Anyone get to the point that they get sick of WP?

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smudge
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10 Nov 2013, 10:22 am

OK, something positive. During the last couple of years, I've finally learned how to enjoy my own company. I truly enjoy going out on my own without the fear of people around me judging me for anything. In fact, because of the lack of people around me I can feel a connection with - when I go out, I prefer and enjoy things *much more* on my own. Simple things like walking around and exploring new places, trips to the cinema, sometimes eating out on my own. It's a new kind of feeling, and during it I feel very content and peaceful.

I admit, I do feel I'm missing out by not having a social life, which still makes me feel lonely. But having the above makes life for me so much happier and meaningful.


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FlanMaster
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10 Nov 2013, 11:17 am

smudge wrote:
I admit, I do feel I'm missing out by not having a social life, which still makes me feel lonely. But having the above makes life for me so much happier and meaningful.


You could rescue a boxer :D If you can stand the energy they have, most of them have so much love to give. You could rescue a boy or a girl, or a pair, they will listen to you and never interrupt. They may not have the best advise but they are great with hugs and affection. If you have or want to learn patience, you can rescue a scared one and watch him or her blossom into a big ball of mushy boxer love.

Then you might find some mushy guy who falls in love with your lovable boxer(s), as you're being dragged, er, walking down the streets exercising them, and suddenly wants to hear everything you have to say because you are such a great person for caring so much about these wonderful blessings, then falls madly in love with you. All because you love boxers :D

http://www.boxerdogrescue.co.uk/
http://boxer.rescueshelter.com/uk
http://www.boxerrescuesouthern.co.uk/Pages/default.aspx
http://www.boxerrescueliverpool.co.uk/
http://www.nayboxerrescue.co.uk/
http://www.boxerrescue.co.uk/index.aspx?AspxAutoDetectCookieSupport=1


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leafplant
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10 Nov 2013, 11:26 am

I came here to find solutions for my problems, but all I found was more problems.



FlanMaster
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10 Nov 2013, 12:12 pm

leafplant wrote:
I came here to find solutions for my problems, but all I found was more problems.


I originally came her to find answers, and hoped to find friendship. What I found was that everyone had their own problems and didn't have the strength to be bothered by someone like me. Initially that was disappointing, but then I found strength in the knowledge that I am not alone. I try to encourage and help others. I try to joke, (have even tried it in this thread), which often falls flat and unappreciated, but I am what I am. I do the best I can.

Many have been very supportive, however limited, and encouraging during my recent loss of my beloved Bonnie. So when it truly matters most, even those who don't seem to have the strength, rise up and help.


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lostonearth35
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10 Nov 2013, 2:13 pm

FlanMaster wrote:
lostonearth35 wrote:
which supposedly isn't long anyway since the average life span of an Aspie is 50 years. I'm almost 40 and had no idea I was middle-aged at 25. :(.

who came up with that statistic?

lostonearth35 wrote:
Actually I'm more negative and depressed than I've been in a long while. That time of year I guess. And getting into an accident while on the bus yesterday didn't help.


Why did you do that? Is it anything like getting into a car, or a trunk or a swimming pool? I am assuming because you are depressed about it, that it wasn't as fun as it looked. I used to get into a trunk when I was a child, it felt safe until my brother and his friends locked me in. Then I quit getting into trunks. Thankfully this one had holes in the side or I probably would have suffocated. Now I don't like getting into tight spaces unless I have plenty of clearance to either side so I can scoot right out if I start feeling confined.

I'm tired, I'm thinking about getting into bed, covering my head, and pretending my Bonnie is sitting on the covers as I try to roll over, pinning me in and "berfing" about it.


I take the bus (or used to after this) not because it's fun, which it isn't, but because I don't drive and if if it's too far to walk, or the weather is bad I take the bus because I need to. I just wanted to go to the store to get some film developed. A van suddenly cut in front of us and the bus hit it. One person was hurt and I just became hysterical. And as for that lifespan of an Aspie thing it was just something I read on this site. Actually I'm also left handed. And overweight. So I could go any second, now. :roll:



FlanMaster
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10 Nov 2013, 2:41 pm

lostonearth35 wrote:
And as for that lifespan of an Aspie thing it was just something I read on this site. Actually I'm also left handed. And overweight. So I could go any second, now. :roll:


Intermittent fasting, avoid bad carbs and grains, and consume coconut oil. something to think about.

As far as the left handed thing, that only matters if you're a masseuse and you're left hand suddenly stops working in the middle of a session.

Beginner's guide to intermittent fasting (click here)

What science says about intermittent fasting (click here)

Coconut oil, how your body uses it better than carbs. along with stuff about peanut butter smells and neurological stuff (click here)

Hope this stuff helps. certainly cant hurt to read it if you can suffer through it :D


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equestriatola
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10 Nov 2013, 3:03 pm

I was this way two weeks ago. No more, however. I will be here to help ANYONE that needs help.


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Stalk
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11 Nov 2013, 2:45 am

This is like a bonfire thread, everybody sitting around the fire, having a chat of the good old days.



bikehard_12
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11 Nov 2013, 3:27 am

I joined up here with the intention of being very active. I quickly realized that I just don't have a lot in common with the vast majority of people posting here.

Things here just seem so negative to me...I don't get. I know everyone needs to vent once in a while, and I'm very okay with that because sometimes you don't have anyone else in real life to turn to that you can trust enough to not judge...nothing wrong with letting it out on the internet. However, it's the constant drone of "my life completely sucks, its so unfair, everybody hates me/I have no friends/I'm a complete failure" that makes it so frustrating for me to post here.

