Lies lies lies lies LIES...

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...sums up NT society.

I'm not even talking about their stupid habit of sugarcoating the truth, though that pisses me off too. It's when they just do it for the sheer hell of it!

A boy in my class told me that his mother died in a car crash when he was two, then later he says he made that up and I'M an idiot for believing him! HOW would anyone be able to tell when someone's taking the piss?! And more to the point, how f'd up do you have to BE to lie about something like that just to mess with people?!

I don't know about anyone else, but when someone tells me something I want to be able to trust that they're telling me the truth, or at least lying for a reason. Doesn't have to be a particularly moral reason, just a REASON other than the fact that they get some kind of sick pleasure out of messing with people!

I really hate people sometimes. TRUTH.

Yeah, I have a hard time with all the misleading BS the NTs sling around. I can't read the secret NT language very well, so I can't tell when they are BSing and have to rely on my friends to let me know. It's humliating to get suckered like that.

On the other hand, now you know who you can't trust...

Anyone would have believed that boy if he told anyone his mother died in a car crash if they don't know much about him or his life style, etc.

I find it is easier to just assume that anything an NT says is not to be taken as truth. It's not always a lie, necessarily, but it's never what they really mean.

You may be dealing with a sociopath - society has become sociopathic anyway, with so many of them in elites it forces sociopathic behaviour on everyone.

I feel for you, but its not something to blame on all NT's, their are probably aspies cabable of speaking harmful crap.

While I think neither side (AS/NT) can claim sole license to bad behavior, I certainly have an easier time of determining the intentions of those on the spectrum.

Personally, I try not to equate bad behavior = bad person right away. There are bad apples out there, but this is a judgment best arrived at slowly. People can learn as they mature and often say things they don't mean when in a peer group.

I agree with you. I'd hate it even more if they tried to turn a virtue like honesty into some kind of disability. (Maybe they'd only do it if they were jealous.)

I'd take someone seriously on that too and if they came back with "Haha, your an idiot for believing me" - first of all you didn't say that you mom came down from the Mothership with George Carlin, you didn't say she was a movie star, you didn't say that she got shot in the chest and has a prosthetic heart while surviving without a heart for three months. He said: his mom died when he was two - it means nothing, he could say "I ate waffles for breakfast" and have a knee-slapper on you at that rate.

People like that though, I refuse to call them NT's or even compare most NT's to them - they aren't part of the 'them' either, the specific 'they' that the OP is talking about are people who are a bit mentally stunted; they can't relate to people, can't figure how to crack a joke like this. Now, if he started telling you a long story about it and then deliberately said something to take it off the rails and make it obvious to you that he was lying - the mom thing would be in really bad taste but something else - that could be funny if he laughed with you as in you both laughed at the joke that 'yeah, you had me going'. Laying out something like 'my mom died' - you could have asked him if he had a brain aneurysm or got dropped on his head when he was that age, maybe that's what he meant to say?

Most NT's would also consider that an extremely inappropriate joke. Sounds like he has other issues.

He definitely has other issues.
Some people are just sadistic.
Or passive-aggressive.

Or how about that game where someone taps a friend on the shoulder, then
turns around like he doesn't know what's happening and plays innocent?
My husband does a more grown-up, sophisticated version of that all the time.
I wouldn't have figured it out if he hadn't come home and bragged about
doing it to others. And he wonders why I can't stand the sight of him.

It sucks. I find a lot of people discover that I'm completely useless at picking up on lies or sarcasm, so they go out of their way to lie to me all the time because they get amusement out of it when I get shocked or upset.

That is a bit of a wild one.

Lies that used to bug me more were when a woman would tell me she was busy when really she just didn't want to date me. Eventually I got to learn what "busy" meant and that one who wants to date you is never fully booked.

Forget the Theory of Mind accusations. It might just be hard to tell when someone lies to us because we don't lie, and that person would seem so different from us if he or she did lie.

It's a bit like the Golden Rule (to which, by the way, there are considerable objections). "Do unto others as you would have them do unto you." It might be a fact of psychology that if we treat someone a certain way, then we grow to expect them to treat us the same way.

That's one reason I don't like it when people accuse us of lacking a Theory of Mind. If they're mean enough to lie to us (if it isn't a joke, and even in jokes people practice lying), then perhaps they are the ones who lack a theory of our minds.

After all, they're choking 100 dollars out of us on every therapy appointment. You don't think that breaks a rule of etiquette?

Oh, wait. They make the rules.

I have almost the opposite problem, i'm very good at detecting lies and everyone lies. I find it very hard to ignore lies and it causes problems.

Underneith it all, I think that's me. But I've been through a lot of phases because I can't be the only sane person in the world, can I?

It's kind of like reality roulette. One day I would land on this theory, the next day I would land on that one. Are they really that bad? All of them? Are they really lying all the time? Am I missing something? Am I being paranoid? Can the whole world really be in on this conspiracy?

YES!

Can the whole world be lying about religion? That was my first impulse, when I was old enough to have a thought about religion at all -- That everyone who claims to believe in some diety is either lying or crazy. Or, like in the Emperor's new clothes, they fear admitting that they know better because that would get them thrown off the gravy train. I still go back and forth on that one. Stay tuned.