I lost my dog today.

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Thank you. I hope I do make it through. I keep hearing what sounds like her dog tags rattling, or noises how her kennel door sounded when she would punch it in the mornings to tell me to take her out. Then I realize it's a zipper tab on a pocket or a mesh wire caught in the wind, etc. I am doing better during the day, for the most part, but mornings and evenings I am still finding myself crying like a baby.

Losing pets sucks. Deeply.

*hugs*

She was a lovely girl. You gave her a lovely life. It doesn't comfort your loss much, I don't guess...

...but if you believe in the Rainbow Bridge and all that happy crappy (I do)...

...then she was greeted by a dog-loving old hillbilly Aspie who will be more than happy to cook for her and give her lovin' until you get there to be with her again.

My condolences.

Thank you both. I hold out hope that we will be reunited. I see in several texts that both human and other animals have the same "breath of life"/spirit/soul. I also read where the non-human animals, while suffering the curse of death that mankind has brought to this world, do not suffer the risk of damnation that many believe will befall those who are "inherently evil" and refuse to "repent" or "change their ways".

So I continue to hope. I continue to pray. And I continue to try to find in my mind a way to bring the full nature of Bonnie's love and goodness out through telling her story. I hope that I am successfull.

god bless you and give you comfort and strength

Thank you very much.

Yesterday was another hard day. We had been up all night with a sick daughter and I was very tired. I have been having episodes where I hear a dog barking in a distance and think "that sounds like Bonnie", or when I am letting the dogs out, and Carly is standing in the shadow and I think it is Bonnie. I am not crying uncontrollably any more, and I am able to recall many of her memories fondly, in happiness, but I am still having times where the emptiness just won't be denied. There is a hole there in my heart.

I keep going back and forth between being miserable because of her absence, and the resolve to live her love by giving it to others, caring for others, honoring her memory through being good and kind to those in my family.

I know it is selfish of me to wallow in the past, missing her, failing those around me who need me in the here and now, and I want to honor her by loving and caring for those who remain, but in the same love I felt from her. I am starting to have a better time of it, but I am shocked at how long this is going on.

This hurt is deeper than anything I have ever felt before.