Feeling Really Lonely

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I love to spend time alone, but I really need to get out with my friends sometimes. Like once or twice a month is all I need. I haven't been outta the house in over 2 months though. I'm starting to feel very sad and lonely. I asked my friends to hang out but they are always busy or don't have money. They have their own lives (part of a couple,, busy with work etc.) and I feel lame for begging them to hang out with me.

What should I do? What can I do to feel less lonely? There's no way I'm gonna go out alone and just talk to random people at a bar. I can't speak Japanese well enough to join some sort of group.

The main problem anyway is that I feel disconnected from most people. I only have like 2 friends here I really feel good with. The rest are casual-type. I feel like I can't associate with most people or that I can't exactly be myself.

I've tried throwing myself into interests but it's just not enough.

i have the same problem. It seems like me & my friends hardly get around to hanging out these days. & for the same kind of reasons you described

Me 3. I continue failing to amass a permanent circle of friends with whom I could hang out on the weekend, even if it is something quiet, like a park, or even indoors.

Is there a way to take a class in conversational Japanese? This might both help you in gaining conversational skills as well as provide a structured opportunity to interact with people. I find taking classes can be useful in that the structured nature of it means I don't feel as awkward being in a group and there is a chance I might make a friend there.

You might also ask casual acquaintances to teach you a word or two every day. You might find that they will like you for making the effort and the small, but focused interaction might help break the feeling of loneliness. I had a friend who would ask a co-worker to teach him a new Spanish word every day. Much to my surprise, a few years later, he was conversant in Spanish enough to carry on fairly complex conversations.

Good luck.

Lars