What triggered your most horrible depression?

Post Reply New Topic

Learning of my grandparents' homicide/ suicide...
It's still recent,
so I'm still a tad bit blue,

um... NO. sorry Ana, but this is a horrible question and just reading the title of the post made me feel like crap, so i'm not going to actually dredge up the memories right now. i need to go find my Sagira now...

For me, it was being in an abusive marriage, even though my ex never beat me, the emotional abuse was what triggered the depression. It wasn't until I got the courage to divorce him with the help of my therapist that the depression eventually went away.

In my case, I don't really know what triggered my depression, but I know it is at least partially due to anxiety and a low self-esteem, plus being forced to do things I hate.

I'd have to say a certain lesson plan in grade school drove me insane the most. Though I feel like I might begin spiraling downward soon considering how many a-holes there are at my school who like to piss me off....

My worst was a downward spiral trigged by the psychologist I had been seeing since I was a kid. She told me that I would be depressed for life, and that I should try to be like everyone else instead of resisting against the culture.
I stopped seeing her, but it just got worse and worse, I couldn't deal with school anymore even though I was getting good grades. I felt so alone, like no one understood me, but being like everyone else didn't help me, it only made the pain that much worse.
One thing that helped me break out was realizing what I was here for and that I didn't need to be concerned at all about what other people thought of me. I always did the bare minimum that I had to. I just could not handle school and all homework I was supposed to do.

A year and a half or so ago I plunged into depression again, mostly because of my husband and his job that he was emotionally abused at. He was told by his boss “Why can't you be like everyone else?” and then he took another job that didn't pay enough for us to continue to live on. But I got him off that track, but in the meantime I had all kinds of issues, I thought it was just me being autistic, but now I realize that it was probably too much empathy and a guilt trip for not being what my parents wanted me to be.

Two words. High School. I'm going no further than that. I'm actually much more happier today since I graduated from that hell hole.

I always felt different from other people. In sixth grade I really started wondering why. I settled on the explanation that I was lesbian. People in school called me a lesbian, and my mother's lesbian friend spoke of an overwhelming feeling of being different from a very early age. his plunged me into a black closeted-"gay"-teenager depression that lasted for a year and produced "aftershocks" for another 18 months.

I had severe delusions of persecution, outrageous fantasies of martyrdom, festering rage, and near-catatonic episodes of self-pity, all connected to the false conviction that I was growing up gay in tennessee. It became the explanation for my every AS symptom: Fear of social situations became fear of being outed, stims and clumsiness outward manifestations of my inner sexual freakishness, and general inability to connect with others- they must have known my sectret and were shunning me! I stopped grooming, wrote some godawful poetry, and cried in public.

It was so dramatic and bad that my mother homeschooled me for two entire grades afterward. One of those years was basically spent decompressing from my monstrous depression.The next year I began to show signs of a beautiful recovery. I read voraciously and acquired powers of reflection and a theory of mind. I stopped believing I was gay and stopped going to liberal blogs . Things like having conversations were within my grasp, because I had become more relaxed.

Five years later, I learned that my mother had been trying to get me diagnosed with AS since I was four, but my father refused to believe that anything was wrong. Gee, thanks, dad.

When I realized that I'll be alone for the rest of my life. About 2 or 3 years ago now. So if someone has a solution for that let me know.

money.

I think I might've naturally had depression since I was young. Cause it's funny when I watch cartoons I liked as a child, I'll be like "Wow, that was really depressing." It's like, The Lorax was one I can think of. Not exactly a happy cartoon, lol.

Oh and then there was this Little Audrey one, where she shot a bird, and they had this whole funeral in the forest for the bird and all the animals attended it and were crying. Little Audrey was feeling all guilty, and I think in the end the bird came back to life. I don't really see how a cartoon like that could be appropriate for kids at all. Then again, it's kind of like how can you see Bambi as appropriate for kids? I think the first Care Bear film also was rather melodramatic.