Getting angry cos your mum interrupts you while you're....

Page 1 of 1 [ 10 posts ] 

Kvornan
Sea Gull
Sea Gull

User avatar

Joined: 3 Oct 2009
Age: 34
Gender: Male
Posts: 245
Location: Thailand

16 Sep 2010, 8:53 am

..using the computer with your earphones on.


Is there anyway to avoid exploding on her? I can't help it. I have a hot temper and I don't like to get things distorted. Imagine getting interrupted while you're flying a plane? I hate it!

Why can't she, like put post-it's and inform me that way?



oddone
Deinonychus
Deinonychus

User avatar

Joined: 6 Sep 2010
Age: 53
Gender: Male
Posts: 352

16 Sep 2010, 10:05 am

But you're not flying a plane. If you distract the pilot of a plane at the wrong point people might die. Using the computer is hardly the same thing.



Asp-Z
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 6 Dec 2009
Age: 31
Gender: Male
Posts: 11,018

16 Sep 2010, 10:19 am

I get what the OP means. If I'm listening to music and I'm really lost in it, I hate people interrupting me. Ruins the whole experience.

I'm afraid I can't give you much in the way of advice, though.



Chaincase
Tufted Titmouse
Tufted Titmouse

User avatar

Joined: 14 Sep 2010
Age: 48
Gender: Male
Posts: 30
Location: Ann Arbor MI

18 Sep 2010, 5:48 pm

My 15 year old daughter and I go round and round all the time about that very same thing. I dislike being interrupted possibly more than she does. The thing is sometimes I have to communicate something to her, but she does not give an opportunity for me to butt in without interrupting her. She literally always has her headphones on. I have tried to set up specific times for us to talk- right home from shcool, right before bed, at dinner. But outside of that I still sometimes have to talk to her. She has a billion activities and I have a really hard time keeping up with her. Shes popular, in 3 different bands, and sports. I'm proud of that. I have a whole seperate schedule just with her events.

Almost all of the time the thing I need to talk to her about is for her. So I find it particularly disrespectful of her to act like an ass when I do have to ask her something, like when she puts the headphones back in before I am done saying what I have to say. How passive aggressive is that? I can be very verbose but really try to keep it to under 30 seconds. She has no concept of what its like for me to keep her events in order, drop off/pick up times, whose house shes gonna be at. As a single father its alot.

I don't think its an as/nt thing so much as a teen/parent thing. Shes the normal one and I have the aspie traits. But my priority isn't to make sure she finishes her favorite song but to keep this house running to the best of my ability. For her. Because of her. On some things she realizes the best way to get what she wants is in fascilitating me on providing it. But she still fights me on so much its not funny. I think maybe if you went a little out of your way to let your parent know that they are appreciated and ask what you can do to help communication you may very well come to a favorable compromise.



kalantir
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 25 Dec 2008
Gender: Male
Posts: 712
Location: Redmond, WA USA

18 Sep 2010, 6:57 pm

I'm sorry, but this isn't a problem with your mother. I think you need to just get over it. The ability to adjust to what is around you is an amazing survival skill.

It's not very respectful for you to expect your mom to leave post-it notes in order to converse with her own child.


_________________
2101729 Kalantir-Bar-Orc-Mal-Cha escaped the dungeon


buryuntime
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 6 Dec 2008
Age: 86
Gender: Female
Posts: 3,662

18 Sep 2010, 11:09 pm

I don't like being interrupted either. You're just going to have to learn to cope with it. Sometimes I explode, especially if it's being interrupted from stimming, and I get annoyed if I'm interrupted from an interest, but at your age you should be able to cope with being interrupted during computer-time. Instead of exploding try focusing on breathing or stimming like rocking. People will think you're very rude and distant if you expect them to write post-it notes for you.



CockneyRebel
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 17 Jul 2004
Age: 50
Gender: Male
Posts: 116,806
Location: In my little Olympic World of peace and love

18 Sep 2010, 11:20 pm

I wish I could help you, but I can't.


_________________
The Family Enigma


nick007
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 4 May 2010
Gender: Male
Posts: 27,610
Location: was Louisiana but now Vermont in capitalistic military dictatorship called USA

19 Sep 2010, 11:31 am

I have the same problem OP; I don't have speakers hooked-up. I only use my head-phones. My mom thinks I get upset because she assumes I'm looking at porn even when I'm not witch is most of the time. The comments she makes about it are pretty embracing


_________________
"I don't have an anger problem, I have an idiot problem!"
~King Of The Hill


"Hear all, trust nothing"
~Ferengi Rule Of Acquisition #190
https://memory-alpha.fandom.com/wiki/Ru ... cquisition


Wombat
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 7 Oct 2006
Age: 76
Gender: Male
Posts: 2,051

20 Sep 2010, 3:10 am

Personally I think it is justifiable homicide to strangle someone with their own headphones if they won't take the damned things off and listen to you.



nick007
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 4 May 2010
Gender: Male
Posts: 27,610
Location: was Louisiana but now Vermont in capitalistic military dictatorship called USA

20 Sep 2010, 9:57 pm

Wombat wrote:
Personally I think it is justifiable homicide to strangle someone with their own headphones if they won't take the damned things off and listen to you.


I take em off 1ce I know they need to talk to me but they have no way to get my attention when I have em on except going in my room & flickering my lights because my computer is at the end of my room from the door so my back is to the door. What really annoys me is that I feel I have no privacy because I do NOT go in their room when their door is closed so I don't like em opening mine. If I used speakers instead of head-phones they would complain about the music/noise being to loud. When they put there music on in the house I find it very annoying especially if I'm trying to sleep.


_________________
"I don't have an anger problem, I have an idiot problem!"
~King Of The Hill


"Hear all, trust nothing"
~Ferengi Rule Of Acquisition #190
https://memory-alpha.fandom.com/wiki/Ru ... cquisition