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Sextaesada
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01 Jan 2012, 4:02 pm

I don't feel like I can be addicted to anything, every high I get on anything makes me feel terrible lately I guess that's good.
just makes me feel off, like I have to find a comfort zone and I'd rather be sober and not have to find that balance.


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Sweetleaf
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02 Jan 2012, 4:15 am

Sextaesada wrote:
Sweetleaf wrote:
So I feel the need to get really f*cked up and the alcohol and cannabis is just not doing it for me anymore, probably not a good thing......uhh I just don't know what to do anymore I'm suicidal and if I could find a dangerous substance to use that I would enjoy but that would probably kill me after a few months I think i would be more than willing at this point......I am just sick of everything and sick of not being able to feel anything other than misery.

I just felt the need to vent about my substance & suicide related issues, and will probably regret it as soon as I get done posting.


how about you take a break from smoking and drinking, instead. I'm going to quit smoking it just brings negative energy to my mind. a break will let your tolerances fade, and its nice to be sober sometimes.
I'm going to be sober for awhile, last night someone laced some weed with pain killers and it made me feel too good...


I am pretty much taking a break from drinking, in the past month I kinda got burnt out on alcohol and then during a recent acid trip I came to the conclusion drinking was not something worth doing every day or even every week. Its hard to explain but I was drinking while tripping and the way that effected me made me want to drink a lot less.........I actually had a strong pint sized bottle of beer last night and I did not even finish the entire thing just sipped on it all night.

As for smoking I would kind of like to at least stick to cutting down on ciggerettes, but I don't plan to quit cannabis.


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Sextaesada
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02 Jan 2012, 1:56 pm

Sweetleaf wrote:
Sextaesada wrote:
Sweetleaf wrote:
So I feel the need to get really f*cked up and the alcohol and cannabis is just not doing it for me anymore, probably not a good thing......uhh I just don't know what to do anymore I'm suicidal and if I could find a dangerous substance to use that I would enjoy but that would probably kill me after a few months I think i would be more than willing at this point......I am just sick of everything and sick of not being able to feel anything other than misery.

I just felt the need to vent about my substance & suicide related issues, and will probably regret it as soon as I get done posting.


how about you take a break from smoking and drinking, instead. I'm going to quit smoking it just brings negative energy to my mind. a break will let your tolerances fade, and its nice to be sober sometimes.
I'm going to be sober for awhile, last night someone laced some weed with pain killers and it made me feel too good...


I am pretty much taking a break from drinking, in the past month I kinda got burnt out on alcohol and then during a recent acid trip I came to the conclusion drinking was not something worth doing every day or even every week. Its hard to explain but I was drinking while tripping and the way that effected me made me want to drink a lot less.........I actually had a strong pint sized bottle of beer last night and I did not even finish the entire thing just sipped on it all night.

As for smoking I would kind of like to at least stick to cutting down on ciggerettes, but I don't plan to quit cannabis.

I wish I could keep smoking but it just doesn't make me happy anymore, the pleasure I should be getting from it has become pain. like I said in another post I have to find balance and I'd rather just be on stable ground.
beers flavor has always been too much for me, I have really sensitive taste buds, I prefer to just be numb than think about how sh***y my life is for 3-4 hours.


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TeaEarlGreyHot
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02 Jan 2012, 2:20 pm

I'm on day 2 of sobriety. I caved Saturday night and took a shot before going to bed. :oops:


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Sextaesada
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02 Jan 2012, 2:38 pm

I'm on day 3 you've been one upped tea. :lol:


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TeaEarlGreyHot
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02 Jan 2012, 2:43 pm

This would have been day 4 if I hadn't caved. Yesterday I was going to quit smoking but panicked once my cigarettes were gone and ran to the store to buy more.


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Sweetleaf
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02 Jan 2012, 7:07 pm

Sextaesada wrote:
Sweetleaf wrote:
Sextaesada wrote:
Sweetleaf wrote:
So I feel the need to get really f*cked up and the alcohol and cannabis is just not doing it for me anymore, probably not a good thing......uhh I just don't know what to do anymore I'm suicidal and if I could find a dangerous substance to use that I would enjoy but that would probably kill me after a few months I think i would be more than willing at this point......I am just sick of everything and sick of not being able to feel anything other than misery.

I just felt the need to vent about my substance & suicide related issues, and will probably regret it as soon as I get done posting.


how about you take a break from smoking and drinking, instead. I'm going to quit smoking it just brings negative energy to my mind. a break will let your tolerances fade, and its nice to be sober sometimes.
I'm going to be sober for awhile, last night someone laced some weed with pain killers and it made me feel too good...


