RE: "Suffer from society" -Can I put that as my facebook status if I quote you ?? Brilliant... Quick, run, RUN to your nearest bumper sticker/t shirt maker and profit, young one...
Omerik wrote:
Written as someone who's been ashamed of his weirdness for years...
Look at the society around you - do you really want to be like everyone? You can't. You have the gift of being an individual. What's better than embracing the differences of the human race?
As said on other topics, I was afraid to show myself for years. Than I found out that once I learn (also from mistakes) how to behave socially well enough, I can still stay different - and suprisingly, that's what makes it easier for me to be likeable. I've not changed, I just speak to NTs in their own language. But I keep my habits, my thoughts, my interests, my humour, my weird ideas, my strange way of life - and life is not high school. Wherever I go, I see more and more people who are open, and accept you, and even keep telling you that you're amazingly different.
After years of being shut down, because of feeling different (only spoke to people on the internet, mostly adults who were impressed by me) - what can make me happier than seeing people compliment my difference? People always told me I'm a star. I was afraid to shine. Each one of you is a star. If you learn how to show some emotions, and what hurts others - you're not the problem, they're the ones.
With all my difficulties, I sometimes really feel I'm the richest man on the planet. And the only money I get is from my parents while I study, and from my friends who acknowledge me having problems working, and like me enough to buy me another beer, and know I would do the same.
What's bad about being devout to your interests, and expertising on the things you're sure you love?
What's bad about leading a way of life that hurts no one, and makes people tell you you're brave for keeping it?
What's bad about being so honest and caring, that when you talk to people, they for once feel they're not judged, and trust you, and open up quickly, not like to other persons?
What's bad about having crazy ideas?
What's bad about knowing you are true to yourself?
Thank God I'm autistic. If I have to go through horrible years for this feeling now, it's worth it. I would go through it again.
A lot of us don't suffer from autism. We suffer from society. You have at least this place to meet people who won't judge you. I'm sure that after high school, at least, you can train social skills and meet NT people who are nice and open and great, and your difference will only count as an advantage.
Every consecutive night I went to sleep hoping not to wake up, every long period of living dead, every day I said to myself that's not a life for me, every idiot kid who laughed at me when I was younger - all that horrible pain doesn't compare to my happiness now.
Perhaps I'm lucky, to've been through it all and still grow out to live a better life. All I know is that I wanted to die for years, and the same things that made me feel like this, now make me feel better than ever.
This is just my saying - I've been there, I understand you, I didn't believe it as well - but I did find out it doesn't have to be like this.
18 Feb 2010, 6:48 pm
