Feeling hopeless (trigger warning - suicide)

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I just wanted to say Hi, Ms. Dragon

Me too. Hi Dragons.

I watched a tv doc on complex surgery last night and it left me feeling in awe.
There were other feelings too but I just lapped up the awe and lightness I felt.

Other tv programs just leave me neutral and some can agitate me.
I think tv can be used therapeutically if we know what our reaction will be.
Just as we can use our dogs to help us feel loved and warm.

Keep the faith Dragons - you are working well.

I prescribe a daily dose of puppies.

I really wish I knew why I'm so tired all the time. I've started taking a multivitamin that has iron in it - it's not 100% of the recommended daily intake, but my mom wants me to consult with my doctor before taking a supplement that's just iron, because apparently those are all over three times the recommended daily intake and she wants to be sure it isn't too much. I haven't noticed any difference, but maybe it's too soon for that. Most days I feel like I barely have the energy to keep on living, let alone doing something like trying to add physical activity to increase my energy levels or trying to get a job.

Why not take multivitamins with iron?

Have you done much research pertaining to dragon history?

I am taking multivitamins with iron, it just is quite possibly not enough iron - less than half the recommended daily intake. My multivitamin choice is limited - I have to get the chewables because I can't swallow the huge pills.

I haven't really gone looking for stuff on dragon history specifically, although I've come across a bit. When dragons were my main interest, I was more inclined to read stories featuring dragons.

I'm sorry you are so exhausted all the time.
If it is iron deficiency then the iron suppliments will make some difference but you really need a test first, how are you suppose to know if this is what you need?

Mine was low so I was put on high doses of iron and I don't think it made a huge difference.
My main problem was related to my heart and then depression. So suppliments were negligible.

What makes a difference and I suspect will help you, my friend, is if you can let yourself off the hook for a while.
Also if your parents can understand that you can only do what you can do and pushing yourself puts pressure on you that can make the depression worse and thus the tiredness too.
Feeling in control and taking away the stress and pressure will help.
Not allowing yourself to 'clock watch' and feel as though you should be in a certain place in life.

It is like learning the art of 'being' again.
The Buddhists do this particularly well.
Letting go of what others may think of you.......letting go of your own expectations of what you think you should be doing........ letting go of a whole bag of s**t on your shoulders........just let it all float off and f**k off.

I have a little breathing mantra I do when I feel at though I am building up for something explosive.
It is a quick fix but works when other techniques do not.

I say out loud 'f**k it'
Then I take a deep breath in.
Then as I slowly let this breath out
I say 'let it go'

You can replace any of these words with those which feel more comfortable if needed.

Take care

It is possible that your fatigue & lack of energy is caused by a lack of iron intake, but I do not know anything about that subject. It may be a good idea to talk with your doctor about it.



Every day, I take a Centrum vitamin in addition to my regular 20 mg dose of Paxil. Right now, I am reading the label on the bottle, and it says Amount Per Serving % DV Iron 8 mg 44%. The front of the label says they are good for energy, immunity, metabolism, and muscle function. You could try these Centrum multivitamins, if you want to. They may be available where you live.



If the iron that you are taking is three times the recommended limit, then you could split the pill in to a smaller dose. You could use a knife, and there are also inexpensive pill cutters available for sale at drug stores & pharmacies.



Is you self-harm habit getting any better? Are you still having problems sleeping? How well are your other medications working for you?



If you need anything else, then I am still here for you. Big hugs.

The multivitamins I'm taking are actually Centrum Chewables. You're right, I could split iron supplement pills - that hadn't occurred to me. I already have a pill cutter, I've had pills that needed to be split because they didn't come in the dosage I was prescribed. I've only been hurting myself two or three times a week now instead of every day, so that's some improvement, although I'm hesitant to say so because I don't know how long that may or may not last. I haven't been having major issues with insomnia, although I still don't sleep the greatest - I'd say I'm sleeping adequately, but my constant tiredness may indicate otherwise. I'm doing okay on my current meds - I'm not sure if the lithium is having any effect, but at least it doesn't seem to be having any adverse effects, and everything else seems to be working as it should.

Thank you very much. Big dragon hugs back to you

Hi Dragons,

Hope you are still smiling my lovely.
I just wanted to say that if any of my posts are unhelpful I would welcome the feedback.
I am not too proud to admit when I get it wrong or I'm on a tangent.
It also helps me to continue to develop - I like to move in a fluid way.

What do you find most helpful on here from us?
What things are useful to you or have worked in the past?

You offer only good and productive posts, Temeraire, in my opinion.

I agree with kraftiekortie, your posts have been very helpful I'm going to try the breathing mantra you mentioned the next time I feel like I'm approaching a meltdown. I don't always think to reply to each post unless a question is asked, but they still give me something to think about most of the time. I've gotten so much good advice in this thread, both from you and from others, and it also really helps to just be able to come here and be reminded that people really do care about me. Posting on WP has become an integral coping method for me.

Ah bless you love. It is good to know WP is helping you in this way.
You don't have to worry about replying to all my posts, as you say, if there is no question to answer then it can be difficult to know whether to reply or not. I do this too.
I used to use this mantra on the motorway when I got stressed with other drivers - it did help. Also when someone says something very stupid - it helps again.

I am still developing on here as I am better in person at communication. I have never had to use my written skills before and they can suck at times. I get mind blocks, a bit like writers block. So you are also helping me a great deal too Dragons in many ways.

I'm glad you find WP helpful! Good job on hurting yourself less in the week, it's a very big improvement and that deserves some celebration! Is there any place that you could go and hangout like a park or something? I know I feel more energetic when I'm out and about.

You are welcome, and thank you for the big dragon hugs. I am glad that I could help you.



I am also glad that you self-harm habit is gradually improving; eventually, I hope that you can stop hurting yourself entirely.



I had another thought about something which could be helpful for your sleep. I remember that you wrote on one post that you like music. There is a device which some people use in their sleep called a pillow speaker, which is an electronic loud speaker that goes under your pillow & has a wire which connects to the head phone socket on a music device, and you can listen to music while you sleep. It is something you could look in to if you are interested.



Do you have another appointment with you therapist scheduled yet? I hope he is able to help you better than he has been doing before.



I am still confident that you will find a new job & your own place to live soon. Big hugs.

There is a park where I sometimes go to walk Merlin. I don't really like going there just to hang out because I get too anxious around other people, but I can try taking Merlin for more frequent walks there. If I go and bring a book and hang out on a bench, if there are other people around, I quickly get so anxious that I end up leaving. It's easier if I'm walking.