I'm soo freaking stupid

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My entire life I've been called stupid, retorted & lots of other similar type hateful things but people are saying that a lot more lately. My mom's been making comments about me being stupid a lot & yesterday in a conversation she asked me if I was retorted. I've been posting on some other forums & members on em are really getting annoyed by me because I say stuff that is extremely stupid. The things people are complaining about are not when I"m trying to be funny or joke around. I'm not understanding things everyone else does, I'm saying things that people don't understand & I'm getting confused very often. When I ask a serious question; it's stupid. I'm not dangerously stupid like Homer Simpson or Peter Griffin but I'm NOT fun or funny either. My stupidity annoys, frustrates people & causes em to hate me. I have no clue why my stupidity has suddenly gotten a lot worse. I'm not taking any kinda drugs/meds & I'm pretty sure I haven't suffered any kind of head injury. Is there a way I can become less stupid or meet other stupid people because I'm to stupid to have any close friends. It would be nice if I could have one person who can understand me instead of getting annoyed by me

Hi Nick!

I'm sorry you're feeling so attacked and left out. For what it's worth: I do not believe "intelligence" exists as such. Everyone has their unique knowledge of the world and people who are called "stupid" have worldviews too unique for the closed-minded people calling them that to comprehend.

Case in point: I am "stupid" about complicated social networks. I can't follow a movie like Pulp Fiction that (apparently, I'm still not sure) revolves around people's devious plans to entrap and torture each other for the life of me. That movie made no sense to me whatsoever. But while it was making no sense to me, I was appreciating things other people were probably not appreciating because they were so busy following the plot "intellectually". Such as: that the violence was completely senseless and horrifying at core. Anybody who completely "got" the plot could not have been horrified at the deep level I was by that movie.In other words anybody who that violence made sense to, did not see the senseless violence I saw.

Anyway. That was kind of a heavy example! On the other hand: I really liked Despicable Me! I just watched it and I am now able to realize that's what your avatar is from! I thought it was fantastic in every way!

It's horrible that your own mother called you stupid!! ! I think you are suffering from the effects of verbal and emotional abuse and bullying. For some reason people still think abuse has to be physical, and THAT is stupid! Cuts and bruises heal, but words can hurt forever. You must do whatever it takes to find someone who can help you before it's too late.

I think my mom was just frustrated & kinda joking. I have a certain knack for frustrating people when I talk to em or something. I don't understand things I should. The kind of help I need is a way to be smarter.

I never saw Pulp Fiction but I think I understand the analogy purchase. I changed my avatar here a few months back. Gru's kinda relatable to me. He wasn't really a bad guy; he just wanted respect or something similar. BTW there's going to be a sequel to it. Not sure when it will be out thou

Ah wow, I had no idea there would be a sequel! I will try to see that one in the theater! And yeah, the guy was really relatable to me also. I always feel bad for the supposed villains in movies (like Scar in the Lion King) because there's usually a reason they're so nasty; because they've been mistreated! So I loved this movie about a good "villain."

Sorry, that was a really weird analogy I realize. Anyway, my point was: you're NOT stupid. Sorry people are saying that to you. Hopefully at least you can tell your mom how hurtful it is to you; maybe she would stop letting her impatience get the better of her and saying things she does not mean.

I never have initiate conversations with my parents about my feelings & stuff. I ask a question when she'[s telling me to do something because I'm trying to understand & it's very obvious I don't. I feel really bad because I'm not getting things & I really hate how it causes problems for others.

I've been in a pretty good mood lately & not depressed till last night when I started thinking about things more. Can moods affect smarts? I notice people say I'm stupid & things a lot less when I'm depressed. It's not my perception.; I've looked at older post & conversations online when I'm depressed & even thou I'm kinda b!chy,& having disagreements with people; I seem to be understanding things better. I make more sense & seem to express myself better

I think mood can affect smarts,but maybe in a different way than you might be thinking.

I spent many many years as a youngster being 'stupid' and feeling embarrassed and angry, until I learned that some of the things I do really do seem inexplicable to others. During my adulthood, my attitude changed a little. I still do 'stupid'things, but I know how odd I seem to people, and I can laugh at myself and not get angry if people don't really get what I'm saying or doing. Because of the change in how I project myself, I think the perception of me has changed from "stupid and angry and defensive" to "a bit flaky and rambling, but kind and sweet". People seem to be more forgiving and more willing to accept my eccentricities now that I'm comfortable in my own skin, and happy, perhaps it shows that I've become more forgiving and accepting of myself.

