Rants

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Fine, whatever...

Euthanasia really ought to be legal. It would solve all my problems in one go.

I will be happy when I finish this present lifetime and can rest.

Hey Autism $peaks: do you need a bitcoin address or are you just slow?

_________________
"Standing on a well-chilled cinder, we see the fading of the suns, and try to recall the vanished brilliance of the origin of the worlds."
-Georges Lemaitre
"I fly through hyperspace, in my green computer interface"
-Gem Tos

Identifying trees? Are you f*****g kidding me?

You want a tree? Here's tree no. 1: the Larch.


There. Now you all know I'm a human so don't make me identify anymore bloody trees.

I would like to wake up one of these days sans sciatica.

Everything is my fault; I'm the reason my family is dysfunctional.

SERIOUSLY, WHY WON'T ANYONE HELP ME FIND ANY F***ING CYANIDE!? I DESERVE IT AFTER PUTTING MY FAMILY THROUGH HELL!!

The only good conservative is a conservative who's had his or her brains blasted out with a 12-gauge.

I HATE CRUZ!! !

I feel really upset and stressed today because all my plans have gone wrong, Later today (it's gone midnight so it would be today) I was due to be flying to Guernsey (island of the north west France) I had the hotel booked. I was going to fly in a special plane called a Trislander, well its a bit complicated because the plan was to fly over from the UK mainland as I have a friend who works for this airline and I can fly cheaper because he has put me on his staff travel list, but thats not the flight in the Trislander, thats a Q400 anyway so once I got to Guernsey the plan was to fly to Alderney on the Trislander.

But they are unable to guarantee that the flight would be a Trislander, they are in the process of retiring their fleet of Trislanders and they have newer planes to replace them, the Trislanders will be retired some time this year but there is no date set.

and now the weather is predicted to be really bad that day, very strong winds (50kts) and heavy rain, the Trislander is only a small plane, it carried about 18 passengers, it's an "island hopper" and I have a feeling that they will cancel the flights, even if they could guarantee it was a Trislander operating the flight, but its the uncertainty of it all, they said even though they did have a Trislander flight scheduled that day, there is every possibility it could be replaced by the newer plane which I have no interest in.

And to top it off this staff travel thing has fallen through, I don't know how it works exactly but he had to wait for a reply from the department that does staff travel in order for them to confirm I was booked into the system, and they have not replied so i could have turned up at the airport today and found I couldn't even fly anyway.

I have had to cancel the hotel now, I was worried they might charge me for cancelling as they had my bank card details but they said it would be OK.

I'm still on the staff discount thing and once I am booked on I can pick any date to fly on but after todays events I am a little reluctant because i worry that something else will go wrong and I do not cope well when plans and schedules get messed up and there is no back up plan, I literally have to take a gamble which I hate. There are no Trislander flights listed for the whole of next week either I'm wondering of i should just give up on the idea of flying on one, as much as that makes me very sad, i might be easier to accept that then to have to be disappointed again if something goes wrong.

Being home is getting REALLY old real fast.

I miss being independent and having my own apartment. My dad had his second retina detach last month, so now he's stuck at home and I've got to babysit him for over a month. All I can do is sit in my room and be on my computer. This is making my mom get all anxious because I'm not seeing her much now since I have to be here. And of course she projects it onto me. -_- This is going to be a long f*****g month. I'm definitely going to take classes during the second half of summer just so I can live independently again. I'm so ready to just hop in my car and screw it all and drive hundreds of miles away from this sinking tar pit trap I've reentered.

I can't stand the dentist. It's like torture for me, especially with my breathing difficulties and sensory overload.

rain rain rain gets old fairly quicklike

... Me and my screwed definition of "needy".

To me, being needy isn't about lacking of privileges, an ability, a chance or a choice or someone who lacks certain fulfillments, but being a demanding nuisance who is an inconvinience to others and to self.

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Lose more time here - Updates at least once a week.

God nearly every interaction with him makes my blood boil. I need a break.