Verbal Communications Differences and Difficulties Sticky

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I've always felt that the description of it fits me, although obviously, not everyone is the same. It's pretty rare that I have anything important to say when I'm stressed enough to go completely mute, so it's usually not an issue for me. I've thought about learning sign language, but I don't know how useful it would be.

The thing I hate the most is when I'm talking to someone I'm comfortable with, and then someone new overhears us and interjects, and I reply to them with a silent "deer in headlights" look =/ I'm sure they all think I'm just being rude, especially at work.

Thankfully it's not called "elective mutism" anymore, which sounds even more like those afflicted are choosing to be silent

I. GIVE. UP.
These days, I wonder if I actually have some kind of aphasia. That is how badly misunderstood my verbal communication is. I am saying something that I think makes perfect sense, there is no possible way it could be misunderstood at all, and someone interprets the exact opposite.
Maybe I should get this tested. Maybe I'm actually speaking words that correspond to the exact opposite of what I mean? It seems the only likely explanation.
In the meantime, I'm employing ACC apps and sign language. I mean it.

It's a tricky one. The "elective" bit could mean anything - I am often an "elective" mute. This means that I can physically make my vocal chords make sound (albeit impaired, due to speech disorder) and I can form and use language. But the process of doing so is so unpleasant, and bloody difficult, and requires all my effort and at times is physically painful because of my speech issues, and as stated above something goes wrong in translation and I am constantly misunderstood, I choose not to use speech.
So some of it may be "elective" in that yes, I can speak to some degree. But all the other stuff that makes speaking impractical and horrible for me is not my choice at all.

Thanks for this. I got to watch a bit and enjoyed it. I felt I could relate to him, his life, and his communication style.

For me, talking is usually doable, just not very natural. When I'm burned out or haven't been around people for days (which is very relaxing), then it becomes tough. Being misunderstood is so common, though, even though I'm saying what I mean. I always feel like people are responding to some deep, hidden meaning I'm unaware of.

Hmm, I recently got told all the verbal communication problems between me and another person were all my fault for my inability to speak much, when this person is profoundly deaf and can only hear minimally with hearing aids and an amplifier. But no, it's still my fault because I am "soft spoken" because of my own disabilities around speaking. Thanks a lot for the solidarity, brother.

This thread has been a bit eye opening for me.
Kind of intense.

I was shocked by the sound of my voice today. It's been a while since that's happened. It was weird. I have been speaking on a daily basis lately, if only a little bit. But today for whatever reason I felt taken aback by the sound of it. I know the other day I ran into someone who brings out my talkative side and I talked at her for a fair amount of time in a clear voice, which was probably the first time I've said that much at once in months, but it didn't have the same effect as today. Today I said far less than then but it felt a lot weirder. Almost like an out of body experience or something. It's been on my mind all day.

Ah, I don't know why I keep trying.

It's hard, it's f*****g hard.
No one knows how hard.

Hi:

I've said it before, and I'll say it again... "I identify as nonverbal and use my iPad to communicate in the majority of situations... it's physically painful for me to be verbal. and not a lot of people really seem to get it and I wish I could have a doctor just sever my vocal cords or something."

I think that communication is a core human right that if a person identifies as nonverbal or is more comfortable in such state, that preference should be respected but hey what do I know? I even have multiple autism service organizations behind me on this one. I don't even know why people must force me to be verbal when I make it clear "ouch! this is painful and very hard! this s**t is hard!"

I am very quiet. I don't feel comfortable with talking in most situations. At school I usually don't talk. I don't feel comfortable doing class discussions. Sometimes teachers randomly choose me to answer a question and I blush, and respond but I usually mix up my words. I hate it. I lose sleep because of anxiety over this stuff. I talk with my friends and my girlfriend as well as parents a lot more than I do with other people. Sometimes I really want to join discussions but I get really anxious and I cannot. I like to listen to people though. I observe a lot too. I notice things that others do not, because of observing. Sometimes I have emotional problems because of the frustration of not being able to find the words for how I feel. I get really overwhelmed sometimes and I just forget what I was going to say. Sometimes when people ask me a question and I respond too quietly or my words are jumbled because I am nervous, they will ask me to repeat it multiple times. That is very stressful to me and causes me to jumble my words up even more. I like typing because I don't have to worry about my tone or mixing up words. I do like to talk to myself though, because it is soothing.

I swear to god there is something wrong with my communication. Either the world is changing or my mom is just crazy and I keep running into crazy people. Ask a question, it gets taken the wrong way and you are given a rude response or they get defensive. You also get accused of being snarky when you are annoyed or irritable and when people are being unreasonable.

I swore it used to not be like this so society must be changing showing more and more of my social impairment. I find this very frightening because this will make my anxiety even worse making me more quiet and less social.

I've decided I'm going to stop caring what my parents think, and I'm just going to go ahead and use the text-to-speech app I have on my phone when it will be easier to do that (mostly when talking to people I don't know, like ordering food at a restaurant or if someone asks me questions about my service dog). It will take so much stress off of me, and it will be much easier for the other person to understand. Here's hoping I don't get yelled at the first time I try it, or at least that my parents wait until we're home to do so. And hey, I'll be able to explain and defend myself better using text-to-speech, too! I really feel like getting used to using it will be a major step toward independence for me.

Which text to speech app do you use? I’m running Snap+ Core First by on my iPad. I am always looking to find new apps and tools so if one suddenly disappears I’m not legt stranded.

I just downloaded the first one that came up when I searched for "text to speech" in the app store on my phone.

Well, I told my parents I was going to do this, and they both just said "okay." I'm very pleased, that's a much better response than the last time I suggested possibly using text-to-speech.

I need to say that I'm glad your parents are willing to let you migrate to TTS

I am going crazy because my aspie lover is so abusive and reactive while texting and yet shows a significant depth of caring in other ways . When we meet in the flesh he is the perfect gentleman. It's like a split personality.The abuse is doing my head in, it's like he doesn't correlate my response to his choice of words.