I put up with so much abuse in high school and college

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I dunno what's bringing this up. I guess the stress of this project I have to do for my med school class tomorrow is killing me.

I was involved in backstage theater in high school, I thought I was hanging with the coolest kids around and some of them seemed to really like me. I guess their patience with me wained. I found that alot of theater kids are very inpatient and perfection freaks who yell at other theater kids that arent as perfect or "hard working" or "professional". People get screamed at alot for sitting around instead of doing backstage work. I get accused of this alot because I get really really confused as to what I should be working on. There's so many things going on at once and so many people working on them. When I do get something to do I dont know what I'm doing more than half the time so I'm struggling with the same task for one hour.

I tried really hard with stuff I have little knowledge or experience in and I still get yelled at.

I should've saw all of this coming. I rarely got to hang with these people outside of theater productions. They never called me to hang out with them or any of that. I just to be friendly and hug an old friend who I saw at one of the theater conventions we are all attended and she gave me this weird work like I had no business doing that.

Despite my devotion to the groups, I was far from considered Thespian worthy. I get my Thespain jacket my senior year. Okay by this time I have paid $75 for a jacket that is absolutly pointless to wear when I'm just about to leave high school forever.

I tried to friend a few on my facebook but I think they accepted my friend request. Who the F knows why?

As for college, it was pretty much the same story when I became a film school major except there were a lot more people laughing and ridiculing me.

My question to myself is: why did I do this to myself? Why did I waste all my time and money trying to kiss the ass of these people who had no respect for me unless I was a theater expert who knew what the f I was doing? Why couldn't I see that this was making me very unhappy because instead of making friends, I was getting yelled at all the time? I wanted so much to prove something to these people only to find out (with my eventually AS diagnose) I was wasting my time here? This is kinda why I wish I had been diagnosed sooner. Maybe my eyes would've been open much sooner and then I wouldnt be wasting my time with such a heavily time consuming after school activity that people dont even remember me for doing. I would've had less friends but I would've put up with less yelling at least.

...and maybe I wouldn't mind coming home to do my homework and not do anything else with my life until it was time for classes again.

Don't get me started on the sketch comedy show I did in college.

Ugh. Now I know I'm gonna have a sh*tty time staying up late to finish this project.

I'm not totally sure what you mean here, but even learning how to get along with 'artsy types' is good practice for future life. If you've managed that, then everything else will be a lot easier.

Sorry to hear things have been going rough. I never made it to your stage, having anything to do with theater or other special events. College for me was just classes and struggling to stay on top of coursework.

Well just look at it this way you know you have AS now so you can meet some people who WANT to be your freind not just use you becuse the people eho do that are not worth your time

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