups,dating services, or speed dating here.

Those who have had bad experiences with men will likely side with men and those with bad experiences with men will likely side with women, all other factors being taken equally.

One thing a man is not allowed to express is "I am hurt because I was rejected." Instead anger or jealousy is usually the response.

Just be yourself. If someone likes you for who you are then you get lucky. Otherwise, it's not really your fault - ti's just not a good match. It's probably better being single anyway.

I don't know if it's an assumption, or just what is gathered from the text. Text doesn't have tone, so one is left with inference and interpretation (often literal). The assessment of a statement as generalized, i think, is further likely when it contains a generalized word like 'always'.

E.g. : Why do people on this forum always side with women?
Reads to me:
Why do [the/all] people on this forum always side with women?
(Hence my question)

Whereas, the question:
Why do a few people here seem to always side with women?
Or
I feel like some people here always side with women.

I would interpret as a few or some people. Based on replies here of "i don't do that", i'm guessing i'm not the only one who read it that way. So, it's probably words used plus literal readers..


As for the feelings, i haven't seen what you're describing other than katy. But as i read it, i may well be one of the people you feel is doing this.

I have however seen a lot of people trying to help and offering suggestions

If the question is 'why will no girl go ever out with me?' versus 'why won't sheila go out with me?' - though both versions are attempting to help and be supportive, the suggestions offered will naturally have a different focus (i.e. with the former, is there something about the poster that is creating a perception, or something they can do to change the situaton - such as, in another post, someone said no girls would have anything to do with them and listed a few things, and mentioned they get completely over-obsessed with a girl - so this issue became the focus; whereas with the latter, the responses will be more focused on sheila, her not being the right one, her missing out, etc).

This may not be what you're referring to and i'm completely misinterpreting. My interpretation is that it's not about supporting a woman who won't go out with you because she's also a woman, while picking on you because you're a guy.. It's that the original questions are that joe (or lucy) has a repeated situation/issue in which the only commonality is joe (or lucy), so what can (s)he do to alter it.

I think it's a really good idea to forget those kinds of things for meeting women. It would probably work better to sign up for a free class in something that you are interested in, or an inexpensive class, or to join some sort of group that meets to discuss interests. You'd be much more likely to find a girl that shares your interests and would at least have a chance to see and get to know you before outright rejection.

Unfortunately, NTs are often fake. They will pretend to be enjoying themselves, or pretend that nothing's wrong to avoid awkwardness or confrontation.

It's really the same problem that I've had with job interviews. They aren't going to say "Well, there's no way we're going to hire you"; they're going to smile and say "We'll call you and let you know in a few days" and pretend that everything went smoothly. And they have no intention of calling; they want to avoid conflict. So they give small hints and have little indications that things aren't going well, which other NTs are supposed to pick up on. But those with ASD often miss the signals.

The city conjured to mine, which is the 3rd largest in my state, doesn't have classes and such unless you go to the college and then your looking at thousands of dollars because of all the fees.

All my interests are male dominated interests
My money situation has got tight. I only have $20 a month now of extra money.

Don't think about dating and rejection as an evaluation of you as a human being. Sometimes (a lot of times) things just don't work, like trying to plug a USB cable into a power outlet. Forcing things won't make them better, and it's a waste of time and energy to complain and blame it on women. You'll find someone you're compatible with, just have patience, and do something fun in the meantime.

Why do some people who can't get dates blame only other people?

How do you not when your rejected for the same reason by thousands of women?


Been patient for 17 years. I only have two years left. Times running out if it hasn't already. And women only get more picky as they get older, so more and more women will demand a guy makes good money in order to date them.

I wouldn't say all the women here automatically side with other women, I think some recent postings speak to that(and as far as politics go it seems like there have been quite a few conservative women of varying degrees that have posted on PPR over time) but dude there is no point in being upset since it doesn't solve anything regardless.

With the anxiety issues I have along with the AS I just don't see any relationships on the horizon, I feel like my self esteem isn't in a good place and that is probably what I have to fix which you know somewhat of a catch 22 since your so low because the difficulties in socializing so how do you fix that? It's a slow process that I'm struggling with, I'm trying to go to school and maybe get a job but it's tough doing it all alone and I'm so afraid of failing. As much as I would like to be in relationship, to have a connection like connection like that with someone else, but I just don't think I'm equipped to do it at this time realistically. You gotta learn something nobody teach you, I have to change how I feel about a lot of things and even then I don't know what chances of success I have. I hate pressure, I can't live under it, I inevitably fall apart, I'm my own worse critic so I just don't try to think about these things while jumping thru the hoops I got to jump thru to hopefully one day be an "independent adult".

