Scared of going back into school lessons...

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Well, to jump to the point, I do all my school work in a room on my own. This came about after me quitting going into school for about 5 months before being diagnosed with AS; so that was eventually worked out as the best solution and I was more than happy with it. I still get good grades and am in fact ahead of the others by a few weeks in most subjects.

However now I have been told that I need to start going back into a lesson every now and then. I really can't handle the way others treat me, it's not just a few harsh names here and there either. In fact i've even got people making alternate accounts on facebook just to send extremely abusive messages after i've blocked their main account. I only joined facebook to chat to one particular person I know who also has AS, though we use Windows Live Messenger now so the facebook problem is solved. Though it is not just over the internet, when i'm seen in school before getting to the aforementioned room I get the same kind of harrasment. I don't even know what I did to deserve this in the first place, when I ask I just get meaningless insults, so I can't even get a reason for their hatred of me.

Now that much is fine since I end up in said room within a short amount of time, but I am absolutely terrified of going back into a lesson, because this was what happened before I quit going into school. Now I'm proud of who I am, so false insults don't mean anything, and true ones, well, I don't really care. But it still gets to me and I completely lose control of myself, i've already had two people in hospital with cracked skulls and nearly killed one person because of this.
I just get this overwhelming desire to KILL these people, and that's saying something because you couldn't even pay me to kill a fly. Things like anger management have been tried before, but it's not as straightforward as that.

I just really hate other human beings and I just know i'm going to do something I will regret, so now i'm just really unsure what to do and am frightened as to what will happen.

Pheeeew!
Reminds me much of how much I hated school.

Unfortunately it is a necessity to interact with others throughout life and most of them are pretty indifferent to your feelings. Unfortunately your between the devil and a hard place and school is the worst as these kids know exactly what buttons to press to get you riled

In the words of Churchill K B O!
Do your best to ignore them but to go back by going to another room you are allowing them to bully you out of the classroom where you have every right to be.
Controlling anger eventually comes with practice and I have no doubt your getting plenty of practice.

Bite you lip, keep calm and find something inanimate to beat the crap out of when you need to.

Good luck.

Flashback time....

Bullying of any kind IS NOT OKAY! In fact, the stuff over the Internet is considered to be a crime--at least in the U.S.--I don't know where you are located. Same for the in-person bullying. I don't blame you for not going back.



You've done that and the school authorities still want you to come back?

I think you should tell whoever's in charge (principal, etc.) exactly what you told us and that unless they do something to force the bullies to stop if you return, the same kind of thing is going to happen, and they'll be partially responsible for it.

If they can't deal with that, then they'd better let you keep on studying at home. Sounds like you're excelling academically.

I hope this doesn't sound like I'm telling you to retreat--iceb does make some good points about letting the bullies "win." However, it sounds like you've got two more years left. Why should you have to put up with this abuse from a bunch of jerks and possibly have your grades suffer because of them?

Take it to the school authorities. Get your parents involved if they are willing to support you in this (and if they are not, I sympathize--maybe there's some other adult you could turn to in that case).

"Anger management"--what a joke. Once again, the person being victimized is treated like the one with the problem.

Good luck, let us know what happens.

aint that just so...

Somebody here wrote something about 'The Uncanny Valley" (a phenomena in Artificial Intelligence) which seemed to me to put a finger on it, It comes down to because you don't respond and have expressions like everyone else they have decided you are not a human being, this is soo very wrong!

simply make a facebook under a false name that these mean people can't find.
I presume they keep finding yours by looking up your real name?

then just use this new account to add your aspie friend again and explain the situation and the reason for the account switch in case they're wondering.

sound like something that could work for you ?