Not sure how to trust my doc or any other medical person.

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I'm not happy because people see what I eat and my lifestyle and they judge me based on that, like everyone here. No one accepts me like my doc does not accept there are things I will not do. Due to people close to me abusing drugs, I will not take drugs, anti depressents and the like. I will not take happy pills hiding my real feelings.

I have tryed exercising, it does not make me happy. I HATE it. It never made me happy. It made me feel more depressed and in pain even after I have done it for awhile. I will not do it anymore. No one can force me to do it. Accept me for who I am and do not judge me until you have walked in my shoes.

I am taking my shots. That is how I am controling my dibetes, not with diet or excercise. I will be happy when my doc and everyone accepts that and tells me I'm doing good just doing that and not force me to do the things I don't want to do. I tell people I will never do those things but the keep telling me I should. Its like they don't hear what I am telling them and won't shut up about it. Nag nag nag....

Eating the foods I enjoy is one of the few joys I feel I have in my life, and everyone wants to take it away from me.

KenM,

The pain you experience from exercising is there only because your body is not used to exercising. Had you kept at it longer, you would've realized that the pain goes away. It's like adding oil to a very rusted, disused machine; it takes time to get the machine back up and running, and it'll be rough for the first few turns of the handle, but eventually the oil works its way in and it'll be smoothly running again. People who exercise a lot don't experience the pain you described, because their bodies are still smoothly running. They aren't in chronic pain, and you won't be either.

You simply just gave up too soon at the first sign of difficulty. Changing diet and exercise habits aren't easy, and getting back in shape is definitely not easy, but after a while your body gets used to it, your mind gets used to it, and you'd be happier over all with the results.

Now if you don't mind me, apparently I'm going to burn in hell now.

Thats the other thing. People tell me I need to get into shape. I tell them round is a shape.

I can't believe some of the attitudes I'm seeing on this thread. If you don't want to help, why respond at all? I'm only up to the end of page two, but I'll be back.

I can relate to being angry with doctors who treat you like a child. When you retell the story, the attitude doesn't come through. But you know when people are putting you down. That crap shouldn't still be happening when you're 40 years old. When they pretend they don't know that they are being disrespectful, it's called "disingenuous." They know what they're doing and they're full of crap.

I can also relate to not trusting doctors. Some of them are incompetent, stupid, and sometimes they outright lie. They are not gods, even though they think they are.
My father had a triple bypass, and he said that it wasn't worth it. Nobody told him what he was really getting into. Concerning a quality of life issue, the doctors are no more qualified to make a value judgment than you are. Their job is to give you the facts and let you decide, not to lie and trick you into doing what they think is right.

You definitely need a different doctor. And to tell the new doctor why. Write a note so you get it right, rather than giving random bits that he won't understand. No cussing, no ranting, just spell it out and explain that you want respect, like any other adult. The doctor works for you.

Could you make your own TV dinners that are cheaper and more in line with what you're supposed to have? Or portions, so that putting it together is quick and easy? Like, make a big batch of meat and sauce, then freeze it in single servings, so all you need to do is add some noodles or something.

Does anyone know how "Meals on wheels" works? I would imagine that it's affordable and that they know how to put together a meal for a diabetic. Are there any similar services available?

I know what you mean about the "no pain, no gain" morons. Pain is bad. Pain is nature's way of telling you to stop being an idiot. Still, you should find something that's not painful. And/or start more slowly so you build up a tolerance.
If you're on your feet all day, what's the big deal with exercise? Is there something specific they want you to do? Or just aerobic?
Maybe you could join one of those dance/exercise groups. They're mostly women, so that could make it more interesting.
If you have a medical need, can you get cheap or free membership at some fitness club? Preferably something with a pool? That's the best kind of exercise. It's boring without some kind of partner, but maybe you could find one there.

How much have you looked into alternative medicine? Have you signed up for an on-line diabetic community?

Well I had to go to my docs office to get bloodwork done today. They always want more bloodwork from me. The sample I gave them to work from when I joined the practice 5 years ago is not good enough I guess.

The lady doing the blood work hit a nerve and REALLY HURT ME. I was in physical pain. I told her that it hurt but she did not pull it out an go in a different place. I had to be in pain for the whole thing. I have had bloodwork before and it should never hurt that much. She knew I was in pain but she did not do anything to change that fact. Proof they don't care about how I feel or that they hurt me.

To those who harass, practice saying, "It's a quality of life issue." In my case, it was smoking. I was self-medicating. I always said that tobacco smoking is healthier than any of than the alternatives, and that I would quit when someone came up with something that is more effective, healthier, safer, and cheaper. It did eventually happen, but no doctor will tell you about it. http://www.e-cigarette-forum.com

What alternatives have you looked into on your own? Have you tried anything else? Do you have a friend or relative or anyone who is a nurse or somehow connected to the medical field? Do other blood relatives have problems similar to yours, and can you compare notes? Who can help you make sense of it all? (Other than those with a vested interest in keeping you sick.)

