On my last nerve!

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I feel so melodramatic venting like this, but I'm really miserable right now. Since I moved to a new place 6 months ago, I've been having problems with noisy neighbors. I saw the place during the day when no one else in the building was home and had no idea what I was in for.

The place is cheaply built and I can hear every word of every conversation, every sneeze and every footstep on a good night. On bad nights, I have loud music and a bass line that I cannot drown out no matter what I do. I've tried to work around it and have spoken to the landlord, but haven't had much luck. From what my landlord told me, my downstairs neighbor is a few complaints away from eviction, but I haven't wanted to push too much for fear of having someone worse move in to take her place.

Well, I think they might have last night, but in the unit next to me upstairs ... Loud music until 2 am. I have until May 1st on my lease, but am not sure how much more of this I can take. Last night, when the music started up, I just curled up in a ball and cried, feeling like I'd developed some sort of mild PTSD to neighbor-noise.

There's no privacy and I've heard the girl downstairs making fun of me. It's like having a bully in my house at all times and makes me feel really alone, cowering upstairs. I have a stressful job and used to rely on time at home to kind of rejuvinate myself. Now I actually dread being home. (I'm sitting in my car typing this on a mobile device, feeling all tense and not wanting to go home.)

I've tried white noise machines, ear plugs (they made my inner ear problems worse) and just 'getting over it'. I feel like I'm overreacting and should toughen up, but if I'm honest with myself, I'm really at the end of my rope here. It's going to be a long 6 months until my lease is up and I have limited means to move somewhere better, unless I go back to having a 45 minute commute from somewhere out in the sticks, like I did before moving, or live in a not-so-safe city neighborhood. (The suburbs where I work are kind of expensive)

What's really frustrating is that my line of work involves helping people with physical disabilities get accessibility accomodations for their housing. But, there isn't much help out there for people with ASD who need soundproofing or other housing help before they go crazy.

If you read through my whole rant and made it to the last line, thanks.

Really sorry you have to go through this, I visited my friends flat the other week and couldn't believe how much I could hear.

Hope it starts to get better. Keep your head up and let us know how it goes.

I'm really sorry to hear this. Maybe try talking directly to your neighbor and explain your condition and see if that helps? Have you explained your condition and how bad this is to your landlord?
Have you tried looking up noise regulations for your area? A google search for me came up with a bunch of helpful things for dealing with situations like this.

I had a similar problem when I first moved into a new place, but it eventually stopped and when it still happens I am slightly better able to deal with it, maybe because I'm more used to it. It sounds like you have much more severe issues with noise than I do though.

Here's a trick I learned during my noisy college dorm days.

You can soundproof with blankets and carpets. Hang heavy blankets on all the walls as though they were wall hangings. Overlap if possible. Blanket as much wall surface area as possible. Carpet the floors with multiple carpets if possible; overlapping throw rugs. Hang heavy drapes on the windows.

You will be just amazed at how much noise fabric absorbs. The fluffier and thicker these fabrics are, the more noise they will absorb.

Tough situation -- I feel for you. I've moved almost every year for the last 15 years or so, and I've definitely had my share of noisy neighbors. Unfortunately, the ways out of this are all kind of messy. Least messy would involve your landlord being willing to terminate your lease early and to allow you to move out. His willingness to do that, though, depends upon a number of factors that I can't determine sitting here now. Whatever the case, understand that you don't have a lot of leverage in this situation. Tenants never do. So, you've got to play nice with your landlord. At the same time, I would contact the police whenever it gets over-the-top loud -- also your local housing authority and whatever other agencies you can think of. Maybe try the Lancaster Bar Association's Volunteer Attorney Program? Even if you don't qualify for free legal services, you might get some basic advice on where you stand. And unlike NYC landlords, for instance, who are in Landlord-Tenant Court all the time, I doubt that your landlord is. He probably doesn't want that kind of trouble, so he may be more willing than you think to terminate your lease. From his perspective, both evicting your neighbors and suing you for breaking your lease are expensive propositions. So, there's your (admittedly small) amount of leverage. You might try calling the Bar Association, and no matter what they tell you, telling your landlord very innocently that you did that and that a lawyer suggested that you try to work things out between yourselves first. Sometimes passive-aggressive works well in these situations. Hard to tell. Hang in there -- time passes...

Big size eggshell packaging.
Get alot of those to line the walls - egg-side to the wall.
The shape kills sound.

You might talk to your landlord about moving into another unit. And let him know the seriousness of your situation. He might even own other apartment buildings that would be better suited for you.

The only other thing I could suggest for noise, would be noise canceling head phones. I am a pilot and have found that they are very effective. You can give them a try them at Best Buy if you are interested. Just be sure to buy them from somewhere that allows hassle free returns, in case they don't work out for you.

It sounds like you are pretty fragile and overwhelmed at the moment, but try to be as pro active as you can with your situation. Feeling hopeless and out of control will only make things worse. Feel free to contact me if you have any questions or if I can be of any help.

I feel your pain.

There are noise canceling head phones you can get. They just cover your ears instead of going right into your ear. I don't know if that will help the ear problem or not.

And as for someone worse moving in, that is possible. However, there will be a few weeks where that apartment will be empty. So you will have a few weeks rest.

They sound like jerks to me. It goes both ways. In our case we didn't play loud music, or have late night parties, we just walked around and talked and walked our dogs when we needed to. The steps leading to our apartment are creaky. It's like she expected absolute silence.