Look, as much as I simply don't believe it, maybe I'm something rare among people on the spectrum in that I DO have a fulfilling life, I DO have plenty of (NT and otherwise) friends that accept me and I can relate to, and I certainly have never felt like my problems were insurmountable. Of course, SSRIs have helped tremendously with the debilitating aspects of depression and anxiety...and I understand that I'm one of the lucky ones who can afford/respond to medication. On that count, I can say I'm blessed.

But the medication doesn't make my life satisfying. I make my life satisfying.

I know for most of us, socializing is something they dread, but for me, having a social life is and always was an integral part of feeling happy and fulfilled. Interacting with people in the real world is something I truly do enjoy, although I had to overcome a lot of anxiety before I got to that point. But even back in the day when I was very uncomfortable with being around people, I knew that bucking the fear was something I had to do eventually if I wanted to be happy. It was a sine qua non...a goal that I absolutely HAD to achieve, and so I did. I'm still amazed at the progress I've made so far, but I never for a minute doubted that I could do it.

So I just don't see the point in responding to most of the threads here...I have much more fun with talking to people face-to-face anyway, and if there's nobody here that can relate to me, why bother?

P.S. I know it's kinda ironic that my post was pretty much one big complaint about other people's complaining...Nevermind all that, I just wanted to get my point across


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Kelspook
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14 Nov 2013, 8:24 am

bikehard_12, you're not alone in that. I tried suggesting the addition of a subforum that would just be a happy place. Y'know, for positive stuff, general cheeriness and the like. Got shot down.

I think the problem is that the happy folk simply scroll through and then come to conclusion that it's just just too depressing, so go off and do something else. God knows I have. Personally I don't think I'm cursed, or persecuted or anything else, I'm just me. I go to work, go out with my girlfriend, stay home and play videogames while shooing the cat off as he's decided he wants attention NOW. None of which really merit a thread creation in the same way that the sad people's lives do.

So Tequila, it's not just you! I come and go when I get sick of all the negativity too.



Fnord
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14 Nov 2013, 8:37 am

Do I ever get to the point that I'm get sick of WP?

WP, no ... certain WP members, definitely YES.


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alpineglow
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14 Nov 2013, 11:19 pm

I do not allow myself to stay on WP to the point of feeling sick. I come here a lot, mainly so as to not feel so alone. (Not that I'd be able to hang out with a bunch of real life people.)
Also, if there is anyone who is feeling alone then I or rather my writing might help that person(s).



bikehard_12
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15 Nov 2013, 2:49 am

I'd second that idea Kelspook. What concerns me the most is the possibility of those who were recently diagnosed coming here to survey the landscape, being bombarded by a &@!$ton of depressing posts, and being left thinking "so this is how my life will turn out..."

Not trying to shame those who are down, that's the last thing they need, but I feel as a community that we need to highlight the possibility of living a happy life with an ASD, and directing our focus on resources that actually help.


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FlanMaster
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15 Nov 2013, 8:08 am

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What concerns me the most is the possibility of those who were recently diagnosed coming here to survey the landscape, being bombarded by a &@!$ton of depressing posts, and being left thinking "so this is how my life will turn out..."


Equally as important is the ability to come to a community and see positive, constructive, helpful support for their issues, including depression, etc. Understandably it is frustrating when someone is chronically depressed and never has anything happy going on and posts a ton of posts in a short time after joining, all complaining about how miserable his or her life is, and/or why it is his or her parents' fault, doctor's fault, teacher's fault, sibling's fault, cousin's fault, community's fault, etc.,

but some people actually have valid difficulties where sometimes it is exacerbated by an indifferent or antagonistic external entity. To have a community who's members have gone through this AND succeeded in overcoming such obstacles would be golden. Finding a community where experienced members could suggest looking into which meds and other influences are causing some of this as well would be "platinum".

When I was first realizing my dx, I saw a youtube video made by an aspie who visited a group therapy session. The first thing he did was bash everyone in the group, mocking their complaining of how horrible their life was, stating how he couldn't stand depressed people complaining. Then he proceeded to complain, bashing the therapy session in general, the therapist leading the session, his doctors, the people who required him to attend the therapy sessions, his meds, his parents, his friends, essentially everyone and every thing in his life, including the SS disability and related organization that paid for his therapy, his monies which allowed him to eat, buy clothes, engage in forms of entertainment that cost him money, etc. He was mocking "whiners" but then engaging in the same form of behavior, only with the antagonistic "bashing" format.

What I find prevalent in this site is people who are expressing their depression (also known and identified as "whiners"), and equally as prevalent, those who complain about and insult those who are "whiners". If you want to get technical, this thread is just another depressing thread where people are whining about the whiners (some exceptions withstanding).

We seem to have the chronically depressed, and the chronic bashers who think they are better than their targeted victims. There are two sets of complainers, for lack of better labels, one who hates the other and uses the other as an excuse to engage in the exact form of posting that they claim they hate.

While I don't get sick of WP. I do, hypocritically, get sick of the people who are sick of everyone else all the time. Hypocritically, I get sick of the hypocrisy.

Edit:
apologies to those who take offense at this, but as long as we're discussing getting sick of what, I thought I'd share my confession also.


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Kuribo
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15 Nov 2013, 9:33 pm

Alex has said that the long-awaited redesign of the site will be available soon. Of course, this wouldn't directly solve the issues WP has, but a visual change can, at least temporarily, change the dynamic of a forum...



Cafeaulait
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16 Nov 2013, 5:39 pm

I get sick of certain users stalking me on every section of the board I go.