I just did a quick google. This one looked interesting. http://diabetes.niddk.nih.gov/dm/pubs/a ... etherapies (I can't do your research for you. I don't know whether you're type I or II, or even what that means. I don't know your other medical issues, tastes & preferences, religious/philosophical issues...)

Telling the regular doctor that you are thinking about an alternative is advisable. You do not need his permission to make a change.

Still, it could be helpful to give him a chance to explain why an alternative is bad. He might actually give you some information for a change. There's a lot of snake oil out there. Including what the regular doctors are selling. I think I'd rather hear a slimy sales pitch than listen to some jackazz with delusions of godhood barking orders.

At worst, it might be amusing to watch him squirm and try to string the stupid lies together.

Well I was suposted to have my physical with my nurse practioneer today. But when they wanted to shave my chest to hook the EKG stuff to me is when I freaked out. I told them to stop and I wanted to leave. I told the nurse why. She got the NP and I told her everything. How I feel they put me on display, how i feel they use me for experements, how I feel they keep preaching to me and telling me how to live my life, how I feel that they are responsible for ruining my life and giving me diebetes. I told her I have no idea how i can trust anyone in the medical field because of these experences. She said she was sorry I felt that way and its not there intention for making me feel like that when I go to see them and she hopes I get the "proper care" I need if not with them but someone. But I have no intrest in going to a medical person. Period. I know I will freak out and feel the same way with any medical person.

I also know that thinking and feeling like this is really not good for me, but I have no idea how to change it. See a medical person for my fear of seeing medical people? Does not sound right to me.

I have thought about what I want from my doctor. Basically I want to be treated like a car. When something goes wrong with my car, I bring it to my mechanic and he fixes it. When there is something wrong with me, I want to go to my doc and he fixes it. No coming in for blood work every 3 months, no being told how to live my life and all that. Then after he fixes me I go on my way until I need to be cured again.

KenM,

It's much more difficult to fix the human body, than it is to fix a car. When a car breaks down, the broken, worn down parts are simply taken out and replaced. Doctors simply can't do that for people, except in the case of transplants. Even then, you would be waiting for years to get any pancreatic transplant, and in the meantime your condition will get worse. Imagine trying to drive a car with a broken radiator for years on end, waiting for a new radiator to become available. That car's seriously going to overheat and explode well before anything good happens to that car.

You're supposed to check your car's oil every so often to see whether it's dirty or low. Having you go in for blood work every so often is done for similar reasons.

Also... sometimes the car has undergone so much damage that it simply isn't worth it to fix the car. The car then goes to the junkyard with its parts sold for scrap.

By the way, hair grows back. Do you run around topless in public a lot? I doubt people would ever notice that your chest got shaved.

You want to be fixed like a car, but you have to realize that the owner of the car is also responsible for proper maintenance of the car. It's your responsibility to ensure that all the fluids are topped off, tires are properly inflated, brakes are ok, etc.. Sure, you can do absolutely no maintenance of your car on your own and have the auto mechanic take care of it, but the repairs are vastly more expensive and difficult than to do the preventative maintenance up front. At least a car is a human creation, so mechanics know the details of how cars work. We don't know every detail about how the human body works, that's one reason why fixing problems with the body is more difficult than fixing a car, and this fact makes preventative maintenance of the human machine even more significant.

If you want to change your gut feelings about the medical community, it is very helpful to go in there with a mindset that they are actually trying to help you the best way that they know how, rather than immediately putting them on the defensive. Do you know the details about what they are looking for in the blood when they do the bloodwork? Do you know why they do the EKG, how it works, how to interpret the data they gather from it? Understanding more about what they do, and asking a lot of nonaccusatory questions would help reduce the tension and animosity every time you go in for a checkup. Plus it would help reduce any feeling that you are powerless. You aren't powerless. There's a lot you can still do.

I do feel powerless. I feel every medical person has a God complex and trys to cram there belives down my throat. If you don't do it the way want, you are wrong. Thats the impression I get from them.

Part of it comes from the time I felt my old NP was not treating me good. So I told my concilier about it. He asked if he could talk to her to tell her my issues. I let him do that. I though things would be better, but the next time I saw the NP she said: "Ken, I know you have issues but too bad, this is the way its going to be." I complained to the doc office manager and wanted her to be fired for patient abuse, they did nothing.

I feel what they are looking for in my bloodwork is whatever drugs they can put me on next due to my numbers. They don't even ask me how I feel about it. The NP just says "your bloodwork shows this number is X, so I'm putting you on drug Y. Have fun becoming an addict."

No matter how hard I try, I can't get past the mindset that medical people don't care about how I feel. They just want me on more drugs. You say docs can't just fix me, but when they have God complexs like the ones I have dealt with, they feel they can. They say they want to help me but they don't treat me like a person.