There is no point being angry at humans for acting human as sh***y as that may be, what else can you expect? When I take stalk of myself I don't see much of a catch either(height, money, car, job, social network, whatever) certainly not one that can just sit quietly and not speak to anyone and expect anything to happen. The the saying 'all men are created equal' is just nonsense, it couldn't further from the truth and it's not fair but this planet sucks and it's always been that way and always will. Now I have much more of an aversion and fear of rejection, I don't even get to that point so I'm sorry you've put yourself thru all this.

It's a cruel disability dude...

Last edited by Jacoby on 18 Feb 2016, 5:19 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Rejection is down to preference mostly. Nearly everyone is picky.

I think I sort of misunderstood...I thought you were saying you think all women are all perfect angels who can do no wrong, but rather disagree with that attitude. That said though I am still a bit confused how posters on here always side with women....I mean maybe some do but but I've certainly observed plenty of cases where women are not being sided with.

Also I think its very immature what those feminists are doing, trying to shame women into voting for Hillary...I figure the Hillary campaign encourages it to, because she's a dirty dirty politician. I suppose men who vote Bernie over Hillary are sexist to....

It's not about how much you make, but how you represent yourself. If you see yourself as "the guy who doesn't make enough", then people will see this and treat you as such, and enforce your self image. Try to do something fun. Have a hobby. And then try to identify with that side of you. Have a positive self-image, and people will treat you differently.

Why are you saying that you only have two years left, by the way?

being superficial isn't mean. it's human. we all are superficial, men and women alike, weather or not we like to admit it. there's no double standard, there's no being mean, that's how it is.

people have to respond to that with "stop being so hard on yourself" because that's the only answer. the way men are judged are by their confidence, and with this defeatist why me attitude, why didn't she see how good i am attitude, you're going to continue to experience it. you really don't understand, women HATE that s**t, passionately. and when you display such non-confidence to someone, as a man, you're basically portraying yourself to her as what a man would perceive rosie o'donnell. in a perfect world, there'd be a magic switch to turn off self esteem and confidence issues. we'd all be happy people that get along with everyone. but, we don't live in that world, and that world sure will never exist in dating. so you really only have the option of learning from these experiences and trying to become a better person, or you can just keep complaining about the same thing over and over again. i'm sorry dude, that's just how it is. dating isn't fair. i'm not even saying all this to belittle you or make you feel inferior, i'm right there with you. i'm 26, i'd like to think i'm a good person, i have a good job, none of it matters because i have absolutely no confidence whatsoever, and thus, i'm not exactly about to find someone.

as far as why people side with women.. i don't really see it. the things they write about are entirely different here. men have trouble just finding a second date, women have trouble finding a guy who wants her for something other than sex. when a women loses interest she just moves on, a guy will lead her on. it's an entirely different attitude and it's a little justified.

It is when you not allowed to talk to them until you make a certain ammount. So unless I lie to them it is. Even the they'll find out real fast when I can't take them out to eat or do stuff.

Non of this has to do with positive self image or how people treat me, none of that is seen in online dating, which is modern dating. Women have a demand list and you either meet it or you don't, no ammount of seeing things positive will make up for you not having those things on the list.

i agree and disagree. i think that an ongoing 'woe is me' or 'life is forever hopeless' is not appealing to Anyone - male or female. it's not just that a woman sees you as weak or girlish, it's that it's emotionally draining to be around and for better or worse, when dating (and perhaps even in the beginning of friendships), the convictions we hold are what we exude and are what people initially respond to.

someone okay with themselves - or even somewhat self-conscious, but accepting of their lot in life and just trying to learn from things and keep going - there seems an almost subconscious thought that 'that person is okay; worth meeting'. while someone completely embedded in self-defeat and why me (whether they say 'nobody will ever like me' out loud or not is irrelevant), people pick up on that and there seems a response of 'nobody likes them, there must be a reason for that; stay away'.


i think the very fact that you recognize this and recognize that all you can do is learn from it and try to improve yourself means that even if for whatever reason your confidence is low, your underlying attitude is good which gives you have a very good shot at finding a meaningful relationship.

Last edited by 100000fireflies on 19 Feb 2016, 3:26 pm, edited 1 time in total.

The only thing I can say is you are saying some things that just aren't factual. I know men who make minimum wage yet have a girlfriend. I'm sorry, but the people who have a problem with you because of THAT are SNOBS. Ignore the people on this forum who defend that kind of attitude as they will only bring you down more. You need to look for the right kind of people. They are the minority. 80-90% of people suck. That's the cold hard truth.

I do see a pattern where people like to kick those who are already hard on themselves. I find it quite disgusting. It's hard to tell if they actually believe they are helping or if they just like the feel of being able to draw blood from someone they perceive as in a weaker position than themselves. But unfortunately, the more you complain the more you draw their attention.