Verbal Communications Differences and Difficulties Sticky

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I have such a hard time matching concepts with the words that define them. I can recognize things in an almost amorphous way but can' t put a concrete frame around it. It' s easier when I post vs speech, but I' m forever running after a framework to contain things.
Professor X . There' s no bother or burden-- just sharing so don' t feel that you are

Talking is really hard for me, but only with people I don't know. When I have to convey my thoughts out loud, I keep my train of thought as concise and simple as possible...I hate small talk, it leads to disaster every time, mostly because I cycle through all the 'appropriate' responses about two times before I pick the right response...and by then its too late. By then the person has decided that I am extremely stupid. Worst of all, when I get really stressed/angry my words will actually slur together and my line of thought will get fragmented to the point where I hardly make any sense at all

I have been accused of being high on the job because of this

I've had some rough patches in the past where people have completely misunderstood my intentions, and there was nothing I could say to change their perceptions. I say what I mean and do what I say. That's me in a nutshell, and I don't have ulterior motives for being nice. That's how human beings are supposed to act, at least on my planet

i intended to try to write a post on how my nonverbal issues seem different than some around here .. well .. then the nonverbal issues hit .. lolol .. im hitten ..

i needed to be completely nonverbal (i mean internally too) .. yet again .. happens pretty much all the time these days .. (this time i played computer games)

it is more and more like .. suddenly im unusually lost .. then i realise .. im too verbal .. i need to go down on the real level .. the nonverbal level .. i picture a horse .. then i stay with that horse .. maybe even hugging it ..

other nonverbal news .. i have tried for eons to change apartment .. the old one is too expensive .. it is in fact my mom's old apartment.

now it seems i've finally sorted through and cleaned up this old place pretty nearly enough to be able to show it to people. The nonverbal part is that i do it completely nonverbally. otherwise .. no action . nothing .. IOW .. i plan and act completely with no internal dialogue. Otherwise it's like the entire person (me) freezes .. just stops working ..

i'm still very focused on my nonverbal issues. It seems ever more .. whatever i do or plan .. i need to stay pretty nonverbal.

Now it was time to talk to my old aunt. I realised i dreaded it quite a lot .. i felt i needed to avoid words to such a degree these days .. like as soon as i get too wordy im in agony and need to find a way to remain nonverbal for quite a while to be OK again. And how do you do that if you feel you ought to talk to aunt on the phone .. ?

well, it seems it was pretty OK. It seems the big issue is myself. Like to her it seems like not a big deal at all that i'm much less talkative .. really just answering really briefly to all she says and not saying really anything myself. Relief!

I guess i felt i will never be able to talk to my family again now that i seem to become as nonverbal as i am ... now it seems that mostly makes me non-chatty .. but not actually completely silent like i feared. I kept picturing my inner horse while we talked. it kept me reasonably OK emotionally. and it seemed she liked talking too.

Just like a calm forum is hard to digest a times.

Travel is a mock up of internal margins and map coding. Like certain lines come to different conclusions in travel terms a wad of cash always trades in for a poor third class seat and black coffee in the middle of waking hours and when you're half pressed and wondering where the next happy go lucky person is gonna bounce in and either make your day and swan off or comes in takes your paper and shrugs off a simplex hand gesture then im not really sure where this is all going.. but my non-verbal task is to really just sit back and wait to see what happens and if its too much too digest and contemplate then walk away and find a niche where I can be left alone either to think or do the job of both.
These days so much emphasis is on people and what they think rather than themselves and what makes them tick because without these tools for inner solace and wisdom you don't even gain your own advice, maybe mine is through my calm emotionally attached demeanour and in the past it was neither. so maybe I am learning a new curb or stepping stone if you like but its not been without some flaw and thought from some others who teach me through their words and their attitudes, that without life or love, you may as well be another washed up POW on the shorelines of Alcatraz or the Somme and the love you feel will guide you through a never ending maze of delight and shunned pretence of what is morally right until the way forwards becomes the new you and the rest of what ever was once preached over rationed proceedings will hold the next calling card of the west and the might reign of the south.
Proceed all mighty GOD proceed until the chapter in your next life runs out and before we all bid you a restless night and ourselves turn in may I ruffle through your next pit of doom to channel all my old useless energies into and cry truth in my sleep for a new day beckons whilst the old lay beneath a pile of old rubble damaged and torn looking for an escape.
Torture be not in the mind of the beholder but in the fear of the next eye-witness, take me and hold me at your will until I have the strength to forfeit the capture and break free from a reign of guilt and sadness.
Amen---

i have many words, but when writing, not speaking, i can edit and say better what i want or mean. wordiness is sometihing i have tried to get away from, and i find when i talk exessively i am nto happy. please pardon the spelling mistakes. not looking a thte page helps too for me to be fluid
i don't like to look at a face when i am communicating, and not at the page.
feeling alone, i extend my communication(s)/words to others via the written page
if tehy are read and responded to, i feel contacted, reached out to.
here, on the page, i can be patient, and no one stops me from being so..
many times people have been impatient with me. they have refused to speak to me. because it is my choice to make my responses delayed.
i find speech almost a false reresentation of what i want communicated,
i just dont' know what to say, and when i speak, it seems my words do nto do wht i intend them to!! what should i do? it is hard for me to use words to commnicate what i mean. i am flustered by the amount of words that come into my mind, all at once. i am a wordy person, i could say, but have limited my use of them to b a better communicator

I lose how to form words (motor planning) from emotional and sensory overload. Communicating through sounds and stimming is my way.

