Rants

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I'm just feeling weird for a week. Or more. I wish I can pinpoint and quantify, but it happens before I realize or make sense of it.

I cannot trust myself in certain states.
And said states dumbs me down or worse, if not just simply just not feeling like doing something or anything.

The feeling passed a bit. Like any other.
But damnit, this is just a part of a really, really huge loop.
A loop I've been trying to map for years.

Said state, made me very, very negligent despite in previous, well, days? Weeks? That I like the system and how it's effective.
But ugh, nooo... No matter how detailed or even simple the system is, I remain inconsistent... Systems becomes meaningless in inconsistency.

But damn this state. I hate this... This... Whatever this is, it's in my body. Or my head. I don't know.


I neglected a week. Or two. And this will happen again for who knows when.
Frustrating. Fricking frustrating. I wasn't even busy or bothered. I hate it... Hate, HATE it...

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Holier than thou idiots can do one.

I'm not gonna forgive people who threaten me irl or who are physically violent or who constantly say racist stuff to people or who show they don't have any sense of a bigotry they don't like or who slander people all the time Or who think the only thing that matters is bringing others down and how well you do in a fight or who drink in the streets of my home town all day long starting at 10am.

I'm not that big a person.

I don't need to be that big a person.

I'm allowed to hate people who act like that without somehow being a 'bad' person.

People do this holier than thou s**t cos they themselves have either got it easy or cos they themselves are numb to being treated like crap which isn't healthy.

It's ok for me to set up boundaries and not let everyone into my life. It's ok to trust my gut on this stuff.

Everyone I told the story to about a certain neighbour has backed me up on this that he was a bad guy.

Just gonna try and ignore the guilt from 'you could just forgive' nonsense. And esp him coming out with that when people are already in bad moods. Hippy nonsense. Maybe true for him - closest I can do is forget, I can't forgive.

Why is there so much anger in this thread?
One must be serene and one with the universe.

There are many WP members who prefer to debunk or mock any post that is one they do not agree with. They gather a bunch of information, most likely from the internet supporting their opinion and post it to belittle someone's belief in something that does not fit into their black and white interpretation of the universe. You can find a wide variety of information on the internet supporting whatever viewpoint you may happen to hold. It appears like an effort to raise themselves up as a superior intellect, or they just enjoy making someone else feel inferior for believing in something that cannot be categorized as black and white. It is always the same people who make such posts. It is pattern of behavior that is not very different than the NT world. It would be a refreshing change if they would either attempt to engage in a dialog where they might perhaps learn something, or simply refrain from posting their contrary opinions. Try and be supportive, or say nothing.

Yep. I am so done with the Yank election.

Seems to take over a year.

Everyone goes for the person they actually like.

Person they actually like loses.

Person they spent months trashing they suddenly like.

Suddenly spend all their time rooting for him/her (to be fair that's mostly on American twitter feeds or from American WP users but still...)

It's not an election I can vote in so I am so done with it, I can't affect who wins or what they do afterwards or what they've done with their life up until this point.

People who use posh words all the time often don't even know what they mean.

If they use them, ask them to define them and break them down.

Probably less true on here cos a lot of autistic types spend more time reading then talking to people & might have communication issues describing what it means etc.

But if NTs can't do that, it's because they picked up the word in order to impress & don't actually know what it means.

Oh...

Maybe they do know they're the bad guys...

Maybe they're just so caught up in being adults engaging in cringe culture that they don't care about good versus bad anymore, it's all just embarrassing versus not embarrassing or like I said to dad, strong versus weak.

I wish they didn't have the power to make me feel this crappy considering I value being good and being nice rather than anything else but still it takes me right back to being bullied & being made to feel weak by adults when I was a teenager.

Sometimes I feel like nothing gets better,
Keep hanging in there thinking its gonna get better,
Looking pretty bleak that things are not gonna get better,
Just continuing to keep hanging in there thinking its gonna get better

wikipedia again
the reli donate button

Disgusting cat.

Been 6 days. Not even a week.

Puked on my bedding twice.

Don't get the point of keeping things clean if she keeps ruining stuff. It's not even me ruining it.

Make it make sense.

Humans value ourselves too much as a species?

Have someone who likes eating meat die then. Not mum.

Not that I'd advocate for that personally as I think being pro-animal-rights doesn't mean you should be anti-human-rights/lives.

I think as a human you ought to naturally believe in humans being alive as long as possible. That's just normal decency.

But mum is the worst person to be saying should die because of humans overvaluing our species. She doesn't even drink cows' milk.