NextFact wrote:
Thanks for all your replys.
It is so difficult to try and stay positive. I've found even a small amount of negativity can invade and ruin your mindset. Now how to counter that? I don't know.
From my experience, as long as you depend on approval of others to make you feel worthwhile, they will have power over you to affect you negatively.
Comparing yourself to others is the worst thing one can do to to their self esteem - you surely have some interests and strengths in particular areas - why not focus on that?
Dunno, after years of struggling with the same problem I came to conclusion that (mostly) what others think is prejudiced, biased, based on their conditioning and limited experience - plain and simply it is (usually) wrong. So why base our opinion of ourselves on something that is false? Of course some objective criticism can be useful and is welcomed, still the only thing that matters is what you think of you, not what anyone else thinks.
Try developing self efficacy - it's the most important thing required for survival.
Quote:
Virtually all people can identify goals they want to accomplish, things they would like to change, and things they would like to achieve. However, most people also realize that putting these plans into action is not quite so simple. Bandura and others have found that an individual’s self-efficacy plays a major role in how goals, tasks, and challenges are approached.
People with a strong sense of self-efficacy:
* View challenging problems as tasks to be mastered.
* Develop deeper interest in the activities in which they participate.
* Form a stronger sense of commitment to their interests and activities.
* Recover quickly from setbacks and disappointments.
People with a weak sense of self-efficacy:
* Avoid challenging tasks.
* Believe that difficult tasks and situations are beyond their capabilities.
* Focus on personal failings and negative outcomes.
* Quickly lose confidence in personal abilities (Bandura, 1994).
Sources of Self-Efficacy
How does self-efficacy develop? These beliefs begin to form in early childhood as children deal with a wide variety of experiences, tasks, and situations. However, the growth of self-efficacy does not end during youth, but continues to evolve throughout life as people acquire new skills, experiences, and understanding (Bandura, 1992).
According to Bandura, there are four major sources of self-efficacy.
1. Mastery Experiences
"The most effective way of developing a strong sense of efficacy is through mastery experiences," Bandura explained (1994). Performing a task successfully strengthens our sense of self-efficacy. However, failing to adequately deal with a task or challenge can undermine and weaken self-efficacy.
2. Social Modeling
Witnessing other people successfully completing a task is another important source of self-efficacy. According to Bandura, “Seeing people similar to oneself succeed by sustained effort raises observers' beliefs that they too possess the capabilities master comparable activities to succeed” (1994).
3. Social Persuasion
Bandura also asserted that people could be persuaded to belief that they have the skills and capabilities to succeed. Consider a time when someone said something positive and encouraging that helped you achieve a goal. Getting verbal encouragement from others helps people overcome self-doubt and instead focus on giving their best effort to the task at hand.
4. Psychological Responses
Our own responses and emotional reactions to situations also play an important role in self-efficacy. Moods, emotional states, physical reactions, and stress levels can all impact how a person feels about their personal abilities in a particular situation. A person who becomes extremely nervous before speaking in public may develop a weak sense of self-efficacy in these situations. However, Bandura also notes "it is not the sheer intensity of emotional and physical reactions that is important but rather how they are perceived and interpreted" (1994). By learning how to minimize stress and elevate mood when facing difficult or challenging tasks, people can improve their sense of self-efficacy.
http://psychology.about.com/od/theories ... ficacy.htm
http://www.des.emory.edu/mfp/self-efficacy.html
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Self-efficacy
02 Jan 2011, 1:59 am
