Rants

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Yep.

I hope you can find love and support to deal with this

f*****g upstairs neighbours banging in the room above at 2am, sounds like they're hammering or something. I mean, unless you have dementia or something, every normal-functioning person knows that hammering in the middle of the night is highly unnecessary and so the only reason to be hammering at that time is to deliberately be inconsiderate. But then why would you want to live your life revolving around trying to piss off your neighbours? Is it because they don't work or don't go out ever so they're bored and just want to start trouble? One of these days I'm going to reach my limit and it ain't gonna be pretty.

I mean who else says "hmm, I can't sleep, so I'm going to bang a nail into the wall at 2am"? Or "it's midnight, we've been thumping about in the living-room most of the day but hey it's time to sweep the bedroom for the third time today and bash the broom against every piece of furniture and skirting-board I can see as I do it, because the suckers below can't stop us from sweeping"?

I hate living in a downstairs apartment because whoever moves in upstairs always seems to be agoraphobic, OCD and insomnic, and those three combined mean no peace for the neighbours.

My upstairs neighbours never seem to go out and make a load of noise. Pain in the arse. I hope to get a council bungalow in a few years.

That's what I want, but it's so hard to get these days in the UK. When you're poor like me and my boyfriend you can only afford to rent in very cheap apartments where you're stuck with the least ideal neighbours. But being so my boyfriend is 60 I'm hoping we might be eligible for an old people's bungalow, but I'm not sure if we both have to be 60 in order to afford to rent an old people's bungalow.

I think your eligibility would be based on the older person in your relationship (they need to be the one on the housing list).

You need to do some research on council areas that are less popular and get on as many housing lists as possible to increase your chances of getting somewhere.

It's almost 4am and I'm still awake. The last few months have been full of bouts of insomnia. I'm not sleeping well more often than I am. Even if I could fall asleep right now, I'd still have to get up in a little over two hours. I keep getting stuck in this cycle where I start to slowly get more than three hours sleep a night, then boom...back to this. I'm over this s***. I think I know why this is happening. I'm stuck in this spot from my own doing and as I gripe about the consequences to it, I do absolutely nothing to change it. I'm sick of myself more than I am the lack of sleep. I need a solid kick in the a** right about now.

I think doing research is our weak spot. But sooner or later these inconsiderate weirdos upstairs will drive me to insanity so I'll have to do something to get out of here. Such a shame though, because this is a nice area to live (plenty of parking, not much crime, in walking distance to the nearest supermarket, etc).

I wouldn’t leave, Joe. Sounds like a decent area. Sorry you have to go through all the noise.

It's causing me a lot of stress. Yes I do have noise-cancelling headphones but it makes it hard to communicate when wearing them, and it's not fair that I have to wear them all the time. I feel restricted.

It just sounds like they're always dropping things, stumbling over, running or leaping into each room, banging things on the wall, marching around, rolling across the floor, moving furniture...I could go on.
Sometimes when I'm at work my boyfriend says they go out for an hour or two, but NEVER when I'm here. Every weekend they're up there banging, practically all night as well as all day. After a week of working I like at least one day indoors where I can be lazy but I can't enjoy it because of them. We're going out today but I bet they won't, and they'll be here banging when we get back.
I can't even relax in the living-room any more unless I have headphones on. It's affecting the communication in our relationship. We've politely brought it up to them that they make a lot of noise but they didn't listen and they're still banging. Last night they kept walking around their bedroom (which is above our's) at 3am. It woke me up. It's like they're just walking around in circles in their room, stepping on every creaky floorboard, and the occasional stumble and then knocking sounds.

And no they're not old or disabled. They're just inconsiderate as*holes.

I have to come in early tomorrow and I'm considering saying f**k no and maybe calling out entirely. I wanted to come I'm early on Friday to avoid my entire department having to do it on Monday anyways, because I knew this would happen, but my aunt and my friend didn't want to just get it over with. Well, how about I don't want to deal with this BS and I just call out. It's not my problem if other people are too lazy to just get s**t done, and I'm not going to spend my entire day f*****g stressed out and being rushed by my whole department.