I am pretty much taking a break from drinking, in the past month I kinda got burnt out on alcohol and then during a recent acid trip I came to the conclusion drinking was not something worth doing every day or even every week. Its hard to explain but I was drinking while tripping and the way that effected me made me want to drink a lot less.........I actually had a strong pint sized bottle of beer last night and I did not even finish the entire thing just sipped on it all night.

As for smoking I would kind of like to at least stick to cutting down on ciggerettes, but I don't plan to quit cannabis.

I wish I could keep smoking but it just doesn't make me happy anymore, the pleasure I should be getting from it has become pain. like I said in another post I have to find balance and I'd rather just be on stable ground.
beers flavor has always been too much for me, I have really sensitive taste buds, I prefer to just be numb than think about how sh***y my life is for 3-4 hours.


hmm well I kinda wish I could keep drinking, but for whatever reason it just does not do much for me anymore.....I still like how beer tastes and like the relaxed not caring feeling alcohol creates but I just don't enjoy it like I did before.


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Sextaesada
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02 Jan 2012, 7:49 pm

Sweetleaf wrote:
Sextaesada wrote:
Sweetleaf wrote:
Sextaesada wrote:
Sweetleaf wrote:
So I feel the need to get really f*cked up and the alcohol and cannabis is just not doing it for me anymore, probably not a good thing......uhh I just don't know what to do anymore I'm suicidal and if I could find a dangerous substance to use that I would enjoy but that would probably kill me after a few months I think i would be more than willing at this point......I am just sick of everything and sick of not being able to feel anything other than misery.

I just felt the need to vent about my substance & suicide related issues, and will probably regret it as soon as I get done posting.


how about you take a break from smoking and drinking, instead. I'm going to quit smoking it just brings negative energy to my mind. a break will let your tolerances fade, and its nice to be sober sometimes.
I'm going to be sober for awhile, last night someone laced some weed with pain killers and it made me feel too good...


I am pretty much taking a break from drinking, in the past month I kinda got burnt out on alcohol and then during a recent acid trip I came to the conclusion drinking was not something worth doing every day or even every week. Its hard to explain but I was drinking while tripping and the way that effected me made me want to drink a lot less.........I actually had a strong pint sized bottle of beer last night and I did not even finish the entire thing just sipped on it all night.

As for smoking I would kind of like to at least stick to cutting down on ciggerettes, but I don't plan to quit cannabis.

I wish I could keep smoking but it just doesn't make me happy anymore, the pleasure I should be getting from it has become pain. like I said in another post I have to find balance and I'd rather just be on stable ground.
beers flavor has always been too much for me, I have really sensitive taste buds, I prefer to just be numb than think about how sh***y my life is for 3-4 hours.


hmm well I kinda wish I could keep drinking, but for whatever reason it just does not do much for me anymore.....I still like how beer tastes and like the relaxed not caring feeling alcohol creates but I just don't enjoy it like I did before.

I don't have the option to drink much, I guess that's kinda nice. I am starting to like being sober, but anyways don't move onto harder stuff. I don't want you to get hurt or addicted to things you don't need. :cry: (sorry I don't know how to end a conversation very well, or when one stops or continues :? )


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Sweetleaf
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02 Jan 2012, 9:31 pm

Sextaesada wrote:
Sweetleaf wrote:
Sextaesada wrote:
Sweetleaf wrote:
Sextaesada wrote:
Sweetleaf wrote:
So I feel the need to get really f*cked up and the alcohol and cannabis is just not doing it for me anymore, probably not a good thing......uhh I just don't know what to do anymore I'm suicidal and if I could find a dangerous substance to use that I would enjoy but that would probably kill me after a few months I think i would be more than willing at this point......I am just sick of everything and sick of not being able to feel anything other than misery.

I just felt the need to vent about my substance & suicide related issues, and will probably regret it as soon as I get done posting.


how about you take a break from smoking and drinking, instead. I'm going to quit smoking it just brings negative energy to my mind. a break will let your tolerances fade, and its nice to be sober sometimes.
I'm going to be sober for awhile, last night someone laced some weed with pain killers and it made me feel too good...


I am pretty much taking a break from drinking, in the past month I kinda got burnt out on alcohol and then during a recent acid trip I came to the conclusion drinking was not something worth doing every day or even every week. Its hard to explain but I was drinking while tripping and the way that effected me made me want to drink a lot less.........I actually had a strong pint sized bottle of beer last night and I did not even finish the entire thing just sipped on it all night.

As for smoking I would kind of like to at least stick to cutting down on ciggerettes, but I don't plan to quit cannabis.

I wish I could keep smoking but it just doesn't make me happy anymore, the pleasure I should be getting from it has become pain. like I said in another post I have to find balance and I'd rather just be on stable ground.
beers flavor has always been too much for me, I have really sensitive taste buds, I prefer to just be numb than think about how sh***y my life is for 3-4 hours.


hmm well I kinda wish I could keep drinking, but for whatever reason it just does not do much for me anymore.....I still like how beer tastes and like the relaxed not caring feeling alcohol creates but I just don't enjoy it like I did before.

