I'm just really having a rough time.....

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Okay. Do any of you have a peculiar way of speaking(or have speech inpedament)
Like...I have Speech inpedement & also a peculiar way of speaking. My voice Is kind of odd and to me it sounds foriegn(but I'm not) and at time in the middle of my sentence I start to mumble. It sounds just verrry awkward bc ive made a video of me once and right off the bat, i noticed it. I was reallly upset, b/c i had nooo clue, i talked like that. (but i was aware of my speech inpedament) And anywayssss: My voice at times, my momma said, can be verry whiny. She gets on to me about it, i don't know why, I mean, I cant really help it. Or can I? And my peers make fun of me for it too, or at least they used too....but that doesnt matter. But do I reallly need any more Issues added onto my everlasting list of never ending problems? I'm juust like, WTF? Why does this keep on happeneing to me? But i try to remind my self that: This is Jesus's planned out for me.....So i just need to understand that i guess.....
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whoaaaa, now that i think about it i have alotta these speech issues. Such as the not saying words that i mean to or talking loudly, and the stuttering and just alotta the same speech issues.....wow....Im just glad that i can relate to you guys!! :D

I also mutter/talk to myself alot in public.

I have a monotone and somewhat deep voice. I can also mumble alot.
My lack of prosody has led to some of my classmates making fun of me.
Don't take it too hard. I don't think there is much that can be done about it.

When I was a boy, I spoke in what sounded like a perfect RP accent, which would be fine if I lived in England, but I grew up in Upstate New York. I also talked way too fast.

When I was in my twenties it became increasingly monotone and I lost the strange accent, but I also spoke too softly,

Now, in my forties, people say I speak far too loudly, but I am not as monotone as I was.

I'm not giving out my location, but I speak with a Cockney accent that I've grown to love and accept.

I kind of have an usual speaking style sometimes. I talk kind of like a Vulcan sometimes. I use words like affirmative, logical ect. I had lots of speech problems when I was a kid & I had problems making certain sounds & I occasionally still don't pronounce the S or Th rite. I sometimes stutter/slur & my voice can fluctuate when I'm exited, tired or nervous(more so with nervousness). I also sometimes have problems when I'm talking where I can not get the word I want to say to come out. I have to force myself to say the words; it's like my brain knows what I want to say but my mouth does not respond. I also think I may have something like very minor turrets because when I'm really nervous; I sometimes say things that I don't mean to say or even think about. I realize what I said after I think a bit
I have a tremor disorder thou that sometimes acts up when I'm nervous or tired & I think the stuttering, slurring & voice fluctuation could be related to that. It was much worse when I was on mental meds & I've heard that the meds could cause turrets like things. Dyslexia & ADHD mite could be related to me saying the wrong words perhaps
I don't have these problems often now that I'm not on any meds & don't have much going on to make me stressed but doing something like trying to ask out a women like a lot will trigger most all of this