Is is true that Aspie people don't tell lies?

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poppetfish
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03 Sep 2009, 4:20 am

poopylungstuffing wrote:

laseywerecat wrote:

I am an impulsive liar. Oddly, though, I can not lie about "real" things - like if someone asks my opinion on something or if I get extra change at a store, etc. But all my life I have struggled with this weird urge to tell "stories" that are obviously false and I realize they make me look like a freak and a half. My counselor called it "fabrication."

I have struggled with it as long as I can remember - in kindergarten and first grade I talked about my cats dialing the phone and I made up this this guy named Old Man Haggard who lived in a trailer and sold trained cockroaches. In fourth grade I went through a time of faking a british accent. In middle school I gave myself made up diseases and had made up boyfriends. In high school I had this whole story about being from Canada. I told people my name was something else that wasn't my name. In junior college I told people I was related to this professor that I was not related to.

This, and depression, was the original reason I sought psychological help (which resulted in being diagnosed with Aspergers). No can yet explain to me why I tell these fabrications and can not stop. I think it may related to impulse control disorder, because I also have trichotillomania.

I struggled with this greatly when I was a child and into my teenaged years...in a very similar way to what you describe.....I was an impulsive story teller....I could not help it...stuff would pop into my head....and then come out of my mouth....this tendency certainly blend in well with all my other awkward features....since my stories were so outrageously unbelievable :roll:

Gah...I was born on an airplane that was flying across the Atlantic.... :roll:

I would make up stories about news items I had seen.....it was so awful...Part of it maybe came from having such difficulty relating to others...but I am really not sure where it came from.
I gradually grew out of it..and only once in a while something will pop out of my mouth that isn't true. Often times it will not register till after it has happened...and then I will re-work it...blaming my memory for not serving me correctly...today's accidental lie was that my mom attended the Monterrey Pops concert...I don't know why I said it..in my mind there was the memory of this..I thought she said she'd attended one of those big historical concerts...I totally regret saying it...

Often times now when I am having an anecdote-based conversation, I will be self-conscious and sorta feel like I am lying...even though I am telling the truth...and then I become slightly paranoid that the person I am talking to thinks that I am lying...There is a possibility that I might register some sorta lying-body language even though I am telling the truth...I am not sure, but I think that when giving ancedotes, whoever you are talking to might think you are lying unless you make some attempt at eye contact..because the person I was talking to last night kept trying to force eye contact to accompany the stories...I painfully obliged and am now slightly plagued with vaguely scary eye contact flashbacks...

um...I tend to be pretty uncomfortable with conventional lying...I would rather say nothing at all than give a false complement...if I dislike someone, I find it very difficult to pretend to be nice to them and whatnot...

This is what i used to do and i have been trying so very hard not to do it and now i am bluntly honest. I can't seem to find a middle ground. It is so frustrating. I had a bad childhood and instead of saying things like "my brother and dad both like touching me", I would say things like "my grandmother was born in germany" I had a really good memory so i just kept on top of all the lies.

ericc
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03 Sep 2009, 9:22 am

Yes, It's really hard for me to tell lies, especially my parents who always question me about my business. I feel no matter what they ask me, even if it's somewhat personal, I have to answer then truthfully even though I feel like lying and screaming in their face.

tweety_fan
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05 Sep 2009, 8:36 am

i can"t lie convincingly.

PlatedDrake
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09 Sep 2009, 2:27 pm

deadeyexx wrote:

Yes & no

It is difficult for me to tell a convincing, bold-faced lie. However, half-truths backed up by logic to fill in the blanks; much easier.

Ditto. simple Yes/no lies are easier to handle. Giving a full fledged lie with story and whatnot is too straining . . . especially when looking the person in the eye. Its just easier on the sensory to tell the truth imho.

Tim_Tex
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09 Sep 2009, 2:31 pm

We can, but we're more known for being brutally honest.

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MDD123
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09 Sep 2009, 4:22 pm

Lesson learned though, none of us seem to be good liars. I act afraid of the truth at times, (people are judgmental), I keep forgetting that if they don't like what they're hearing, they can go f**k themselves.

Dave87
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16 Sep 2009, 12:12 am

I do occasionally lie but I am not convincing and I feel uncomfortable doing it.

john93
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16 Sep 2009, 2:54 pm

For me the only reason I would lie is when it is (nearly)certain that unjustice will be done to someone, whether it'd be me or someone else I don't overly dislike.
White lies are something else.

Celtic_Frost
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16 Sep 2009, 11:03 pm

I'm no good at lying. I like being honest, to the point of being rude. If I have to lie, I will, though.

MikeH106
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17 Sep 2009, 7:51 am

I don't consider myself Aspie, but I try not to lie, ever. Telling the truth helps people to trust your word.

I also don't think negatively-opinionated honesty should be called 'brutal honesty.' If anything, lying to them to reduce their self-awareness is more brutal. If someone gets mad after you're brutally honest, he or she might just be upset about how long they were lied to.

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Dancyclancy
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20 Sep 2009, 12:37 am

Lucky there wasn't an exam on telling lies...I'd fail.

Am completely hopeless at telling lies so much so that I don't bother trying, also I don't see the point....it's deception and I'd rather honesty..... lies create a world that is even less understandable... and it is difficult enough dealing with it all without extra confusion.....

My partner found it very strange that I don't lie but it is something he respects.

24shaz
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20 Sep 2009, 11:12 am

I can lie but hate doing it and my bluntness gets me into so much trouble that it's unreal. I understand the obvious stuff - like if someone asks if they look nice then you say 'yes' even if they look like the back of a bus - but the more subtle stuff just throws me entirely. I'm starting to think it's impossible to get by socially unless you understand these things.

In saying all that, I used to lie regularly when I was a kid - when I worked out the other kids thought I was weird I would pretend to do cool stuff so as to look more normal.

lostinparadise
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25 Sep 2009, 2:39 pm

i always thought of telling whole truth.slightest hidings would make me feel guilty.
but i am trying to become more human like.

Francis
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26 Sep 2009, 11:12 pm

When I was a child, I lied more then I told the truth. I lied to everyone; family, friends, strangers, doctors. I found it quite easy and I was pretty darn good at it.

Forsaken
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27 Sep 2009, 1:08 am

people with no real empathy make great liars because they do not care about how it affects other people or how it makes others feel. they can be vary selfish and self centered.

FordMan
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27 Sep 2009, 1:29 am

Yes, personally I do, although I don't like to, sometimes you feel you have to to avoid conflict.

sinsboldly wrote:

Is is true that Aspie people don't tell lies?

yes!

(and if you believe that, then you need to know Aspies are people first, and Aspies second.)

Merle

Well said! I couldn't have put it better myself

EDIT: After thinking about this for a few minutes, I remembered one of my friends who is also an aspie, who lies quite often. It's the sort of stuff that it doesn't matter about them lying, but they get caught out most of the time, and thus they have lost a lot of credability. Thing is, he lies about things in the same subject that most of his knowledge is in, so unless someone knows exactly what he's talking about, they could be forgiven for thinking he wasn't lying.

Also, I remembered that apparently learning to lie is a sign of intelligence, and most of us are at least somewhat intelligent. Doesn't mean it comes easily to us all, or that we enjoy it, but as a means to an end most of us will do it. I think anyway.

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