This isn't funny.

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I go out once a month to keep up with socialization. I was with my boyfriend and he was talking to a few people (I know them) when this older guy mentions he purchased a Porsche. The man could afford it, so I didn't have any reason not to believe him. He told his story and I was listening asking him what color it was, how fast did he get on the highway......then I noticed everyone was giggling....I asked "what was wrong?" and my boyfriend said that the guy was telling me a story (eg. lie). And everyone found it hilarious that I believed him thoughout the entire story.

Why would I not? I didn't catch any inconsistencies in his stories (that I knew of). It just made me mad that people were laughing at my expense.

It p*sses me off more because kids used to do this to me for laughs and it made me feel so stupid.

It gets very tiresome not knowing if people are telling you the truth and always having to be on guard.

I'm the same way. If the story is feasible and I don't know the person is a liar, then I'll give them the benefit of the doubt. I have no reason not too. Did they enlighten you on how you should have known he was lying?

Well... did the Porshe story have a punch line?

Maybe the whole story was a joke and you didn't catch on - not exactly a lie, but people were laughing because you didn't get it. Not nice, though. Your bf could've done better to clue you in.

Thank you for responding.

I always give people the benefit of the doubt. This has gotten me hurt a few times though.

My boyfriend said that there's no way that he could buy a Porsche since the guy is recently divorced. However, this guy just recently went to Brazil (this is confirmed) and he does travel a great deal....so I assumed that since he can travel, he must have a substantial enough income to get the car. I guess he is duping his employer to pay for his travels....I had no idea.

I don't really know how I supposed to know any of this stuff. My boyfriend acted like I should have known. I'm rather oblivious to stuff....unless someone tells me something or I'm asked to pay attention to something explicitly.

Friends laughing at you for trying to make normal conversation?

Sounds like the story of my life.

I dunno if it would help to tell your boyfriend that it bothered you. But if it frustrated you enough to come on here and vent then maybe you should. I dunno. I told a friend I was upset at him for making a joke about me being quiet infront of a group of people who laughed at me for it. What did my friend when I told him that it upsetted me? He laughed at me.

It could just be a neurotypical thing we'll never get. Apparently any attempt at normal conversation by AS people seems to come off to NTs as completely laughable.

LOL!!

That was, I think, the second thing I asked my boyfriend was, "what's the punch line of the joke?"

He said there wasn't one....it was just funny that the guy told this elaborate story and I believed it for so long.

It was probably funny that I'm also that person who never gets the punch line or gets it 3 minutes too late.

Are these good, close heart-friends, or just people you go hang out with on a monthly schedule because you figure you need the socializing? Personally, I'd be inclined to severely limit my contact with them after such a thing, if they fit in the latter category and would likely just laugh about it being a problem for you. They may well do the same thing to each other, but I don't appreciate it myself, so I'd just leave them to do it amongst themselves without me. On the other hand, I have a very dear NT friend who has "earned the right" to get behind my walls and poke fun at me because we both fully acknowledge the warmth and acceptance we feel for each other regardless (or perhaps even because of) each other's quirks (and she definitely has her own and admits it, lol). If she laughed at me about something like that, I'd probably just roll my eyes and say "Whatever---Do you get the punchline of 'Shut up?'" and not really feel any worse for it, and she'd get a kick out of me biting back a little.

It sounds like your bf needs a good bit of educating about you personally and about AS, as do those people, and if they think it's a great reason to snicker about you, then you're better off without them, IMO. I figure if someone fools me, shame on them---and only more shame on them if they do it more than once, because they obviously can't talk straight and be honest and halfway respectful/thoughtful.

BTW, I actually did something similar without realizing it to someone that I think might also have AS (and probably a painfully high IQ to boot). I said something that seemed so absurd to me that I honestly didn't imagine he'd take me seriously, but he did, and he tried to explain what I'd made reference to. I continued it for a few rounds, in front of others in the family who found it quite amusing, and I really honestly thought he was playing along with my absurdism and might even turn it back on me, lol. I felt kind of bad when I discovered he really was taking it seriously. But thankfully we were all family, there, even if he's sort of unofficially-adopted, and everyone in this family has very odd quirks and appreciates them in others. We laugh about that incident, but he's every bit as accepted as anyone else, and openly acknowledged to have his own great strengths and mental processes (and inherent worth completely aside from them).

I guess my point is that you know you're with the right person/people when your guard goes down and you feel at ease the vast majority of the time, and laughter brings exasperation at worst, and very rarely any pain. It took me 20 years to begin to find that in anyone but my mom. My husband refuses to be around anyone who laughs at me in a way that bothers me, and would have more than a few words with even his best friend if that one did it---no one attacks his other half

It isn't just a case of "Aspies vs The World". People tell these sorts of "jokes" to mess with people. It takes a certain kind of talker to pull it off, and I guess it is a challenge to see if they can trick someone, not specifically someone who is AS... just anyone who takes what people say at face value. Then the rest of the crowd gets to feel they were sage enough not to fall for it as well.

My husband is very good at "pulling someone's leg". He does not usually try with me, but he has been known to do it to others... And my grandfather used to tell me about "When he was a little girl..." when I was only about four years old. (He was not post op or something, he was pulling my leg.)

So the original guy probably did not mean for it to be hurtful, he was just amusing himself and his audience, but I do agree that it wasn't nice that your bf didn't try to clue you in.

He's typically an understanding guy, but he feels that I am too sensitive and need to toughen up. That's what most people say....is that I need to get thicker skin. They could be right, I don't know.



I wouldn't call these people close friends, they are my boyfriend's friends. I don't actually have anyone I would consider a close friend. I just hang out with them by default.



My boyfriend had always told me I'm uptight about situations like this. Perhaps I could be a little less defensive, but it was in a group of people and made it especially embarrassing.....I'm not very at ease with more than a couple people. You are totally right when you mention about being around the right people. They can also tell a story in the right way where it doesn't seem so condescending. It's the same as teasing. Some people can do it, and it seems like they are taunting you, others can do it and it seems like in good fun.



That's actually a very good point. I never thought of it that way. But yes, I agree, my boyfriend, after 7 years should know me and/or know when to clue me in by now.

Thanks everyone for helping me out. I really appreciate it.