I don't have the option to drink much, I guess that's kinda nice. I am starting to like being sober, but anyways don't move onto harder stuff. I don't want you to get hurt or addicted to things you don't need. :cry: (sorry I don't know how to end a conversation very well, or when one stops or continues :? )


Well I feel this will help me cut down on alcohol, if I don't enjoy it as much whats the point in doing it as much. there are better things that are not nearly as harmful as alcohol.


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TeaEarlGreyHot
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08 Jan 2012, 10:37 pm

Does one or two drinks at a social function constitute falling off the wagon?


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Sweetleaf
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08 Jan 2012, 10:44 pm

Uhh I fail so much for taking a break from alcohol, I've drank four nights in a row this being the fourth :shrug:.....I am gradually cutting down on ciggerettes. At the moment I have a pack of disgusting Marlboro reds that was given to me and am out of my additive free pure tobacco ciggerettes. So I've only had two ciggerettes today because I hate marlboros. But yeah if I really want my nicotine I have to suffer the nastiness which reduces my desire to smoke.


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leejosepho
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10 Jan 2012, 12:17 pm

TeaEarlGreyHot wrote:
Does one or two drinks at a social function constitute falling off the wagon?

Technically, yes, if you had first made a vow, and I found this context online:

Quote:
The late 19th century saw the emergence of several temperance organisations ... followed on from the work of The Abstinence Society which had encouraged millions of men to 'take the pledge'. The Pledge wasn't just a vague intention to avoid drink; it was a specific and absolute promise never to drink again and was taken very seriously:

"I promise to abstain from all intoxicating drinks except used medicinally and by order of a medical man, and to discountenance the cause and practice of intemperance."

Water wagons [to damp down dusty streets during dry weather] were a commonplace sight in US cities at the time. They didn't carry drinking water ... [but people] who had vowed to give up drink ... said they would drink from the water-cart rather than take strong drink.

For the real alcoholic, however, A.A. does not suggest any such pledge or being "on the wagon". Rather, we share the fact of our experience that drinking again or "falling off the wagon" is inevitable unless we experience what one doctor had called "a complete psychic change" or "spiritual experience" producing a transformation of mind or "sanity" in relation to the alcohol that had been killing us one debacle at a time.


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pete1061
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12 Jan 2012, 9:21 pm

leejosepho wrote:
TeaEarlGreyHot wrote:
Does one or two drinks at a social function constitute falling off the wagon?

Technically, yes, if you had first made a vow, and I found this context online:

Quote:
The late 19th century saw the emergence of several temperance organisations ... followed on from the work of The Abstinence Society which had encouraged millions of men to 'take the pledge'. The Pledge wasn't just a vague intention to avoid drink; it was a specific and absolute promise never to drink again and was taken very seriously:

"I promise to abstain from all intoxicating drinks except used medicinally and by order of a medical man, and to discountenance the cause and practice of intemperance."

Water wagons [to damp down dusty streets during dry weather] were a commonplace sight in US cities at the time. They didn't carry drinking water ... [but people] who had vowed to give up drink ... said they would drink from the water-cart rather than take strong drink.

For the real alcoholic, however, A.A. does not suggest any such pledge or being "on the wagon". Rather, we share the fact of our experience that drinking again or "falling off the wagon" is inevitable unless we experience what one doctor had called "a complete psychic change" or "spiritual experience" producing a transformation of mind or "sanity" in relation to the alcohol that had been killing us one debacle at a time.


Officially, in AA literature, "slips" are to be entirely expected.
But unofficially within AA social circles, if one has a small slip on one or a few drinks, it's counted as a relapse and one is expected to start counting from zero days again.

But if someone is staying sober outside of AA, "falling off the wagon" is defined entirely on your own.
Bottom line is to be honest with yourself. If you honestly don't feel like you fell off the wagon, then you didn't.


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backagain
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16 Jan 2012, 7:49 pm

I certainly hope that those posting on this thread that are serious and honest, can tell which posters are writing a bunch of fantasy stories.



Sweetleaf
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16 Jan 2012, 7:54 pm

backagain wrote:
I certainly hope that those posting on this thread that are serious and honest, can tell which posters are writing a bunch of fantasy stories.


Why don't you stay out of threads you don't like eh? especially if your goal is to make accusations and assumptions.


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16 Jan 2012, 8:03 pm

backagain wrote:
I certainly hope that those posting on this thread that are serious and honest, can tell which posters are writing a bunch of fantasy stories.


Tell me, have you ever experienced a drug addiction? It can read much like a fantasy story, but it is very real and it is hell.