Do you look for places to move to? i went on spareroom.co.uk for months cos i was living in a similarly stressful situation. Now I've moved, and this new house is silent most of the time.
You're working so that is a huge advantage for meeting the minimum requirements of what a landlord is looking for.

Your upstairs neighbours seem psycho, I dont see them changing.

When you do move out, Id suggest telling the landlord they are losing you due to their inconsiderate behaviour.

I hope you don't "call out," Fairfield.

I'm so sick of feeling angry/defensive and then immediately guilty. You'd think I'd know by this point that everything is my fault.

Yesterday, a customer asked me if I worked at Home Depot. "Lot Attendant. What do you need?". "Loading assistance, but he can help me. It's ok." The customer and I remained calm and uneventful. He walked away. A couple minutes later, Tattletale Tom had the nerve to tell me that a customer asked if I worked there and I did not respond. Told him "I said I am a lot attendant." Tattletale Tom said "ok". Then he went inside the building. As usual, I was paranoid that tattletale tom was going to tattle on me. Tattletale Tom is the same rank as me, but he has been micromanaging me for way too long. Maybe he feels entitled to do that b/c he is a middle aged, cisgender neurotypical white man.

sick and tired of trying to satisfy lil dipshits. lot attendant steve literally does little more than stand around playing loud ghettoass music and it does not appear that tattletale tom has snitched on him. some idiots have really distorted perception. they truly believe that they are perfect or something, s**t.

yesterday, a security guard told me that she caught a thief and recovered some merchandise and she told me to take it back inside and i did. she said that she was not on the clock yet. (but it is not legal to work off the clock.) lil dipshits do all sorts of s**t and get away with it. front end supervisor monae was sitting around on a stool, eating pork rinds. no face mask. covid. some ass holes act way too f*****g casual. and i am way too uptight.

Later, stacked a pallet and showed Tattletale Tom. Tattletale Tom was standing around talking to lot attendant joe. (rolls eyes). Tattletale Tom kept keeping tabs on my worthless corpse, but I am one of the only ones that doesn't waste a lot of time and energy standing around flapping my trap.

Constantly paranoid, someone's gossip will get my worthless corpse made redundant. The official language of home depot: ebonics. the official communication technique: grapevine. "at will" employer. there is no "due diligence", "due process" or standardization.

surprised i haven't gotten made redundant thus far. maybe tomorrow.

this year has been so much colder and raining more than the past two years. two years ago, 2020, i did not even turn on the heater one time.

got wet in the rain a couple times this year. a couple times, shoes drenched from the rain, from before work until after work. 35 degrees fahrenheit at 7am today. feet often feel frozen and zero circulation. maybe it's a medical condition. central heater in Pigpen not working. space heater makes it hotter, but not that much.

surprised i'm not sick yet. maybe tomorrow.

emotional overeating

in the middle of march, i turn 40. over the hill.

deep breathing is harder b/c i stomach feels fatter. weighed self a couple weeks ago though. still 116#. been 120 pounds plus or minus 15 pounds, since age 14 til 39 and counting.

even when weight stays the same, circumference increasing. physically weaker and slower. emotionally more fragile. socially more awkward. mentally slower. brainfog.

been wasting too much cash lately. esp on grub.

"people" used to be not in the news-category,
see msm now, people- people- people-
is that weinstein? or some creepy fat french producer?

l'oreal that fashionable fash-ism /
big chemical & big pharma for one; think about the investors!!
find a whitegreenblackrainbow cure

re, the possible french producer, that didn't help
Fifth Element director Luc Besson accused of drugging and raping woman ...
the thrill of abuse ? again ??
how sick is the world when sick people are at the center of illusions