It's sort of the opposite with me sandrana. When I try to be funny about it or play it off; people get more annoyed & frustrated. Maybe my offbeat sense of humor is part of it. Maybe I need to ditch my straight-edge beliefs & start hanging with pot-heads; they don't think I'm stupid. It's really hard to make friends when the only people who seem to be understanding of me are doing things that I have strong issues with

Hi again Nick! I've noticed myself become way more disorganized the more social and less compulsive I get (on medicine). Probably cause the compulsiveness was all that kept my mind in some kind of order. I don't know if that relates to you but for me depression and compulsiveness go together, anyway.

Maybe if you tried discussing not wanting to be called stupid with your mom, she would react well - you never know! If she were to react badly, still it would give her something to think about and she might change her behavior toward you in time.

Hmm. I have noticed that another "group" that is particularly welcoming that you might find it easier to connect with are artists (painters and so on). Maybe if there's an artists' co-op or something near you you could try joining or taking classes there or something? There are bound to be some non-potheads there who would enjoy hanging out with you!

You don't seem stupid too me.....that sounds more like problems I have with being kind of slow at reacting to things and getting whats going on. It does not make you stupid, but to the ignorant its possible you come off that way to them. I get treated like Im unintelligent a lot of times and its annoying, so I know what that's like to an extent.

Purchase raises a good point...most of the creative people I know are pretty accepting. I hang out with gardeners, originally just to expand my own knowledge, but more and more because they are very nice, down-to-earth people who I feel comfortable with.

expanding my circle of acquaintances really helped my outlook, and made the world seem less small. there are so many different types of people, with different talents, abilities, experiences and ways of expressing themselves, there's bound to be someone who can appreciate you..

I'm not really upset about my mom saying I'm stupid. I'm more frustrated because I'm not as smart as others are.
I'm not into art at all; have bad fine motor-skills & some colorblindness. I'm also very uncreative; well I'm not creative in typical creative things. I think I might could get along well with comedy musicians but I haven't chatted a lot with any of em. I don't really have any musical talent thou

Odds are you're just as smart as everyone else your intelligence is just focused in a different area. Socially I'm pretty thick, but I have a good innate intuition which helps me keep my job even though I have to work with people often.

Someone on another forum said that when she means by me being stupid is that I'm arrogant, judgmental, rude & hateful. If that's what everyone else means when they call me stupid; I must be extremely dumb as well because I thought words like stupid & retorted meant something else. I have no clue what people mean. I'm a complete idiot

You have never ever ever struck me as arrogant or judgmental or rude or hateful. None of those words would even remotely apply to you. You've always struck me as really nice and accepting and humble and polite. I was in a concert hall a few months ago and I noticed an ad for a Miranda Cosgrove concert and my first thought was "Nick from the forum's favorite person!" You are an extremely positive person on this forum and it wouldn't be the same without you. I do not know what in the world the person on that forum was talking about, frankly.

Comedy and music, those both sound like great "niches" to find nicer people in!

^^^ I've had problems like that on other forums years ago when I was very depressed & stuff but people weren't really calling me stupid then; they were calling me a troll, narcissistic & other things in addition to what I've said earlier. I've had some problems here with a few members thinking I'm a misogynist before too but that was a while back & I think they misunderstood a few of my post when I was joking &/or frustrated. I'm very opinionated, have some black & white thinking, & I speak my mind. My family often accuses me of complaining & being argumentative. Some of it could be that I don't say things the rite ways. I'm trying to offer a suggestion or idea to be helpful but they see it as me being critical. On my IEPs from when I was in school they said that I have an answer to everything when a teacher makes a comment trying to correct me or something. I feel I need to explain my reasoning to people because I think they don't understand. I've often been told that I assume people are being critical of me when they are not or that I think people are being rude when they are joking or trying to be friendly. Maybe I'm casing the same problems that I accuse others of. I was diagnosed with Obsessive Compulsive Personality amongst other things so maybe that's some of it.

I am more positive lately but I used to be more negative, pessimist, cynical ect. It was a lot worse when I was depressed but I still kinda like that at times; I think of it as being realistic based on my experiences, what I've seen, & what seems logical to me ect. I talk about my past experiences sometimes because I'm trying to analyze things, use it to help relate to others, take what I've learned to hopefully help others or give em a diffract perspective; maybe it comes out as being whinny, narcissistic, depressed ect. I know all the forums I've been active in aren't the same because of me but I'm not sure if that's a good thing.

The comedy music I like is stuff that is very unpopular & somewhat offensive. A lot of the pop music I like is mainstream but I kind of despise the mainstream culture & way those stars are idolized because I think most all of em are bad role-models. I seem quite hypocritical sometimes & I dislike hypnotics.

Thanx for your post purchase. I'm feeling a bit better