scale of -10 to +10, how do you feel right now?

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Sod off, I don't need no pills.

3.
Fecking net connection is so appalling, my msn keeps skipping messages.
I am sooo fed up of sticking the adaptor out the window but inside isn't working too well.

I know...I am yelling KATE KATE at you but nothing...you can't see my messages
I ain't ignoring you...far from it-I tried logging out but it wouldn't work

0.

I'm all of this far away from throwing this essay. It's the standard 100 points, and I have to have it done by tomorrow morning or else it's an automatic 0... The prompt's not hard at all, I know how it should go, I just can't. Really, I don't care that much about the essay. I just don't like feeling like this, feeling kind of helpless.

I think tomorrow maybe I'll ask for help again... It's very hard for me to ask for help from anyone (with the exception of one person); I almost never do. When I do though, I tend to automatically (and foolishly) assume that my request (help) will be fulfilled (or at least considered), because I put so much effort into just asking. It doesn't work that way, of course; usually (or more accurately the very few times I asked last year) it just makes it worse.

What's more is this shouldn't be happening. I'm happy with someone, happier than ever before. And yet what am I doing? Breaking down over some homework. Blah.

Actually, make it a 3. Reality checks (above paragraph) clear my head sometimes. I am being foolish.

Personally, I find Yahoo IM much more reliable.

Tim

0. feel insignificant.

Last edited by Graelwyn on 30 Aug 2007, 11:27 pm, edited 9 times in total.

7. i feel pretty darn good, ichiro has another hit tonite and my meteorite is looking better than ever, OH YEAH!

Perhaps you can see where said homework leads and what it represents. I can see how it could be overwhelming for you (understatement).

I've kind of lost the ability to define how I'm feeling with a basic mean since I’m feeling the indefinable (where there's no anchor point; no familiar), so I'll refrain from guessing.

2. Strangely disconnected from everything. It takes too much effort to get through the barrier, to speak, to post. 'Cheerful' is too false a persona to wear for very long. And every time I feel like this I forget that I've been here before, that I'll ever feel OK again.

The black dog, who eats all the colour in the world, and turns it grey.

ow starr,
never saw you down like that,
hope it will go away soon,
i wish you lots of colour ! !!

Thank you Lemon. I'm sure it's the lack of daylight, and we've had a miserable summer this year. I forget to start using my lightbox early enough.

Maybe I will try painting as therapy...to see bright colours would be helpful, I think.

5-MSN seems to be broken so I gotta re-install the whole damn thing over
plus I gotta work 12-4 today
but its my last day of my summer job-so...

Back to my normal 0 as I took my last prozac cap I was saving in case withdrawal got too bad.(ran out a few days ago). The delay in antidepressant response is real but strangely the negative effects of negative thinking return to me in a mere few days of no meds.

+5

So far, I have made straight A's on all my assignments. It should be a +10, but it just isn't enough to offset some of the friendship issues I have.

Tim

I feel like a 4... Graelwyn caring enough to ask cheered me up! Mind you, she could have been doing it to up her post count, but still, this is an Aspie board, and she's here, and she's talking to us!


I always feel like I might get trapped inside the depression and never get out, if I'm not adequately stimulated. When you're lying in bed and there's nothing in your head to stimulate you (I used it all up-- years of daydreaming and that) you're not getting stimulated, and you get dangerously depressed... you would do ANYTHING to get that stimulation. I feel better now just knowing they're making the call to the pharmacy so that I can get some more pills! I hope I didn't sound too wierd over the phone. So I'll go upstairs, brush my teeth, shower, and then head over to the pharmacy and they'll probably have gotten the call by then!

((^^ If I had any interest in upping my post count, I can think of plenty of faster ways than one post to someone else... that is the logical sense of it, but think as you wish ))


Anyway, I am a 6, wavering between a 4 and 6 depending on my internet which is shaky as usual.
Not been up long...stayed up most of night, threw a tantrum before bed because a top I thought should be loose was tight fitting (It is meant to be tight fitting) and didn't get up until 4pm.