Rants

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The same pattern seems to keep happening to me. I wish I could get some answers so that I could try to fix it or prevent it. I try to learn from my mistakes, but it doesn't seem to prevent it. Even when I'm extra careful and I feel like I can trust that it won't happen, it still does. It makes me feel so hurt and confused. I don't know what to do about it. I almost feel like I just can't trust anyone and no one really cares about me. What makes it worse is that I'm not even sure when these things are happening and then I get paranoid about it. It's so stressful and I wish I could get an answer.

Still waiting. Seriously pissed.

I'd be calling whatever licensing agency is involved with this service, and complain loud and long about the p!ss poor service these people are providing.

Unfortunately, these people are a commercial fire sprinkler company licensed by the state of California and to get any assistance from those clones is even more frustrating then from the company. Plus, I am representing my church on this, so I can't even allow myself the luxury of giving them both barrels. On top of that, I am not comfortable talking to strangers, even over the phone, so I have a tendency to put it off.

Unfortunately, these people are a commercial fire sprinkler company licensed by the state of California and to get any assistance from those clones is even more frustrating then from the company. Plus, I am representing my church on this, so I can't even allow myself the luxury of giving them both barrels. On top of that, I am not comfortable talking to strangers, even over the phone, so I have a tendency to put it off.

Have you tried calling the local fire district or fire company on who to call to file a complaint?

I suck. I suck. I suck. I suck. I suck. I suck. I suck. I suck. I suck. I suck. I suck. I suck. I suck. I suck. I suck. I suck. I suck. I suck. I suck. I suck. I suck. I suck. I suck. I suck. I suck. I suck. I suck. I suck. I suck. I suck. I suck. I suck. I suck. I suck. I suck. I suck. I suck. I suck. I suck. I suck. I suck. I suck. I suck. I suck. I suck. I suck.

It feels like I just keep going in circles. I just don't know what to do about it. I just wish I could get an answer to why it keeps happening. I try to be careful, I try to learn from my mistakes, I try to make an effort and it still keeps happening. It's just so confusing and frustrating. Sometimes it feels like I can't just get treated like an equal. I just can't seem to find someone I can relate to and it seems like the people that do hang out with me only do it because they feel like they should and not because they really want to. I really hate to feel like a burden. It seems like in almost every situation I'm in people either feel sorry for me or target and I get so, so sick of it. I try to be friendly and confident. I'm independent around these people. It wouldn't bother me much if it was just once in a while, but these things seem to happen all the time. I try to make an effort and do something about it, but it still happens.

I really wish I didn't feel disconnected to so much, but at the same time I'm glad I'm not. I don't understand this whole "popularity" thing and it just weirds me out if I find out someone was even thinking about me. Why would someone think about me? I'm a nobody, I'm just me. Like with compliments, I just don't get it. Don't compliment me, I'm just doing what I can. How can anyone even tell if they're popular? Who wants to be popular and why?

I've seen what happens when people become popular. They change, and not for the better. They change and they toss you in the dirt the instant you're of no use to them. They don't care about the little people, just adoring fans to worship at their feet, or their precious echo chamber so that they can feel safe away from dissenting voices that threaten their beliefs. And what bully wants to be threatened? They react with violence.

Let me fade away into nothing, let me be forgotten. Just so long as I have helped make people's lives better, so long as I help others not feel the darkness I have known, what else matters?
Just let me sleep and be forgotten.

Fml

Broadband is down and I'm all alone.. suppose that's better than the recurrent illnesses I've been having all summer.

A great idea! Such a shame I only discovered this thread now, but never mind; better late than never.

What really annoys me more than anything else at the moment is a particular person I happen to work as a volunteer for, a person who seems to think she is some kind of wise expert on the subject of Asperger's Syndrome simply because she happens to personally know many people who are on the proverbial spectrum. A know-it-all who likes to give me condescending advice that I can't seriously accept. For example, 'Have you thought of joining a social group for Aspies?' A social group?! I suppose her advice to a vampire would be to go get a tan. So utterly clueless this woman is, so shockingly ignorant.

Rant Number 2.

I'm guessing there are no limits to the number of responses we can give here, so I'll talk about something else that also annoys me - being the way I am.

Yes, I know it's all the rage now to be 'non-judgmental', 'accepting of difference' and all of that, but I just can't be. I'm intolerant and judgmental by nature, so if I accept the advice to be accepting and non-judgmental then I have to go on being intolerant and judgmental, which... well, it's kind of self-defeating, in an Epimenides kind of way (you know, about 'all Cretans being liars' - Google it).

