cheerlessleader, with demands like that it's no wonder you can't find anyone! Can't leave you OR beat you up! Granted, #5 is maybe a little stickler for me depending on how restrictive it is
Any rate, my rant for the day... Was talking to cousin of my ex-wife online last night... She's always been friendly enough, even after the wife left. We're chatting about how her husband had the car wreaked, and I offer my car for as long as they need it... Within minutes of that sincere gesture, we get to how everything in the marriage going sour is all my fault, which... Well, I expect that, she's family and all. Kinda starts to get under my skin when it hits the "genetic defect" talk... Really starts getting to me with the talk of "useless" genetic defects. But when she mentioned that it's not a good idea for two people with the same genetic defect to have kids is a bad idea.... GRRRRrrr!
Admittedly, this is a valid concern, IF both people have AS or ASD! But she wants to use OCD as a specific example of a useless trait being paired up. Obviously it's not useless, but it's also a trait I don't even have strongly. Closest I come is that I've noticed I --tend-- to step over cracks. But my wife was sooooo not OCD. And although she definitly has a few syndroms of her own!, she's nowhere near AS or OCD.
And for this woman to backhandly insult my children! I have 3 kids (who call her "Aunt --").
My girl is so social and well adjusted... I'd wonder who my wife was cheating with, but even without AS genes, she's a marvel of NT'ness. When she stays with me, every kid within four square blocks comes to visit.
My elder son, well, he definitly shows AS traits. But despite problably being less AS'ish than his old man, I absolutly refuse to play computer games with him. I like to win too much .
My younger son... Well he's the hardest for me to sum up, so a little story is in order... When he was four (he's 5 now), he asked a waitress in a fancy restaurant to marry him. He had made such an impression on her, she not only said yes, but started crying. And I mean tears. Granted, he almost certainly has ADHD. I suspect I may have ADD, so that might not be surprising. Except he's not biologically mine!
So even judging from her narrow-minded, severally flawed point of view, with a set "useless flawed DNA", there's not sign OCD in either of my kids. Instead, I have a well adjusted NT who is a shoe-in for gifted (teacher problems have held up testing) and a 9 yo with an IQ of 141 who can beat his father in the game of his choice (and I'm proud to this day of "flipping" the original Space Invaders three times in one game) .
Makes me glad I'm AS, and can forgive her for being an idiot. Well, I didn't say I -have- forgiven her