meh

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I imagine its a location thing. as others say the same yet women in my area prove them wrong time after time.
I'd move but I can't afford it nore know where would be good to move to. if I ever win the lottery I'll be moving to indiana. but thats a scary pip dream. so I'm stuck here where having a "good job" etc really matters to most women.
made another thread in love and dating about this. there aren't any poor women looking for a relationship it super frustrates me. I don't really have a care for menial things like most people.

but she like many here (colleges town) are getting a degree leading to a great paying job. so they look down on me cause they see this great future for them and I won't be good enough for future them. at least that's the best I can make sense of it. I don't message or message back those women. I feel they don't read my proflie, and I'm ugly so really I don't understand why they liked me or messaged me o.O

fyi the ones who like me don't reply to my messages so they must not really like me. wish they'd not waste my time.

people attack me for small grammar errors and spelling errors in live chats :S

atleast you had girls interested in you. I've never had women interested in me. in school I was invisible except once cause some girl with her bf wanted my folded paper things.

nothing if you can afford to rent a house and live in it alone. though some don't mind roommates unless they are related to you then it becomes a problem. only thing I can imagine is they are looking for a guy to move in with but don't want to be up front about it. though thers a few who come right out and say "looking for a place to stay"

and what's frustrating too is saying nothing or showing fear is seen as creepy too.. the word creepy is handed out like candy these days, even if unjustified.

There are poor women who want relationships and don't mind if you're a poor man. I've seen them. I dated one last year. It didn't work out between us. It was partly my fault and partly her fault.No one likes menial jobs. It just that other people are better at tolerating things they don't like better than guys like us. And it's not just menial jobs either. Do you think being a doctor is fun? I bet it isn't. I know they get paid a lot but the job itself would be awful (not to mention the horrors of med school and the terrors of being an intern).[/quote]atleast you had girls interested in you. I've never had women interested in me.[/quote]It's not as good as you think. To have girls interested in me and then screw it up every time because my mind is bound by chains. I can't do stuff that I want to do. I'm not in control of my own volition. It's like the story of King Midas. He could afford any food he wanted but he couldn't eat it. Every time I sabotage myself away from some girl who liked me I have to deal with regret and self-loathing, even years later. At least you're not troubled by memories of all the girls who got away.
Saying nothing is creepy? I think it's even worse than that. When I don't say the right thing or do the right thing, when I get confused and do nothing, the girl thinks I don't like her. Instead of taking it as a sign that I'm confused or nervous she takes it as a sign that I'm intentionally trying to say I dislike her when I don't. I can't make girls understand me.

As for showing fear? In middle school a girl would think a nervous boy was cute. Those days are past for us. The nearly impossible task that has been set before us is to gain experience without showing that we're inexperienced.

if life is so hopeless, why do people insist on others continuing to live?

I often see people here pointing out to others how hopeless their situation is. but yet they would like say don't kill yourself. O.o

I don't see a point in fighting off the unavoidable. today or tomorrow or a week. why does it matter why make us suffer.

I think they say it because people can look at other people's problems more objectively than their own. I know you're suffering and why would I want you to go on suffering? Because you might have to suffer for only a few more months before you can be happy at last. Years from now, you might love your life and be glad you didn't kill yourself.

Take me for example. I still have negative thoughts but I've been gradually recovering, both in mind and in lifestyle. I used to think about suicide all the time. Even though I thought everyone hated me I imagined how they would praise me in my eulogy. I wanted my family to be sorry I was gone. I wanted them to suffer for what they had done.

I had been thinking about it for months but one night I felt particularly low. It was the night before my cousins engagement party. I had sick and demented thoughts: How dare he get married when he's younger than me! How dare he have a better job than me! Why should I have to suffer through his congratulations? I must punish him for being successful! If I kill myself tonight, his engagement party will be canceled. No one will want to celebrate when they are in mourningIt was a cold and still night. There's a high bridge a few miles from my house. That bridge was always in the back of my mind. I decided that tonight was the night. I would drive there and throw myself off. I got in the car and turned the key and the car wouldn't start.

Next week I would be buying a new car but that night, I thought it was too cold to walk for miles. I was too tired to walk for miles. I went to sleep. Was I happy the next day? No. I was miserable. I was always miserable but more so that day because I had to listen to everyone congratulating my loathsome cousin (he's not really loathsome, he's always nice to me but that only made me more mad, think of how Homer reacts when Flanders is nice to him).

You say you don't have hope for a better future. I say no man knows what the future holds. I hated my job. I quit. Then I hated being unemployed. I thought I'd never get a good job. I had no idea that soon I would be getting a job offer for a really cool job.

