Verbal Communications Differences and Difficulties Sticky

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does anybody else ever hit themselves to get somebody's attention when you forget to use your words? I put my hand(s) into fists and the sound of it gets someone's attention. I don't do it often and it's kind of embarrassing, but I do it without much thinking so it's just natural. When I was younger I would just stand there without moving and when the person finally saw me they would sometimes be scared because they didn't realize my presence. But I don't seem to always have that patience anymore.

Hello is nice to say but I think I'm exhausting it's usage.

I don't have a great deal to say thoug, hoping any & all are able to find some means of serenity in his/her life...

I propose we change the name of this *sticky* (ahem): Here's why, and I'll post an excerpt of what I just PM'd to another:


".............The 'special silent forum' (e.g. nonverbal) *sticky* in the Haven is stagnate and members say the title is misleading, so they consequently do not post in this forum. Yet this forum is so relevant to virtually all on the spectrum! I am a diagnosed Aspie and yet can have times of near muteness and so do plenty of others; one of our triad of impairments is communication, specifically social/verbal communication. Even those chatty Aspies can have real difficulities with communicating verbally to others.

I actually had one member send me a PM, saying that she'd like to post in the 'nonverbal' forum, as she has plenty of trouble verbal communicating, but she does not because "it does not apply to her" (but it does). So the title needs to be changed to better accomodate all of our members. One NV regular said she almost does not post there anymore because no one else does. Understandable.

I suggest the title to this *sticky* forum be changed to be more palatable to our members. How about 'verbal communication differences' or something related? I'd really encourage members to post so they may express themselves regarding communication from an AS perspective and share ideas............"

BBC had aired a programme about selective mutism, especially in children. However, there's no mention about those who are on the spectrum with selective mutism! That's a missing piece and what our WP members express so well. I can (and do) speak more now - - (finally) but it can be awkward. One difference is that, in the programme mentioned above, the sometimes-mute individuals said they were "embarrassed" or just shy. OK, but the dynamics change if one is an Aspie in that there are times when we physically may be unable to speak! It's happened to me.

Anyhow, I hope everyone on the Wrong Planet can post here.

Yes, I agree LabPet as, there is a great many people whom do have verbal difficulties each unique from one person to another.
Honestly, I may be seen as being very communcative due to the fact, that I tend to post a great deal yet, there are times when I truly have wanted to say things, but A- find it difficult to do so or B- Feel whatever I say would simply go un-noticed.
I have no problems with there being a change of the name of this particular sticky since, I don't feel so minor here...



ProfessorX

Verbal difficulty forum.

Title changed on request of OP. Is this more to your satisfaction?

Mwah! Quartermass.

Uhhh, Quatermass. No quarter. Sorry, source of irritation, that.

Hope this title is more to your liking, y'all.

hmm...much more appropriate than my "old" responses were... I have a similar issue but, i always just figured it was because i didn't care much for the topic of conversation. a lot of times now i just make a fart noise and walk away. I noticed and have pointed out to my wife that i am much more adept when writing and messaging online as well. I have the prosody issue that's not a rquirement but, common enough, that i pause in odd placement mid sentence and such. I fluctuate between being quite verbose and fairly clammed up. Part of my problem is i want to be accepted but, i don't want to compromise myself or interests to do so and if what i'm interested in isn't topic i bow out most times because...i don't care about the subject.There are times when i worry a bit about my impression on people.

This is going to be interesting...

Thanks Quatermass - I appreciate

Now we ought to be able to lure more of us

This thread has helped me alot,
Mostly becouse I can relate so much to muteness so I've been reading it while having my mute episodes and that made me feel safe in a way.

I've never understod why most people thought people who didn't talk where less intellegent as I have always thought it was the other way around; when you don't occupy your mind with remembering what you are alowed to say to whom and where and how you can insted think freely and philosophize deeper.

I did not have a speach delay and I can be very loquacious but most of what I say is ecolalia in different ways, but I also get overwhelmed by it so I have had a couple of days each month when I don't talk at all.
I had a major meltdown 4 months ago that left me unable to speak and understand what others said to me for about a week and since then those completly non-verbal days has incresed with 400% and I don't talk as much as I used to on the other days either.

(sorry if my grammar/spelling is bad, I'm having a bad day)

27315, I am sorry you are having so much stress right now. I hope life calms down for you.

Just an observation: Of course us Aspies verbally communicate - I can and do, more now as I've 'acclimated' a bit. Without specifics, I met with a friend (PhD student like myself)......just expressions that, hypothetically, non-verbal speech would be advantageous.

Certainly a facet is that we are rather 'out of our element' in this NT verbal communication world. Irrespective of the fact that any given Aspie is, say, a public speaker or related. We do assimilate. I know this thread is applicable to most all. In confidence, for myself, speech is as if a 2nd language.

I have found this thread to be both insightul & helpful even if I might appear not to belong here.
Still, I'll admit that I'm not the greatest when it comes to speaking verbal or written since, in other people's eyes I appear to be of lower intellect.Anyways,I'm still here in this thread..

I think I do it more out of frustration. I have words I want to speak, but nothing comes and if I need to get someone's attention and cannot, I occasionally go into spaz mode and swat myself in the thighs.

I would like to contribute more, but I am just coming out of 'hide mode' and I am not doing so well with communicating currently.