Rants

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I wish you would stop going on and on and on and on and on about it.

Annoying coworkers: tattle tale tom, Tracie, annoying Alberto, day laborers

Annoying (high maintenance) officer DEH, ass hole

Work has been cutting hours lately

Plenty of employees made redundant or quit

Afraid of colonoscopy

Pretty soon need colostomy bag s**t

Spoiled upper middle class brat and it's doctor spock psychobabble dad

My old man

Constantly afraid of identity theft s**t

Pretty soon I will be too physically weak to do my job and no other job will hire my worthless corpse s**t

Maybe the colonoscopy prep itself will make defecating easier

my old man and old woman used to be annoying and s**t. micromanaging. they said "ha?" instead of "excuse me". but @ least as long as i lived with them, i didn't have to work a dumpster fire "job" (or any other job). they paid room, board, car, and everything else. sometimes i used to wish that they were dead. now that they have been dead for a couple of years, i realize that i didn't really want them dead. also, they were really great at financial management. they were never unemployed, on government benefits, homeless, or hungry. they also did not earn that much $$$. and they had a 6 and 2 year old when they were my age (41). when they were my age, neither one had a bachelor's degree. i have a bachelor's degree. they were a paraprofessional preschool teacher and warehouse worker. i'm a lot attendant. i have more education and fewer financial dependents than them, and i still can barely afford anything.

spoiled upper middle class brat

jekbjkjdwobihdwbjohwdojvdwhk just found out my favorite K-pop group disbanded last month
Gahhhh no wonder they hadn’t uploaded on their youtube in 2 monthsssss

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A single word question messed up dinner.

My mom was talking about birthdays (3/4 of her kids are fall babies), and how this year she’d like to have the usual birthday dinner, but without my dad, who’s always at the birthday dinners.

I asked “Why?”

Not thinking about how my mom could and does have literal trauma from him.
I’ve never heard of her being uncomfortable in his presence, so i’ve never given much thought about it. But it of course makes sense, her having a traumatic relationship with him when they were together. I don’t know details.

Anyway, after i asked, she looked at me and started talking about how she has trauma because of him, and her seeing him can remind her.
They divorced about 7 years ago now, I’m the youngest kid so we all remember it…

My sister left the table in tears, having brought up unpleasant memories and feelings. I wanted to cry and did a bit.

I just shouldn’t have asked and talked separately to my mom about it, and used my noggin before speaking, but oh well.
What else did i expect the answer be to my question? No idea

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AuDHD
Neurofibromatosis Type II (NF2)

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~~~~~~~~~~

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My roommate practically forced me to disclose my diagnosis to him this morning, when he asked what that website "Wrong Planet" was that he kept seeing me using. He didn't intend anything of course and I'm not mad at him. And it's not really a big deal because anyone with half a brain can see that I'm weird and probably ND ... I guess I just avoid specifying autism because it's so widely misunderstood.

I think what bothers me most is just that he was looking over my shoulder in the first place. If I'd known he was doing that I would've gone somewhere else to use the site, but I assumed it was rude to do that. I don't know if it's rude but it should be. It's an invasion of privacy. I deliberately avert my eyes from other people's screens because if I see what they're doing it feels like I'm spying on them. But I'm still not mad at him because I don't even know if what he did was acceptable, if it is I'm just mad at society for making it okay to spy on people.

The only one true way for me to erase my digital footprint is to wait for my own mother to die or be banned at using internet forever -- because she just fricking never fricking listen to STOP POSTING MY FRICKING PHOTOS AND INFO ABOUT ME WITHOUT MY FRICKING FRICKING CONSENT.


Someday, I might have to earn enough money to never share the same internet connection provider as her because of her fricking ignorance.

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Nobody f****** listens to me.

Have you ever tried something like this, utterlyabsurd?

You can buy privacy filters to fit your screen which makes it hard for people looking over your shoulder to see clearly what you see on your screen, when looking directly at it:

I hate the anxiety my meds can’t treat.

The fear that if i go out and do something, i get a job, i volunteer, anything in which i could socialize, i get scared that something could happen.

What if i have a panic attack? What if something horribly embarrassing happens? What if?

This anxiety keeps me from things i would like to do. It keeps me secluded and reclusive. I hate it.
It’s been like this for years and i just want it to stop. I want to rewind the years, kick that anxiety and fear away and live my damn life.
Let me go out and meet people who love and adore me in ways family cannot. Let me love and adore them back. Let me live.

_________________
AuDHD
Neurofibromatosis Type II (NF2)

He/him they/them
~~~~~~~~~~

Feel free to send me a PM!

I was in the middle of making soup when I stopped to call my mom to clarify something on the recipe. It should have been simple.

For over a year my family has been giving our money to AT&T despite utterly deploring them. They are an evil corporation that does nothing but make their customers' lives miserable. We have been accumulating grievances almost daily and yet my dad is so f**king busy that he can't look for something else to switch to. So when I tried to call my mom, AT&T wouldn't let me. It also wouldn't let me call my dad or anyone else. Not to mention my mom's phone never rings so she wouldn't have seen if it had gone through. I texted her but she doesn't see texts. I tried video calling them but my mom's phone didn't ring and my dad was presumably in bed so his phone was off. I had literally no way of getting in contact with them. Meanwhile my soup was completely ruined because of my phone's inability to do something so simple as f**king calling someone. I wanted to scream at the top of my lungs, but instead I shouted a stream of obscenities and then laid on the couch and cried. This is the cost of technology.

I'm sure there are plenty of people who will read this and think, well I've never had any issues like that. I don't know why. Some people understand technology. It may be hard for you to understand how deeply something like this affects people like me. There are many people in the world for whom technological ability doesn't come naturally--including people my age, before you try and use some ageist nonsense--and for us, the whole world becomes incomprehensible. In this age we are so dependent on technology, not being able to control your phone is like not being able to control your body. I rely on being able to contact my parents whenever I need to, because THERE'S F**KING WIFI AND RECEPTION AND S**T ALL AROUND ME. If my parents are paying for a phone plan then I think it's reasonable to expect that we'll be able to F**KING USE OUR PHONES. No matter who we ask no one seems to know why this is happening. Do we have any control over our creations? Have computers already taken over the world? If you expect us to pay for this your products shouldn't be absolute pieces of s**t, and when things do go wrong you should know why. AT&T is fully responsible for countless meltdowns/ruined days/horrible experiences/fits of rage that I and my parents have experienced, and yet they'll just get away with it because it's somehow our fault for not understanding things no one ever explained to us.

I just received a mailout through my letterbox from the National Autistic Society (UK). As well as my name and address, the envelope had their logo and 'National Autistic Society' in big, bright letters.

They might at least have had the courtesy to ask if I'm 'out' yet.

I'm glad Alcoholics Anonymous don't do mailouts.

Ah, yes.
I already tried that -- be content with what I already have in life.

Except I virtually spent most of my life making with less.


Yes, yes, everyone does think that I am richer and more liberated than them for just living within my means.

But that's because I don't make my life more complicated than it already is.

And their way of success or whatever social obligation is making their own lives more complicated just for mixing the sheer facts of being a damn human onto said social obligation.

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Why is the crotch in many women's panties so wide? Arg.