Feeling kind of crappy today... (long, sorry)

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I'm currently away at an archaeological field school. I'm the lab manager for this project. It involves a main excavation as well as a large-scale survey with several newly recorded sites, so it's a pretty complicated collection of artifacts. Also, the PI is experimenting with various ways to record provenience information (where the stuff is from) using GIS, GPS and Total Station, so I'm dealing with several different recording formats at the same time. This past week, I've been having a really hard time with everything.

At the beginning, he told me not to worry if we couldn't get all of the lab work done by the end of the field school. He said that I wasn't to make myself sick over it, since I'm also here as a student and responsible for all of the same classwork as the other students as well as the general management of the lab and the paperwork involved there. That isn't how he's been behaving, however. So far, I've been told twice that I'm behind with the lab work and need to get caught up. The students are helping me, but they need a lot of supervision, and frankly, my only experience with this kind of work is a few hours of volunteer work at the local arch lab a couple of years ago and a ten-minute run-down of procedures with the lab manager there a couple of weeks before the field school began. The PI keeps changing the forms, too, so nothing really matches what was in the little procedures manual I was given. I'm dealing with three different sets of forms to record the same kinds of information and artifacts for, at this point, seven different officially registered sites as well as the general survey covering 1600 acres of land. I've been getting up at 6 am and working until after dinner most nights -- when there isn't a presentation by a visiting expert -- only to be told that I'm too far behind.

Last night, I was ready to just get in my car and drive home. One of the students didn't understand his assignment and, instead of asking me questions, just went ahead and mixed a bunch of items that had already been sorted. Some were washed and some were unwashed, so I had to re-sort them and rewash some of the items. There was a huge amount of drama, since he blamed another student for giving him bad instructions and that kind of blew up while I was still investigating the situation. I kind of lost it and couldn't stop crying for most of the evening.

I also couldn't stop working on the lab stuff. I kept thinking about how behind I was and that I couldn't stop, I had to go on and finish all of the tasks that night. I guess I was perseverating about it, but it's different from the perseverating I usually do, where I just drag conversations back to the same subject over and over. I honestly couldn't stop until I was totally exhausted, even when people told me I should. When I did try to stop, I couldn't think of what I was supposed to be doing instead.

Frankly, I'm exhausted and not getting anywhere near enough alone time or time to do anything at all, really, other than lab work and the field excavations. I feel like I'm doing a horrible job all the way around, but I also feel like I'm being given more to do than I can reasonably deal with. I guess mostly I just needed to vent, but if anyone has any advice on how to deal with a boss who says "don't worry" but then gets upset when everything isn't exactly as he wishes, please let me know.

I think the PI is learning what he needs to do as he goes. Confusion at the top of the authority chain is normal when launching new procedures and practices. It sounds like he is demanding more from you so he can double check his data stream is functioning like he wants.

Even if you are being compensated you need to make sure you are not taken advantage of. You should make the PI give you a couple of other students to be your assistants. Pick the ones who you think could handle the steep learning curve, and put them on the most time consuming repetitive tasks. Once they are proficient, they can cross train into each others tasks, or teach other students on their own.

(The PI should have thought about these thing, and other workload escalation issues, but he probably never had management training. It always amazes me when people are given authority over a group of people without having been trained how to make groups function efficiently.) I hope things get better.

Sorry about what is transpiring and it's not your fault. Maybe you could tell the PI about the time constraints of the procedure, just as you described here to us.

I like to keep a written S.O.P. (Standard Operating Procedure) and, with your prep work, this can be quite basic. Could you give your PI this S.O.P., showing him that procedure takes X amount of time? You are a graduate student and I know very conscientious - - the PI might appreciate if you give him written feedback about the project. Since his expectations are not congruent with the procedure, you could schedule a meeting for better organization and so he's not impatient. Field samples take some time to process and data is not automatic, as you know (and he may not appreciate).

