Casual Cruelty/Impersonal, Apathetic Responses

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Dear Fellow Aspies,

I am finding this a very "cold" social-emotionally time of the year. Does any of you feel the same way? I find people are just cold and unsympathic even apathetic at this time of year. Does any of you feel the same way? I also feel lonely, hopeless and unloved, even in despair at this time of year.

I recently lost my wallet on the a local public bus, it wasn't recovered, even though I was the only one on the bus at time. I needed to ride the bus again for my therapy session. My father gave me some quarters, which I left in my apartment by accident, so I did not have my i.d. which entitled me to free transportation or the quaters. So, I explained to the bus driver my situation, and she wouldn't listen to me, and he said saying "off. Get off the bus." I tried to explain to her. And, she snapped her fingers, and said, "now." I left, and then meltdown in private. Internalizing my anger and resentment.

Maybe she was justified, maybe she wasn't? I don't know. But, one thing I am clear about, is that she didn't need to be nasty, caually cruel, impersonal and apathetic. It upset me the rest of the day.

I am sick and tired of whenever I make a mistake, I am hunan too, that neurotypicals absolutely tare-into me. And, use this as an opprotunity to be what I would call "abusive." I accept that people have bounderies and issues and rules, what I don't accept is a total lack of mercy or compassion or even ascertiveness versus agressiveness. I believe deep down that I don't deserve to be treated like this. I have a right to make mistakes and to learn from them like everything. Without it wrecking habvoc on my mental health.

Thanks for letting me vent on this matter!

Strangers make me cry all the time, so I know how you feel. I went to a hockey game a couple of weeks ago (my first) and I was going to climb over the seat to get to mine instead of crawling all over the people already seated and the security lady started yelling at me not to. I let her know with my gestures that all she had to do was tell me --- I wasn't trying to be a renegade-- just trying to get to my seat!! !

Anyway, the fact is she was working for a stadium that holds hundreds of thousands of people so I guess she has to be a little aggressive. As for the bus driver in your situation, it's a very stressful job and she probably runs across bums and drug addicts trying to ride the bus for free all the time. I know how you feel though-it's humiliating.

I can relate.

There are people that are aggressive for the hell of it.

others are because of their job.
like the bus driver, I am sure they have to be a bit aggressive because of the drug addicts and scam artists trying to score free rides.

what a cow! lots of people in those jobs looks for easy targets to victimize.