Seriously, why is there so much Misogyny on WrongPlanet?!

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I have no idea about any of this stuff that's going on in this thread ^^^ but I'd like to say something about white knighting. Not because anyone here has called me that, but I have been called it elsewhere.

I'd like to propose something for those who think that when a man stands up for women the only possible reason for doing so is for an ego boost when the women thank them.

L&D contains a lot of threads written by men, often young men, who are in psychological pain. That's what causes misogyny, in my opinion. It's men in pain, dealing with it badly. I believe that most, if not all, mental anguish occurs when the way we see the world around us (whether we've been taught it, or learned it through experience), fails to meet the reality in front of us. I think the discrepancy, and refusing to change the way we see the world when new information is given to us, is what causes the pain.

I genuinely feel for these men. Believe that or not. And I want to help them. Because I think that'd be good for them, and good for the women that their misguided sense of victimhood can harm too. I'll cop to some egotism there, in thinking that I might be able to help.

All I have ever tried to do in those threads is encourage these men to think differently about women and relationships. And there's an incredible amount of resistance to that encouragement.

That's why I think it's unhelpful to tell them that that it's their testosterone, or 'just the way it is' or that they're just not part of the 20% of men that women go for. Because it gives them nothing constructive to do. It encourages a sense of helplessness and victimhood.

And it isn't true because there's a lot they can do. And that's empowering and positive. And thinking about women differently is a big part of what they can do. But generally, they don't want to hear it because it's hard to change the way we think, and there's comfort, of a sort, in being a victim and sharing your victimhood with other victims.

But sometimes, I still want to try to help. And I think its possible to want to help these guys and also want make life a little easier for the women they interact with.

And if people want to call that White Knighting or whatever, if they can't conceive of any motivation beyond impressing women, well, to me, that says more about them than it does about the men they're talking about.

Women and men can both be victims of domestic violence.
Women are more likely to die or be seriously injured.Men are more likely not to report their partner abusing them.
Women and men can both be victims of rape or other sexual assault.
Again this happens more often to women.Again most men are shamed and won’t report this and the same for many women.
How many men on this forum had their partner grab them by the hair and beat their head into the floor?
How many have been sexually assaulted?
It’s possible there are a few.But there are more whining they can’t get a date.

^ Often, those who are whining for a date show no interest or concern for members who are struggling with other issues. If people want a partner, they need to be able to listen to, understand, and sympathize with others. This is one of the reasons why talking about trauma and abuse shouldn't be relegated to the women's section. Also, yes, men experience abuse too.