I'm better than typing and writing than verbal communication. I also tend to be wordy by using big words to enhance my otherwise overt simplicity. According to my parents I was able to speak complete sentences by age 2. Now I have a hesitant stutter when I talk to anybody including my parents, probably from being quiet too much.

Hi guys. I try to conversate with people on a daily basis. The reason why I don't enjoy it that much is because the conversation that I have to give most people is SOOO boring to me. I'm not interested in day to day, superficial or boring things. I want to talk about the complexities of life and always find myself on a different page than others. I didn't know that I was different from others. I didnt know that people would get annoyed by me. I also couldn't understand the social cues and body language others were giving me. I finally starting realizing the truth and it hurt sooooo bad. My lover at the time pointed out everything that I said or did "socially awkward" one night and I reevaluated every social interaction I've ever had. At the time, I had no idea that I was on the Autistic spectrum. Then I stopped talking. I stopped talking to my best friends. I stopped making new friends. I stopped small talking with coworkers. I've tried my hardest to observe others from a different lens and try to figure out what is appropriate to say in certain situations. I have learned when someone starts thinking that I'm weird. It happens often, so I talk less and less. I don't know if I'm alone on this or if there is any one else in my situation or if this has anything to do with aspergers.

Also, I slur so many of my words that I sound uneducated. Little do most know that I actually have a lot of depth but it takes me so much dedication to express it to another human being. I am currently talking to one person right now (and my parents) and I even catch myself saying things to that person that makes her think I'm an oddball. I'm wanting people to accept me for who I am, but I feel like there are so few people that want to.
Sorry about the rant. A lot comes out when I type

Hello, i'm new here. but this is the perfect thread for me because im getting more and more worried about my verbal skills. im not sure if theyre getting worse, or if im just now noticing them, but either way i dont like it

when it comes to public speaking and being in front of a large group of people, i'm great. there's a general agreement that i'm the best public speaker in my grade, if not in the whole school. i go to a project based learning school (its a new education system that my school is testing) so i get a lot of practice with that. ive gotten so good, that i managed to recite a poem off the top of my head in front of a full theater, with only 5 minutes notice (there was a serious miscommunication)

However, when I'm 1 on 1 or with a group of my close friends, my speech degrades to that of someone who had never attended a day of school in their lives.

i slur my speech, stutter, forget words, describe things terribly like "the thing with the stuff" and completely expect the other person to understand what I mean, and trail off in a combination of sounds that sounds like im having a stroke (as described by a friend)

i also pick up speech patterns really easily, so if i talk to someone with an accent, i have to deal with that too. i started watching doctor who awhile back, and I had a vaguely British accent for a week

it's really comforting to go down this thread and see that it's because of my aspergers, because i didnt realize this was a problem for aspies and was starting to worry that it might have been something worse

in my personal life things run smoother these days .. sleeping and eating better ..

then again .. trying to return now here to WP .. I seem to have to realise and accept .. (pheww .. already verbally congested) .. i am almost completely nonverbal in the read and write dpt it seems .. a few lines of reading .. if that .. and writing is really cramped ..

tho .. my basic life is improved .. maybe i can even change apartment some day soon (-8

First, I am not good at understanding what people are saying, though I think I get it, I often do not. Then, when there is a specific message that needs to get to someone either in real life or telephone (yuck) I have a clear image of what it is, but don't verbalize it well. It comes out vague and sometimes with words that I didn't mean to use, because thinking of the right words to say takes me way longer than most conversations have. Add this to the fact that I often misunderstand people and am responding to the wrong meaning, and communication becomes so stressful that it's not worth it. Talking, basically is not for me.
If I am tired or stressed at all it is worse: randomly the words I say will be the opposite of what I wanted.

hello, like this topic. lately, under a lot of physically demanding work requirements, i have felt my communication ability going down. i cannot seem to get a point across to my boss. it is frustrating. i speak, in what is perfectly clear language (to me).-- and i am answered with a reply which leaves me thinking i must be dumb.

anyone else get answers which don't make sense?

actually, it sounds as though my boss was patronizing. OR maybe i am just being emphatic and he glib or non-chalant. nice recovery for me. but still leaves me out of it, not part of their world and i guess i don't care or give up 'cause - -- my time is not going to be wasted on someone who is not listening, or who can't understand me (love it) and more but i have to go now i ws fun putting pthe emoticons heehee

Hello,

Is this "neurotypical", or is it just my parents and people at home. When I speak out a complaint, or problem, what they do is try to comfort me. Yes, comfort me, only. I thought they're trying to fix my problem but it took me a lot of realizations that they're just telling me things that I want to hear so that I could stop complaining and spreading my frown to them. I don't like it. For me it's wrong to approach people and deal with them to simply make you feel good, even to the point you're lying or fooling them. I always deal with people by helping them face the problem and help them to solve it, not put a sweet icing to cover their problems.

I think I'm getting worse and worse at verbal communication. I used to be relatively quiet, but now I'm hemming and hawing and using malapropisms when I open my yap. I tend to spend a lot of time online late at night because it's one of the few things that makes me feel happy; do you guys think that my lack of sleep is the main problem, or just the only problem?