I don't want to be autistic, or have autism, Asperger's Syndrome or whatever or however you say it. It stinks, it sucks, on so many levels that I don't even know quite where to start here. People say things like, 'But if you were like most other people you wouldn't be X' (ex. smart, or 'unique', or whatever else they have in mind), but to this I say, 'You cannot possibly know this for sure'. I believe I would, among other things, be a better person if only because I would not be so honest with others to the point of being abrasive and callous, and because of this I would actually have friends and more likely than not a permanent job or career. I wouldn't be the kind of person that others want to avoid, and that could only ever be a GOOD thing.

Okay, rant over.

I despise fanaticism. Fundamentalism. Overbearing "my way or the highway" only their "truth" is right a-holes.
Oh so glad you guys can dismiss people so easily and assume everyone who doesn't agree with you, or doesn't fit your worldview, is wrong. You are what's wrong with the world, with your judgmental attitude telling people to go kill themselves. If you love animals so much more than humans, go live with the bears! That worked out so well for all those other people who tried... lol.
It's just so amazing that out of the over 7 billion people on this planet, you seem to have some amazing medical knowledge to know for a fact that not a single of those 7 billion people could possibly be allergic to plant life.

Quick google search shows enough people. Not hard to find -_- apparently just impossible to believe.

Boy allergic to almost all food
What it's like to be allergic to food
3 yr old allergic to all food
Utah teen unable to eat food
Woman with Mast Cell Disease allergic to life
Toddler allergic to all but 5 foods, can't cuddle parents due to allergies
Got my first allergy test and I'm allergic to EVERYTHING! Now what?!?
Woman allergic to everything prisoner in her own home

"We along with other neighbouring countries, have been sentenced."

I honestly don't know why I even bother trying to do ANYTHING, since something always happens to me that p!sses everybody else off. First, the assh!le that lives here calls up my landlord and b*****s again about how much of an unsanitary hog I am for 1) not keeping the place clean, 2) sitting in his room watching TV while doing my wash, 3) leaving railroad tracks on the toilet seat in the downstairs bathroom, 4) trying his damnedest to have me evicted for the slightest infraction of any rule, and 5) raises hell when I refuse to let him borrow any of my personal electronics or refuse to lend him any money. I got news for you, pally! First off, You're in bed when I do clean anything., like the living room, the kitchen, or the upstairs bathroom. Second, I really don't give 2 pints of piss that you work graveyard shift. You don't seem too concerned when you disturb my sleep to totally rip me a new assh!le because something doesn't meet your satisfaction, whether it be me taking you wherever you need to go, at a moment's notice, or me smelling like a goat because you used all the f!cking hot water when I go to take a shower. If you really want to know why I sit in your room watching TV smelling like a goat while doing the wash, you try smelling when the wash is dry in the dryer from the top floor of the house. I also have tinnitus, remember, so I can't hear the buzzer on the washer or dryer when their cycles are completed. But no, you raised enough hell with the landlord, that I'm now forbidden to enter your room to even collect the dirty dishes you have sitting there. I get tired of all your disrespect. And people wonder why I'm ready to take a meat cleaver to your head? And people wonder why I stay in my bedroom, with the door locked? I really no longer give a sh!t that you have ADHD, and you're abusing your meds. If anything, when you were dishonorably discharged from the Army for continually going AWOL, you should have been sent to Leavenworth for the rest of your miserable life, instead of here, where you're continually triggering my panic attacks, as well as triggering my colitis attacks.

Why should I loan you money when I'm broke? Hell, my damn checking account is about to bounce again, because I had to use my debit card, to put air in a flat tire, only to find out the radial belt broke loose from the tire. I was hoping that I wouldn't have to bounce anything this month, and have a sh!tload of NSF fees again this month. I ask for a dollar so the check to the psychologist doesn't bounce, but you still raise hell, even though you still owe me $150.00: $100.00 for the computer I sold you, and the $50.00 I loaned you for both gas and food when you initially moved in. And you wonder why I never have money? It all gets eaten up by NSF fees, because something else went wrong, and no one is willing to loan me the money so I can cover an outstanding check. I also don't like asking for money or for help, because I always end up catching hell when I do ask! Is it any wonder the bank is ready to boot me as a customer? It's the story of my financial life! Yet nobody, even my brothers are willing to help. They do nothing but raise hell when I need help. The only thing I ever hear is get a f!cking job, and what the f!ck happened to your back pay when you won your SSDI case, which you don't deserve to begin with, because accepting any kind of government money is evil to begin with. Well, the back pay went to pay rent, and whatever was left went to put a new front end on the Saturn, when it cane time for state inspection. Besides, SSA will boot you of SSDI if you attempt to even try to save any kind of money. So, F!CK OFF EVERYBODY!! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !!