Tired of having plans canceled. :/

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As some of you know, I was supposed to have a date for a while now. We've rescheduled twice already because of something going on from his side of it. The first time, we had it scheduled about 5 days in advance. Then he blew a lot of money throwing his brother a bachelor party. That's fine, it's a favor for family. The next time, I received a text a few days before the date was scheduled that he can't come up because his paycheck bounced or something. They both seem like very valid reasons. We haven't tried rescheduling since then.

He posted on his Facebook, "Attention single ladies between ages 21 and 29....hi!" I posted on there saying that I'm still available. He acted like he completely forgotten about me and immediately started planning the first date that got canceled. We had been chatting via texting, Facebook and OkCupid for a month before this point. I know I live far away from him but since this was his idea and he claimed that he didn't care about the distance. I get all excited and then we cancel and postpone again. Sometimes I feel that he's not really interested in meeting me, that he's just playing with me to get my hopes up and shoot them down again. Hell, it wouldn't surprise me if he was. Guys just love kicking me down. Even ones I haven't met yet! D:

And don't start the "at least you can get a date" BS. Having it scheduled means nothing unless it happens. I swear people think I'm lying now and that this guy doesn't even exist. I just want to get this date over with now and am tired of waiting. >.<

Also, I know someone's going to say, "That's why you're supposed to meet people in person!" Well, guess what? I've been stood up by them too on multiple occasions. "Oh I'm sick" or "I have to babysit my cat" or something stupid that is more important than me.

*sigh* I guess I'm just not worth anyone's time anymore.

P.S. I'm posting this here instead of the L&D forum because people hate me there. That and I'm not in the mood for the misogynist BS I get all the time just because I'm a woman that doesn't put out.

Sounds like he was too good to be true. In other words he's not as nice as you made him out to be.

Yup. I don't even know why I'm even surprised. I'm always treated like dirt by guys. I guess I'm not worthy of a good man's attention.

Nope just as*holes (like me) on the internet

...yeah, I'm not appreciating the cynicism right about now, okay? I don't need to be mocked anymore than I already have been.

Hi Erisad. Looks like your guy got cold feet and didn't have the guts to tell you. I wouldn't bother trying to reschedule anymore or leave anymore comments on facebook; he's got your email address, so let him do the footwork from now on.

My cynicism is part of my relative sanity compared to other people. Maybe if you learned to deal with it through assertion rather than begging for pity you'd get better results out of your relationships? I mean I'm starting to see more of the puppy analogy. I hit you with one sarcastic half-joke and you're whimpering with your head between your feet.

Guys who post "Attention single ladies between ages 21 and 29....hi!" don't get cold feet.

I was trying to be sensitive

Anyway, the cockiest sh*ts I know online tend to be p*ssies when it comes to asking out girls (got a gf Pistonhead? ) . Whatever his excuse though, it's not Erisad's problem anymore; he bailed so the ball's in his court.

I guess. That probably means I won't hear from him again because when it comes to relationships I have to do ALL the f*****g work. Lazy bastard. :/


Pistonhead - Assert what? As soon as I ask for anything from a significant other, they act like I've lost my mind. Apparently, I'm supposed to be a f*****g slave. Maybe I'd get better results from my relationships if guys actually gave a s**t about me. That's impossible, since I'm not physically attractive which is all they care about after all.

The Haven is not a place for cynicism, okay? This is why I didn't post this in L&D or the Adult Issues forums. I thought I'd be able to rant and cry all that I needed without being shot at. I know you don't like me much for whatever reason. I haven't attacked you or anything. I don't know why but several users have felt the need to tear me apart for no good reason. Why kick someone when they're already down?

Probably not. But good riddance. You shouldn't have to do all the work; if you do, you're in the wrong relationship and it's a sign to bail.

(also, that facebook comment he made about the single ladies? Lame. Very very lame)

Hell, we haven't even met yet and I've had to do this much already. It'd be nice to have the work split 50/50 for once. You know, so it's fair? I don't understand people. Not just men, but people in general. D:

I know. I was the only girl that replied to it though. The other posts were from his guy friends.

lmao, what a stud he must be Seriously Erisad, you should go out and celebrate your narrow escape

Celebrate that I haven't received any affection for several years now? That's like saying, "Let's celebrate that I'm completely undesirable and will probably never have anyone love me!" I know you're trying to help but I don't see a cause to celebrate here. :/

I have a friend with benefits. My ex who I've been with on and off for 2 years. I don't want a girlfriend right now because the only reason I didn't get married to Cate was because I didn't want to get married as a poor loser. I wanted to get married and drive straight from the wedding to the race track in my so far non-existant 600-700hp 300ZX Twin Turbo. That way I could say that my wedding day was the happiest day of my life because let's face it, I like cars more than I like women. They both make nice sounds when I pound them, they both drain my wallet but one of them never complains.

That being said I'm not a confident guy nor do I try to be in that sense. As far as I'm concerned I don't chase after women they chase after me. Less effort, more results.

Erisad, that probably comes from a history of bad girlfriends. When women constantly expect things from you it does come as a shock when another girl repeats the same behavior whether it was a big deal or not. Being a f*****g slave is not what most guys want, sounds like what a "traditional" or "redneck" man would want though. Guys probably do give a s**t about you. I wouldn't be excited to know that you hurt yourself due to my cynical advice.

Keep in mind, I don't pay attention to where I post. Only to who posts and how new/active/interesting they are. I'm not shooting at you, I'm trying to help you in my special way. I actually like you a lot. I think you do make the most interesting topics on here and I do see a lot of myself in you. Only thing is when I was like you I was 15-16 not 21. I don't want to kick you....maybe push you in the right direction but you constantly refuse to follow other people's advice if it's outside of your comfort zone. I hope that somehow my straight-forward, no holds barred, no bs, no nothing approach works out better for you and if it doesn't oh well don't get your panties in a wad.

1. He didn't knock you up and try to avoid paying you child support
2. You didn't fall in love with him, accept him proposing to you, find him cheating on you and get hurt worse