I wish you had space where they weren't all bothering you though. On the upside, neat project! I hope it works out so PI is not upset. Show him how much you've already accomplished. Be sure to keep a laboratory journal for your procedure and data, use time/date for reference and all details - show your PI. In fact, he can initial/date at end of day so he's up-to-speed on the project, which is a concerted effort.

Edit: .....on another level, if you're exhausted and really frustrated you cannot work as efficiently, as you described. I hope your PI is aware so he doesn't inadvertently overload you to the extreme. To confide, in private......I have collapsed from exhaustion, fainted and fell, from feeling very sick in lab. I frostbit my left wrist with the cryostat too (another story). This can be dangerous so I take your post very seriously. Please take care, pschristmas.

Unsure, but can you tell PI of your AS? Maybe that he'll need state his intent clearly and without contradiction.

Thanks for the kind responses. Things are a bit better today. We spent the morning boating down the Rio Grande looking at rock art, and I've been here at camp totally alone for the better part of the afternoon while everyone else has been out swimming. It's been heaven.

Mudboy: I do realize that he's trying out new things, it's just that having different forms for each section -- survey, rockshelters and excavation -- is driving me nuts trying to keep the whole thing straight. It's just frustrating. He's actually got about 25 years experience, but he's experimenting with a lot of new tech on this dig, so it's all a bit more chaotic than is probably best for a completely inexperienced lab manager. (As for compensation, I get credit hours, an entry on my CV and the satisfaction of a job well done. Or not, as the case may be. ) I think he forgets that I'm still finding my way and that makes him impatient with me.

I actually have had the students helping, but I'm having some trouble communicating clearly about what needs to be done, I think. It was easier in the classroom, where I had time to rehearse what I was going to say and could stick pretty much to the script. Here, I'm having to explain things on the fly, and I don't think I'm doing very well at it. There were also some things I thought they already knew -- like the difference between flaked stone and the formal definition of a flake -- that apparently just didn't stick from their intro courses. (I'm a bit miffed with the ones who were in my lab; I know they passed that quiz!) I've tried sitting down with individual students and going over it while they've got the little beasties in their hands, but it still doesn't seem to be getting through. I tend to forget that they don't know what I know when I'm in a hurry.

Labpet: I did have a little talk with the PI today as he was driving me back to camp after the boat trip, so he has a better idea of exactly what's been done and what hasn't, now. He's also agreed that some of the things just take too long to do and are better left until we have access to a full-sized lab. I kind of wish I could tell him about the possible AS, but I haven't had an assessment yet -- it will be some time this summer or later in the fall before the university can arrange it -- so I'm not really comfortable mentioning it. I did let him know before we came out here that I occasionally need to get away from people for a bit and he's made accommodations for that, but I'm still surrounded by people most of the time.

And, yes, it is an amazing and exciting experience. I love most of the time I'm out here and I've learned an incredible amount. We've had visits from rock art specialists, lithic specialists, people who have worked in this area for decades, geoarchaeologists and still more expert visitors to go next week. It's really fascinating stuff, and I'm coming away with all sorts of research project ideas. I just wish I could get through it without the meltdowns and misunderstandings.

Oh, I'm so glad - - your project really is neat. Sorry it was rough for a while, maybe now you can acclimate. Good you posted back with update.

I'm feeling a little crappy, myself. Everything seems to happen in my favour, and than BAM!...one thing goes terribly wrong. Staying up all night didn't help, either. I'm glad that you're feeling better. Keep smiling.

Hope all is well now, friend

I hope you're feeling better now. I hate it when life blind-sides me, too. It always seems worse when everything's been going well for a while.

Sorry it took me a while to respond. Hurricane Alex rolled into the coast and things have been a little wild around here, even this far inland. We're just west (up-river) of Amistad Reservoir and are getting inundated with rain. Yesterday, the Rio Grande was 60 feet above flood stage and Eagle's Nest Canyon was flooded. There was 6 feet of water in Skiles Cave, which is known for it's rock art (yeah, that was painful to see.) It's incredible for an area that only gets 12 inches of annual rainfall. We'll likely never see anything like this again in fifty years in this area.