GRAGH!

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Why does no one get me, or even try to understand me? I explained a symptom to my dad that I was having, and he goes, "Lay off the caffeine." WTF? That does NOT help me, nor do I even drink caffeine. I tell my dad I'm spiraling out of control in my mind, hence the more explosive meltdowns I've been having, and he goes "Maybe you need to up your medicine.'

My mom thinks I can "overcome" Asperger's. WTF? You don't "overcome" it...you can get better by practice, but it's always going to be a part of me. I suggest better ways for mom to communicate with me, and all I get is "you're impossible!"

Finally, there's my brother. I told him his sarcasm offends me. He goes "Well, when i joke around with my friends, they don't get offended." WTF? I am NOT his friends. I am a unique individual who should not be compared with others. He says he's read the books of AS. Then he should understand that I am wired differently than his friends, or mom, or dad.

This family is driving me nuts as they may have read up on it, for all I know they may very well understand it, but they sure have not found a way to apply it/show me that they understand.

I want someone in my family, anyone, to be able to go up to me and say, "How are you feeling?" and actually be prepared for an answer. "I'm feeling kinda down today." or "I'm mad." And just let me express my feelings. I often feel as though I cannot do this when I am home because they'll have an answer like, "Don't let it get to you," or "You're letting them win," or some sort of typical NT response that is really, really irritating! And even when they don't do that, I get a comment like the ones above when I try to express the problems I'm having.

I too feel this way at times, like today. People sometimes think I am making a big deal out of nothing, but it is SOMETHING to me. They say I am too sensitive and all that rubbish. Also though, sometimes I just don't understand myself and why I react the ways I do. I can't really voice myself and my opinions because I am so emotionally shot.

I unfortunately can't really say much but other then that try, try to find ways to relax yourself in your own time and own way. Breathe from your diaphram, maybe find websites on how to relax and then calmly explain your feelings to your family.

I just got out of a relationship and my bf didn't really understand me sometimes. I love certain people, but they just can't really understand me. I feel bad about this, I sometimes get angry about it, but they are them and they are not me. I just wish though that they automatically knew what was going on with me.

I wish you luck on this situation. And I totally get what you are saying and what you are coming from.

Family can be very difficult. At 40+ years of age, I currently have one family member who really gets my Asperger's. The others either don't get it, ignore it, reject it, or dismiss it. I've had to rewrite my conversation protocols for several family members many times in the past few years so I can interact with these people without bringing up my "differentness". I've also had to cut contact completely with a couple of people, since they completely rejected me.

If they can't accept who you are, walk away. Take a break from them. Give yourself the space you need to be yourself. You can't really be anyone else anyway. If you want to maintain contact, communication, or closeness, you may have to compromise. For instance, with one family member, I have learned to always say positive things about how my life is going, even if that means lying, a skill I'm slowly learning.

I hope you can find a balance between expressing and respecting yourself, and being with your family.