13 Nov 2015, 11:20 pm
RetroGamer87 wrote:
sly279 wrote:
Also she's really pretty, thin, and think makes more then me as I think she's the lead for her department. All strikes against me.
Sly, those aren't strikes against you, those things are good for you. Since she's clearly interested in you those are all good qualities for her to have.If she asks you about your college, income, home life, etc, be honest but don't try to sound too bitter or self-deprecating about it. Also don't try to sound too boastful about it. I don't think you're boastful, I just mean don't overcompensate. The two things that scare girls away are lack of confidence and arrogance, that means you must not undersell yourself or oversell yourself.
Remember that a confident guy spends more time complimenting other people than himself. Don't flatter her but if she really is pretty you can probably get away with telling her so. Instead of saying she's thin, you could say she's fit.
Anyway, she's displayed interest in you so the ball is in your court. She's expecting you to make the next move and she won't do it for you. I know NTs can be confusing but in her mind she's already sent you clear signals so if you don't act now, she'll think you're intentionally trying to tell her you're not into her.
Since she's at work you may want to maintain plausible deniability. You should ask her to go somewhere with you after work, cafe, etc. That way your lack of car won't be an issue. I'm guessing your work in town.
Anyway, best of luck to you getting to know her. It couldn't have happened to a nicer guy
Or she's just being friendly. Had this happen at my last job girl displayed all the classic flirting, touching, going out of way to say hi, friending on Fb, being playful with me, Etc, but when I tried to ask her out she said she wasn't interested in me. I don't want to repeat that and lose my new job.
There's no food near by it's a strip mall under construction. They took out all the food. There's just a bunch of big retail stores now. I liked it better as a actuall mall.
RetroGamer87
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Joined: 30 Jul 2013
Age: 36
Gender: Male
Posts: 11,060
Location: Adelaide, Australia
14 Nov 2015, 12:27 am
14 Nov 2015, 1:11 am
RetroGamer87
Veteran
Joined: 30 Jul 2013
Age: 36
Gender: Male
Posts: 11,060
Location: Adelaide, Australia
14 Nov 2015, 2:33 am
14 Nov 2015, 5:16 pm
sly279 wrote:
Girls find guys on bus creepy. They look at me and other guys the. Sit far a way.
So this girl at work says hi whenever she sees me and last week asked me a few questions like if I went to college and what for, then today she and another older coworker came up to me on their way down from the break room(my station is across from the break room) and she was like"we'd like to be friends with you"
To which I instinctively replied why and she said "you're a really cool guy"
I then pretended to try to get her to buy some slippers from my department and she looked at the sizes and said none in my size the. Went down the stairs before we could talk more. She also may look at me during morning meetings but i dont know because I try to not get caught looking at her and there others around me so she could be looking at one of them. I dont know what to make of it, I got anxious. Women don't talk to me or even pay me any attention on account of me not being a real man.
not sure how to go from here.
Also she's really pretty, thin, and think makes more then me as I think she's the lead for her department. All strikes against me.
So this girl at work says hi whenever she sees me and last week asked me a few questions like if I went to college and what for, then today she and another older coworker came up to me on their way down from the break room(my station is across from the break room) and she was like"we'd like to be friends with you"
To which I instinctively replied why and she said "you're a really cool guy"
I then pretended to try to get her to buy some slippers from my department and she looked at the sizes and said none in my size the. Went down the stairs before we could talk more. She also may look at me during morning meetings but i dont know because I try to not get caught looking at her and there others around me so she could be looking at one of them. I dont know what to make of it, I got anxious. Women don't talk to me or even pay me any attention on account of me not being a real man.
not sure how to go from here.Also she's really pretty, thin, and think makes more then me as I think she's the lead for her department. All strikes against me.
No, not strikes against you. She doesn't know you well (or at all, frankly) if those are your only interactions. Maybe she likes you. Maybe she's just a sweetheart of a friendly girl who is kind, outgoing and naturally inclined to chat with everybody. Talk to her smile, see what happens.
I'd also recommend checking your firm's HR policies. When I worked for a smallish branch of a chain department store (15 or so staff at my shop), dating within the store was discouraged (among those at the same level) or forbidden (2 dept heads not allowed to date minions).
14 Nov 2015, 9:58 pm
Fb looks like she has a bf as she has a lot of pictures hugging the same guy. Like most of them and I never seen so many fb pictures with two people hugging.
RetroGamer87
Veteran
Joined: 30 Jul 2013
Age: 36
Gender: Male
Posts: 11,060
Location: Adelaide, Australia
14 Nov 2015, 10:13 pm
14 Nov 2015, 10:28 pm
15 Nov 2015, 1:49 am
RetroGamer87 wrote:
Good thing you did some research first. Your search continues.
sly279 wrote:
Girls find guys on bus creepy. They look at me and other guys the. Sit far a way.
Wait, do girls just sit far away from you or far away from guys in general? Do you think there's something in our culture that teaches girls to fear guys in general?Guys in general . Well don't you know half of all guys or more are rapists. And most crimes are committed by guys. Sure sounds like all guys are violent criminals
15 Nov 2015, 4:38 am
15 Nov 2015, 6:06 pm
Leave her alone 0.o
She's the one who bothers me I try to not talk to any coworker and keep to myself.
15 Nov 2015, 6:33 pm
sly279 wrote:
Leave her alone 0.o
She's the one who bothers me I try to not talk to any coworker and keep to myself.
She's the one who bothers me I try to not talk to any coworker and keep to myself.
I would tell her to stop messing around with you like that.
And if she asks you why, then it's up to you if you want to tell her.
Also it could be that she's just trying to play with your feelings, and stuff.
16 Nov 2015, 2:24 am
Exactly. She's playing with your feelings, sly. And she has a boyfriend. 
Tell her to stop messing around.
16 Nov 2015, 2:37 am
16 Nov 2015, 6:02 am
16 Nov 2015, 6:22 am
sly279 wrote:
Fb looks like she has a bf as she has a lot of pictures hugging the same guy. Like most of them and I never seen so many fb pictures with two people hugging.
Your current thin, pretty coworker sounds like a friendly, outgoing girl who tried to befriend you. I'm not seeing any evil intentions here.
Your previous pretty, you-interpreted-as-flirty coworker may also have been a friendly, outgoing girl who tried to befriend you too. No evil intent. You asked her out, she wasn't interested, the sky didn't fall, you didn't get fired... nothing horrible happened except that you felt awkward !
And you're self-proclaimed bad at reading social cues is maybe why you mistook a friendly girl for a flirty one.
Maybe every cute girl you meet isn't out to get you. Maybe asking one girl out -- how many years ago?!? -- and getting rejected and having nothing bad happen to you.
Maybe everybody doesn't hate you.
Maybe having no dates is the result of never, ever talking to girls and fearing rejection rather than actual rejection!