You say you must wait until you are 35? Fine. Keep waiting. Better to wait until then and have some hope of recovery between now and then then to off yourself now. You may think your chances of living a happy life are one in a million. Well if you kill yourself now your chances of living a happy life are zero. You'd get better odds by taking the one in a million chance than the zero chance. If there's even the wildest chance of your life improving that chance alone is worth living for. For every wild chance you can think of there are a thousand that might happen that you could never conceive of. That's how it happened to me. When my luck changed it came right out of left field in a way I could never predict. This proves that you should live not only for the hopes you can see but for the hopes you can't.

There are many things that are "hopeless" in life. Sometimes, one has to create hope out of hopelessness.

Suicide is a waste of potential. I think you'll get a girl, eventually. You're not exactly an old man.

And just in case there actually IS a God....He doesn't take too kindly to suicide.

To RetroGamer:

Lynbrook is in Nassau County. I grew up near Ray Romano--though I've never met him. He's 4 years older than me.

how?

so why again is it I must keep living? :'(

Don't you have any other sources of happiness besides women?

Besides, suicide is taboo for a reason. People who've attempted suicide in the past have later said they're glad to be alive.

I know you're in pain. Why must you endure such pain? This may surprise you but it's so you can survive, even if living is the thing causing you pain in the first place. Think of Aron Ralston. He endured pain so he could survive. You may say he had an otherwise good life so he had a reason to live. True but maybe you have a reason to live too, in the future. Who knows what the future holds. If you off yourself, you'll never find out.

Happy New Year, Sly--and everybody else!

I'm sure 2015 will be a better year for you, Sly, than 2014.

Yep...as RetroGamer said, there are other things other than woman that could give you happiness.

surviving just to survive seems stupid.

I do and I have them. I have every thing other then a gf that I need for happiness yet all them combined missing that half of my happiness isn't enough. I'm just not the type of person who can achieve happiness through objects and hobbies alone.

playing video games alone in my room only brings happiness as long as I playing. once the game goes off I'm alone with not even anyone to talk to about the game. I hate doing things alone. it sucks all the fun out of doing things. this plus safety is why I don't' go shooting alone. I'm a super super super super super people person. in fact if anything doing stuff like shooting or walks or hikes etc alone just makes me more depressed than if I'd just stayed home.

a gf isn't just someone to cuddle and sex with. its someone to do stuff with. talk about doing stuff with etc. but I'm not good enough and won't ever be.

blah. 2014 was worse then 2013 and it was worse and son on since 2006.

Hey Sly,

I'd miss you if you went away.

I don't know what to say, buddy.

I think you'll get a girl soon. When you least expect it.

guess whats depressing is that there aren't any real love anymore in this world. if I have to get a job to be good enough to date them then they aren't really in love with me but the title/ money. thats super depressing so I really have no hope for the future and likely why I have no drive to find work.

any future I see is depressing. if I find work I likely won't be good enough still and if I am its fake love and I'll always know it. why can't women love a poor guy? or a jobless guy? wish I could kill myself

I like being with other people, some of the time. If I have to be around other people all day I get stressed out. I even find ways of cocooning within the crowd so I can relieve stress and be alone with other people. First it was Game Boys, than it was smartphones and more recently I've started carrying around a netbook in my vest. On the occasions when I get to know them very well, I can be around them all day without getting stressed but that doesn't happen very often.

Generally I need to be alone for a few hours per day, even if it means being alone in a crowded room but you... you're an extrovert? You're an extrovert and yet you have to spend all your time alone? Your life must be more painful than I thought. You should go on living anyway. People persons like you can find the greatest of happiness with someone. I can't guarantee your future happiness but if there's even the remostest chance, you should live for that. One day your pain could be nothing more than a past memory.I think I know what you mean. There seems to be a double standard. When I had a low paying job, I would ask people "Why do girls always say they want a man with a high paying job" and they would reply with "Why do you expect a girl to like some unambitious lazybum like you. You need to change or no girl will like you". I even started a thread about it but it turned ugly and was closed.

Now more recently on Yahoo Answers I asked how I could politely ask a girl to start taking Phentermine without offending her. I got the most caustic answers back saying stuff like "If you really like her, you should not expect her to change". Why is it that guys are expected to change so girls will like them but it's taboo to ask a girl to change so a guy will like them? What is the reason for this double standard?

I'm probably in between introvert and extrovert. I'm no party goer . I do get a lot of happiness from hanging out with people, I also need time alone. I also can go from having a great time to feeling awful and needing to run away. like saying the wrong thing to someone. happens at work every other day.

idk. same why saying you don't date small boobed women is wrong, but womens saying they don't date small penis guys is ok, or short guys, fat guys, dumb guys, etc. its ok for women to be picky and or discriminate, but its wrong if a guy does the same thing.

perhaps it all goes down to the whole women are employers and men employees. women do the choosing so they have the "right " to do those things. while guys are expected to bend over and accept anything and everything bad about a woman they don't like. men get told to accept the bad stuff , women get told to find another guy.

seems wrong to me.

Most of the time, I find hanging out with people to be "meh." I could take it or leave it most of the time.